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Original poster

How are people going to make Christmas safe?

66 replies

jinglejanglerumbalows · 07/12/2020 20:59

My DM lives alone. We've only see her outside since March. Although legally she can bubble with us, we've been cautious as we are a risk to her.

I've just had a chat with her and she's almost certain that she won't be visiting us at Xmas. From the start I said the decision was hers, based on how she perceived the risk, and that the DCs and I cannot isolate on the run-up to Xmas. Her decision was made based on a report on a radio show by a doctor about staying 2m apart indoors, no board games, using your own cutlery etc. She thinks she'll just spend the whole time with us worrying, so it's not worth it. I completely respect her choice.

Those of you that are joining together this Xmas, what are you doing to ensure you all stay safe? The fact that we can join with two other households doesn't mean that the risk has reduced. Will you be SD indoors? Keeping all the windows open? My DM may well change her mind when the reality of spending all of Xmas alone sinks in, so I'd appreciate some suggestions of how others plan to deal with it.

OP posts:
OverTheRainbow88 · 08/12/2020 14:51

@Stepstepmother

No because we all have the flu jab

Stradivari · 08/12/2020 14:58

I'm seeing my SIL and her DP and my parents. SIL and DP will be staying at our house, and then we shall drive up to see DPs and stay with them. We don't have any intentions of isolating, taking tests, keeping windows open, camping in the garden etc. We see no difference in our risk to the other times we have met up in the last few months since the end of lockdown 1.

kittensarecute · 08/12/2020 15:29

I shall be spending Christmas in just the same way as I always do and with the people I always spend it with - covid or no covid.

HotPatootiebootie · 08/12/2020 16:26

We've got a 6mx3m gazebo set up in the garden ash year round and it is attached to the house. Normally we have to hot tub set up but thinking about putting it away so we can invite friends around for socially distance drinks etc as we are tier 2 so rule of 6. We have a porta potty and toilet tent from camping so could potentially put that up but not sure how people would feel.

As for Christmas Day I will be bubbling with and seeing my 2 sisters and their children for every day I can. I miss socialising and hugging them although I haven't stopped hugging the kids. I'm a carers and deliver therapy for two of the kids so see them a lot thank fully.

lunar1 · 08/12/2020 16:31

We aren't seeing anyone, we had hoped to as we were all isolating for 14 days before, but DH had his leave cancelled so it's not worth the risk. Gutted, but we have made the right choices since the start and will continue to do so.

Original poster
jinglejanglerumbalows · 08/12/2020 17:47

@Stepstepmother

Bloody hell this thread is insane. Do you all do this every year with vulnerable relatives for flu and norovirus too?
No we don't, but this isn't a normal year, is it? If my DM was planning to visit, and one of us came down with flu or noro, then she's cancel her visit. Plus, we'd all have had our flu jabs by now, anyway. The risk is real. Me or my DCs could easily infect my DM unknowingly as we live in an area with high infection rates, and we will not be isolating prior to Xmas. So I'm not sure why you think the measures described on here are "insane". The risk is very real, so needs to be mitigated as much as possible.
OP posts:
reginafelangee · 08/12/2020 17:53

We will be together with my parents and sibling and her partner - 3 households.

We all work from home and my parents already do childcare for the children. So we already mix, but don't mix with anyone else. So we will crack on and have a pretty normal Christmas.

The only thing that would put a spanner in the works is if any of the children have to self-isolate due to a school contact. We will cross that path if it comes to it.

cologne4711 · 08/12/2020 17:55

@Theotherrudolph

By accepting it isn’t and can’t be “safe” and making decisions accordingly.
This. There is no such thing as "safe".

You may not get covid but you may get the flu. You may not get the flu, but you may trip on the stairs. You may not trip on the stairs but you may burn your fingers getting the turkey out of the oven. Etc etc.

Is your mum particularly vulnerable?

PinkSparklyPussyCat · 08/12/2020 17:56

It'll be just the two of us at Christmas, we don't have the room to socially distance and I'm certainly not sitting indoors with the window open in December!

@Stepstepmother, no we wouldn't normally do anything special for flu or noro and I don't have a flu jab either. We're being led my family on this one.

