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The government wants YOU to volunteer as a school covid tester

716 replies

noelgiraffe · 15/12/2020 23:42

The govt have proudly announced that there will be mass testing in secondary schools, colleges and special schools from January.

What the headlines don’t quite convey is that schools will be expected to set up and man their own testing centres and that this make-shift testing of close contacts of positives will replace close contacts having to isolate. The tests pick up about 50% of positive cases so I’m sure this will be fine.

Covidy kids will be getting the bus to school to queue up and be tested by people who have watched a video and a couple of online worksheets.

Even better, they want those people to be YOU!

“The document says that reasonable costs for additional workforce will be reimbursed.

It adds that a school may want to hire temporary staff, such as agency and contract workers, or draw on volunteers such as parents, retired teachers, Red Cross, St John Ambulance and community organisations.”

If you can’t help in person, perhaps you can support by talking positively about this effort on social media and parenting forums?

“Under a section labelled “social media guidance”, the document reads that “consistent, accurate and positive communication about testing activity is essential”.

They want to see “proactive public social media using agreed materials” and schools are encouraged to “monitor your existing social media channels, parents forums etc. and provide any feedback”.”

Come on folks, do your bit!

schoolsweek.co.uk/7-staff-roles-2-hour-training-and-dhsc-sign-off-on-press-schools-given-mass-testing-instructions/

OP posts:
Thread gallery
8
PeppermintSoda · 16/12/2020 07:56

Are they going to make schools post positive stuff the government has told them to post or can schools keep quiet and post nothing? If the first that's appalling. The people who voted this sinister bunch in should be ashamed of themselves.

inquietant · 16/12/2020 07:56

@OpheliasCrayon I think if you just believed a little bit harder you'd see that all your logistical concerns borne of years of experience are not real.

OpheliasCrayon · 16/12/2020 07:57

[quote inquietant]@OpheliasCrayon I think if you just believed a little bit harder you'd see that all your logistical concerns borne of years of experience are not real.[/quote]
Oh ok. I'll do another 15 years and come back and comment then Grin you're right I'm sure lol

Ninbuscl · 16/12/2020 07:58

I am feeling so sad about this all this morning
And also about the news that half the population won’t get vaccine until the end of 2021 🙁

inquietant · 16/12/2020 08:02

I am so angry with them this morning @OpheliasCrayon, I don't know how teachers haven't just combusted.

OpheliasCrayon · 16/12/2020 08:04

@inquietant

I am so angry with them this morning *@OpheliasCrayon*, I don't know how teachers haven't just combusted.
For me it was cry or combust. Yesterday I went with the former and today I'm just too tired to do either
ChloeDeckTheHalls · 16/12/2020 08:04

Don't forget that your scenario involves everyone doing what they're supposed to and you having permission at the right time from all parents.

You are absolutely correct! Mine was best case scenario and we know it would take longer in reality. Probably all day in your SEND school. Depressing isn’t it?

Iamnotthe1 · 16/12/2020 08:06

@inquietant

I am so angry with them this morning *@OpheliasCrayon*, I don't know how teachers haven't just combusted.
I feel like I'm about to.

There was initial joy at seeing the headline message of mass testing - finally, measures are coming into place to make schools more Covid secure.

Then I read into the detail and the information about how it would actually work and realised that they've made it worse. It's about their statistics and not about safety. It's a massive fuck you to school staff.

borntobequiet · 16/12/2020 08:07

Schools are very good at organising school photographs, but as a PP mentioned, it’s disruptive, requires precision timing, close supervision and takes up the best part of a school day, once a year. The equipment is straightforward, the photographer an experienced professional, the process per student is less than a minute and the only hitches are usually over poorly worn uniform and hair that needs combing.
However combine the logistical challenge with the requirement for daily tests carried out with medical grade precision, delicate and sensitive equipment, the need to socially distance and wear PPE, barely trained volunteers, random children who may or may not be infectious pulled out of a selection of lessons, and the epic dramatics that any Y10 girl is capable of at the prospect of the most minor medical procedure, and you’ve got problems.

Katgolde · 16/12/2020 08:11

How is it 'not invasive' to put a swab stick to the back of the throat and up the nose?

OpheliasCrayon · 16/12/2020 08:11

@ChloeDeckTheHalls

Don't forget that your scenario involves everyone doing what they're supposed to and you having permission at the right time from all parents.

You are absolutely correct! Mine was best case scenario and we know it would take longer in reality. Probably all day in your SEND school. Depressing isn’t it?

We honestly just couldn't do it. The kids wouldn't let us. Even if we tried all day I wouldn't have been able to test any if my kids !
RedToothBrush · 16/12/2020 08:13

Weren't universities getting students to test each other?

Maybe schools could do this?

(collapses on the floor laughing)

inquietant · 16/12/2020 08:14

@Katgolde

How is it 'not invasive' to put a swab stick to the back of the throat and up the nose?
Quite. If you did it without permission it would be an assault.
inquietant · 16/12/2020 08:14

@RedToothBrush

Weren't universities getting students to test each other?

Maybe schools could do this?

