The government wants YOU to volunteer as a school covid tester

[noelgiraffe]

The govt have proudly announced that there will be mass testing in secondary schools, colleges and special schools from January.

What the headlines don’t quite convey is that schools will be expected to set up and man their own testing centres and that this make-shift testing of close contacts of positives will replace close contacts having to isolate. The tests pick up about 50% of positive cases so I’m sure this will be fine.

Covidy kids will be getting the bus to school to queue up and be tested by people who have watched a video and a couple of online worksheets.

Even better, they want those people to be YOU!

“The document says that reasonable costs for additional workforce will be reimbursed.

It adds that a school may want to hire temporary staff, such as agency and contract workers, or draw on volunteers such as parents, retired teachers, Red Cross, St John Ambulance and community organisations.”

If you can’t help in person, perhaps you can support by talking positively about this effort on social media and parenting forums?

“Under a section labelled “social media guidance”, the document reads that “consistent, accurate and positive communication about testing activity is essential”.

They want to see “proactive public social media using agreed materials” and schools are encouraged to “monitor your existing social media channels, parents forums etc. and provide any feedback”.”

Come on folks, do your bit!

schoolsweek.co.uk/7-staff-roles-2-hour-training-and-dhsc-sign-off-on-press-schools-given-mass-testing-instructions/

@StaffAssociationRepresentative

A few of my Year 13s believe the vaccine will be a cause of infertility and spark the end of the human race.

Isn't that the plot to a film

Can't remember the name

@Truelymadlydeeplysomeonesmum

a few months ago heard this from son. I said, "well, it is a form of population control, at least there will be less humans" (in a lighthearted tone)
He said, nature has already taken care of that because new generations are more aware and won't limit their sexual choices for the purpose of mating.
He has a point, and I'm not sure that it is that bad...

I'd love to hear your y13's view on this

If the test is only 50% accurate schools can save themselves a lot of time by randomly sending half of the close contacts home.

If teachers are close contacts they have to follow the same (dangerous) test-instead-of-isolate procedure.

dfemedia.blog.gov.uk/2020/12/15/mass-testing-in-schools-your-questions-answered/

Does that only apply to school or can they go to the pub of an evening if in tier 1 or 2? (don't be daft, teachers never have time to go to the pub, but you know what I mean).

@Takethereigns

If the test is only 50% accurate schools can save themselves a lot of time by randomly sending half of the close contacts home.

Tbf, that is currently PHE policy.

My Y9 dd was instructed to self-isolate last week along with half of her class.

Two of the children not sent home were kept off school and taken for tests by their parents. Neither had symptoms and both were positive.

@EndoplasmicReticulum

If teachers are close contacts they have to follow the same (dangerous) test-instead-of-isolate procedure.

dfemedia.blog.gov.uk/2020/12/15/mass-testing-in-schools-your-questions-answered/

Does that only apply to school or can they go to the pub of an evening if in tier 1 or 2? (don't be daft, teachers never have time to go to the pub, but you know what I mean).

I want to know this. Also the students, are they just allowed at school or are they free to do what they like in the evening - scouts, football practise, dance, shopping?

I also think we could end up with more isolation not less. Say Bill tests positive, his 15 close contacts are identified and report for testing each morning - a couple of days later Adam and Susie test positive, they each have another 15 positives. So now 43 people are being tested each morning. The next day there's another 2 positives - and 71 people need testing. This isn't possible with the resources available so they all get sent home to isolate...

You're right Figgy - it's going to spiral isn't it.
Unless they're hoping that Kevin's mum is so crap at administering tests that nobody tests positive at all.

Unless they're hoping that Kevin's mum is so crap at administering tests that nobody tests positive at all

Sshhh - we're not meant to mention that bit

He said, nature has already taken care of that because new generations are more aware and won't limit their sexual choices for the purpose of mating

What does he mean? I didn't limit my sexual choices for the purpose of mating - I don't get it. Possibly thick from tiredness.

That's right - exponential growth who needs to be tested - within a fortnight we could have the whole school needing to be tested - no time for lessons just one endless cycle of testing.

@FuckeryOmbudsman

Unless they're hoping that Kevin's mum is so crap at administering tests that nobody tests positive at all

Sshhh - we're not meant to mention that bit

The DfE propaganda unit will swing into action and every news outlet will be issued a series of highly clinical looking settings with a lone kid being enthusiastically tested by a team of nurses in full PPE.

The picture of a dishevelled and knackered Kevin’s mum trying to put a wriggly Y9 in a headlock while a crowd gathers will be airbrushed from the record.

Why can't kids do it home themselves? Nhs staff have to do it twice a week and log the results etc. I know not all families would but if the result isn't logged the kid gets sent home? A few days of messing it up and the parent would be on it as won't want them at home!

