Help Tier 4 what do I do?

[Mousehole10]

We were going to see my in-laws for Christmas but now been thrown into tier 4 like many others. I know I’m not special, I know we can’t go. But I’m scared. I had severe depression years ago, I don’t talk about it much so not even my DH knows the full extent but I self harmed for years and was suicidal. Since then I’ve immersed myself in activities, work and social like so I don’t have to think about anything. I had a baby in lockdown 1 and have really struggled without any help or being able to see family and friends. I cried for days continuously at the start of lockdown 2 but made a plan to look forward to with Christmas and later on seeing my parents WP live in a different country. All that’s now been cancelled and I have nothing. I’m really scared how this is going to go for me, I need to be able to look after my baby and I need to be ok. I have my DH, I have my support bubble (local friends as I have no family locally) but it’s not enough, I already feel myself slipping. Please help!

Contact your gp.

Make your own plans at home. You have a DH, your little one and a support bubble. Fill the dates with things to do, you’ve got time if you’re very quick to order online anything you may need.

You also need to be honest with your DH so that he can help.

Tell your DH in full about your past illness and contact your GP tomorrow for an urgent appointment.

Make sure you get out for a walk as long as possible everyday. Even if you don’t feel like it. It has such a huge impact on mental health.

My son has developed mental health problems this year due to the pandemic. My heart goes out to you - it has opened my eyes to the struggle some people go through. Distraction is one thing that helps him. He is a teenager so he watches comedy programmes, goes on long dog walks, reads endlessly. I found a weighted blanket has really helped too. At night he uses night time rescue remedy and sometimes uses a special magnesium oil that is supposed to help with mental health. I have also started him on Bimuno, a prebiotic that many have said helped with their mental health. Take care of yourself. You can make it through this.

What is it about seeing your in laws which would have helped? Less time alone with the baby? A change of scene from your home? Whatever it is, try to still get that. If you have a friend who lives alone, he/she might bubble up with you. Ask your partner to have the baby while you go out for walks and takeaway coffee with a friend.
Good luck, it does suck.

It sounds like you're talking yourself into slipping back. You need to change the message you're sending yourself to having a nice cosy Christmas with your own family knowing there is a vaccine round the corner. The end is in sight.

If you have a baby under 1 I think you’re allowed a support bubble, no?

If you had a baby in lockdown 1 that means you now have a baby under 1 so since the support bubble rules changed at beginning of December you can form a support bubble

Form it with your in laws and then you are still allowed to see them on Christmas Day

There are definite cases for those vulnerable for mental health/ loneliness. I would go see your family as long as none has any symptoms and you make sure room is well aired/ windows open etc.