(collapses on the floor laughing)

Excellent trust-building exercise Grin
AaronPurr · 16/12/2020 08:16

@RedToothBrush

Weren't universities getting students to test each other?

Maybe schools could do this?

(collapses on the floor laughing)

Oh God don't even joke about it, we know the DFE are lurking on here, they'll think parents actually like and support the idea. 😂😂
OpheliasCrayon · 16/12/2020 08:18

@RedToothBrush

Weren't universities getting students to test each other?

Maybe schools could do this?

(collapses on the floor laughing)

That would meet a Pshe target or two ... As long as the target was how far into my friends brain can I get a covid swab?
ItRubsTheLotionOnItsSkin · 16/12/2020 08:24

The point that this is not mass testing. this is DC who should be self isolating due to their high risk of being positive after close contact with a confirmed case, going into school to be tested every day instead of self isolating needs to be emphasised.

The headline of "mass testing for schools" is simply a lie, not even misleading, just complete bollocks.

It raises so many questions as this thread neatly demonstrates

  1. How do these possibly positive DC get to school - not a great idea to have them on the school bus/public transport etc.
  1. How will the tests be administered, where will these possibly positive DC go, who will do the test, what happens if they get a positive - do they just get the bus home?
  1. Clearly the above strategy is increasing the risk of positive students coming into contact with others.
  1. The wider impact (and also on school
staff obviously) on the clinically extremely vulnerable due to the increased risk - I am CEV and don't want my DC sitting on buses next to people who should be self isolating, or being next to Jonny in the school hall (with the non porous floor) who has just been given a positive result.
  1. The crap unreliability of these tests.
  1. If this is such a great idea from the minds of our world beating track and trace system, why aren't we rolling it out for everyone?

So your colleague Linda receives a positive result and you are a close contact. No need to self isolate, get the bus or the train to work and use an unreliable test when you get there. No more self isolation for any possibly positive close contacts, presumably?

Also, if this is such a fucking great strategy with no down sides, why all the strict warnings about how it's publicised by people involved?

TheEchtMeaningofChristmas · 16/12/2020 08:25

I liked this bit about tha advice:

Schools “will need to consider” designating as many as seven different roles, though the handbook states one person can have more than one role. These include a quality lead/team leader, test assistant, processor, covid-19 coordinator, registration assistant, results recorder and a cleaner

I imagine this would be one person with, as my dear dead dad used to say, a broomstick up their arse so they could clean as they worked.

inquietant · 16/12/2020 08:26

So your colleague Linda receives a positive result and you are a close contact. No need to self isolate, get the bus or the train to work and use an unreliable test when you get there. No more self isolation for any possibly positive close contacts, presumably?

This is a very good point actually, what a stupid fucking idea Angry

BigWoollyJumpers · 16/12/2020 08:30

They ran pilots in Liverpool and other schools in North West, how were those administered?

EndoplasmicReticulum · 16/12/2020 08:30

When I heard the headline yesterday I was all for it. Mass testing is, after all, one of the things we've been asking for. This is not mass testing. This is about avoiding isolating to make the attendance figures look better.

ItRubsTheLotionOnItsSkin · 16/12/2020 08:30

For any school staff here, what do you think would be the best ways for parents to show their support to their schools flagging up the issues?

Obviously I can write to my MP and make sure everyone I speak to is aware of the full facts behind the headlines (although I'm not on social media apart from MN).

Obviously I can raise awareness of the actual "strategy" as much as I can, but how else could we best help the school in actual practical ways?

peridito · 16/12/2020 08:31

not brain surgery etc

my son ( TA in autistic provision in Academy primary school east London borough )came home with a test kit last night .

Instructions include

open the mouth wide and gently rub the swab’s fabric tip over both tonsils at the back of the throat for 10 seconds

and

Do not touch your tongue, teeth, cheeks, gums, or any other surfaces with the fabric tip of the swab. If it touches anything else, it may spoil your sample

Interestingly there are different instructions without the 2 quotes above for swabs from care staff and
"How to take a combined throat and nose swab (postal version)"

but it doesn't sound easy!

OpheliasCrayon · 16/12/2020 08:32

@ItRubsTheLotionOnItsSkin

For any school staff here, what do you think would be the best ways for parents to show their support to their schools flagging up the issues?

Obviously I can write to my MP and make sure everyone I speak to is aware of the full facts behind the headlines (although I'm not on social media apart from MN).

Obviously I can raise awareness of the actual "strategy" as much as I can, but how else could we best help the school in actual practical ways?

I'm not sure but thanks for the support. If you wanted to write to your MPs just add in any comments that we have raised plus your own thoughts.

For any sceptics ... This is real. We are burnt out. We are at risk and we cannot do this too.

RedToothBrush · 16/12/2020 08:33

Oh God don't even joke about it, we know the DFE are lurking on here, they'll think parents actually like and support the idea.

The DFE are now cackling away knowing that when they send the letter to Finlay's Mum it will read something like this:

"We understand you may not be thrilled at the prospect of Kevin's Mum testing young Finlay, however its either that or lovely Kevin himself doing it. Or no testing. Your choice."

I do apologise.