@TheHoneyBadger

He said, nature has already taken care of that because new generations are more aware and won't limit their sexual choices for the purpose of mating

What does he mean? I didn't limit my sexual choices for the purpose of mating - I don't get it. Possibly thick from tiredness.

take it lightheartedly. With all the lmbtqksudyf+++ communities sex is soooo less about actual reproduction to that generation that this in itself will limit how many offspring this generation will have. I actually think he is right on the outcome, but probably flawed on the logic part. Given it was lh we didn't pursue further :)

@EndoplasmicReticulum

If teachers are close contacts they have to follow the same (dangerous) test-instead-of-isolate procedure.

dfemedia.blog.gov.uk/2020/12/15/mass-testing-in-schools-your-questions-answered/

Does that only apply to school or can they go to the pub of an evening if in tier 1 or 2? (don't be daft, teachers never have time to go to the pub, but you know what I mean).

If a teacher or student is testing rather than self-isolating then they do not have to self-isolate at all and can act like anyone else within the restrictions of their tiers despite being close contacts of positive cases.

I really would recommend people (especially those thinking this scheme is a positive and will be a benefit) read this. It's from the BMJ about mass testing with lateral flow tests.

www.bmj.com/content/371/bmj.m4436

This is a example of why I won't volunteer and be complicit in increasing the risk of harm to pupils, staff and their families.

If people don't want to read it all, this is the final paragraph summing it up.

"At a minimum, there should be an immediate pause, until the fundamental building blocks of this mass testing programme have been externally and independently scrutinised by the National Screening Committee and NIHR. In the meantime, nobody’s freedom or behaviour should be made contingent on having had a novel rapid test. It is premature to offer testing as the route to individuals’ release from restrictions. Instead we must heed the advice of the World Health Organization and the government’s Scientific Advisory Group for Emergencies (SAGE), radically improve the woeful performance of the “find, test, trace, and isolate” system, and renew the focus on identifying symptomatic people, especially among those sections of society most at risk. The current approach will open Pandora's box"

new generations are more aware and won't limit their sexual choices for the purpose of mating
New generations always seem to think they invented sex and sexuality and all previous human reproduction happened in a fog of ignorance, entirely by accident. Though weirdly, many younger people appear to deny that sex exists at all, replacing it with a set of gender stereotypes. It all seems very dull. Perhaps the human race will die out after all.

Will they tester be trained and given full PPE?

@ItRubsTheLotionOnItsSkin

I really would recommend people (especially those thinking this scheme is a positive and will be a benefit) read this. It's from the BMJ about mass testing with lateral flow tests.

www.bmj.com/content/371/bmj.m4436

This is a example of why I won't volunteer and be complicit in increasing the risk of harm to pupils, staff and their families.

If people don't want to read it all, this is the final paragraph summing it up.

"At a minimum, there should be an immediate pause, until the fundamental building blocks of this mass testing programme have been externally and independently scrutinised by the National Screening Committee and NIHR. In the meantime, nobody’s freedom or behaviour should be made contingent on having had a novel rapid test. It is premature to offer testing as the route to individuals’ release from restrictions. Instead we must heed the advice of the World Health Organization and the government’s Scientific Advisory Group for Emergencies (SAGE), radically improve the woeful performance of the “find, test, trace, and isolate” system, and renew the focus on identifying symptomatic people, especially among those sections of society most at risk. The current approach will open Pandora's box"

Exactly!! If our government had said these tests will be in addition to the current isolation rules I could be more hopeful. I cannot actually believe they are planning to end the isolation of even close contacts on the strength of these tests. Teachers and parents should refuse to be put in this position. It is crazy and goes against all current medical and scientific advice.

I cant quite believe it 😔.

And yet the general public/half of mumsnet just see free childcare and have a complete cognitive dissonance about the safety in schools or what it is like.

Very important reminder @ItRubsTheLotionOnItsSkin

If lateral flow testing was done alongside SI of closest contacts (to mop up some asymptomatic cases) then I would definitely support it.

Instead of SI - dreadful idea, and far too risky

TheSun I suspected he might have that. Remind him they'll all feel entitled to rent a poor woman's womb when they're done sterilising themselves with alphabet soup and that there are always two ends of the extremes rope in reaction and relation to each. At the other end of that one is religious and social fundamentalists making babies and banning abortions and contraception

@ItRubsTheLotionOnItsSkin

Just a reminder that the government has spent £22 billion pounds on the Test and Trace scheme so far.

And this is the best they can come up with for schools, eight months and £22 billion down the line...

It's shocking in its incompetence.

I think this is just so salient that it needs repeating.

@Namenic

Will they tester be trained and given full PPE?

I very much doubt it.

And, as ever, Dido and her private sector pals pocket loadsmoney, whilst the under-resourced and much criticised public sector does their work for them in addition to their usual excessive workload.