Chimeraforce · 08/12/2020 18:03

We can't. I'm seeing my mates (1 x couple), 3 in laws and my mum on different days. I'm sick of being told what to do and am excited to see them. We will enjoy it... Except the inlaw bit. They are elderly but insist on us meeting up... I won't allow one of them over our threshold so has to be pub.

IceCreamAndCandyfloss · 08/12/2020 18:07

@Theotherrudolph

By accepting it isn’t and can’t be “safe” and making decisions accordingly.
This ^^.

All this talk of covid safe or covid secure is pretty pointless.

Safest thing is staying within households and not allowing further spread.

Chevron123 · 08/12/2020 18:11

My kids will be coming out of school on the 11th so that we can feel safer seeing grandparents on Christmas Day. As far as school is concerned they will be isolating - although given the rising number of cases locally they may have been sent home by then.

VanCleefArpels · 08/12/2020 18:51

@Stepstepmother

Bloody hell this thread is insane. Do you all do this every year with vulnerable relatives for flu and norovirus too?
My parents dad Jess likely to die of Niro virus a day they are vaccinated against flu so no it doesn’t form part of the decision making process usually. But Covid likely to kill one of them at least and the risk of being asymptomatic carriers makes it not worth seeing them so soon before they will be called up for the vaccine. It’s only a roast dinner, a tub of Roses and a few board games. I’d rather they be around for another 5 Christmasses
VanCleefArpels · 08/12/2020 18:53

God so many typos 🙄

Should be “my parents are far less likely to die of norovirus and they are vaccinated against flu “

unchienandalusia · 08/12/2020 18:57

@VanCleefArpels no one, not one vulnerable group, are "likely to die from covid".

Of course there is a risk but ya not more than 50%. Far les in fact.

How you interpret that risk and what steps you take are of course your and you families decisions. But let's get the facts straight first.

We are seeing DM her partner and brother. All over 70. Some health issues. We will keep our distance as best we can abs wash our hands etc. But mainly we aren't going to see anyone else for the 2 weeks prior apart from some socially distanced mountain biking and walking. All outside.

Cripesitsthegasman19 · 08/12/2020 19:02

We're bubbled with my mum so will be spending it with her. She just can't cope with being on her own.

Original poster
jinglejanglerumbalows · 08/12/2020 19:13

@cologne4711 she's a high risk of becoming very unwell if she caught COVID. I can't really compare the risk of that to the risk of her falling down the stairs...

OP posts:
WanderingMilly · 08/12/2020 19:16

I shall do exactly the same as I've been doing all along. I see close relatives, outside for a walk mostly. Been seeing them anyway, will still see them. No-one else so can't see the issue. Who are these people who have so many relatives that they can't cram them all into 5 days on the trot?

Safe? Well, for a start I won't be at work (non-teaching role in a school but no PPE and no social distancing), I seem to be the only one bothered by it, no-one else cares. I will be a lot safer because I'll be on holiday.

Shops....well, I wear a mask indoors and out, and gloves, seems perfectly fine to me so I shall go off to the shops as usual, just as I have been doing.

Not much different really!

VanCleefArpels · 08/12/2020 19:27

@unchienandalusia with severely compromised lung function and in her late 70’s I think my mum’s chances of fighting it off are pretty poor. And even at 50% risk that’s one hell of a roll of a dice for the sake of a roast dinner.

Aprilrainbow · 08/12/2020 19:29

Many of the elderly are not playing with a full deck, don't let them give you Long Covid.

movingonup20 · 08/12/2020 19:31

We aren't going to meet up indoors - going for a walk between Christmas and new year

Northernsoullover · 08/12/2020 19:40

We are going to visit my parents and sit in separate rooms (knocked through) we will wear masks until the food is on the fork and ventilate like crazy! To be honest I'd sooner not go but they really are desperate to see us.
The children are finishing school/college early too. I'm working but not in close contact with people and won't be seeing friends.

foodtoorder · 08/12/2020 19:45

I think my family is probably a rare exception in that we are as safe as we can be. Two families 3!primary children between us but all four adults work in health care and lucky enough to have the whole of Xmas day off. We all have to self test at home twice a week for our work so if no one is positive on testing that week we are going for it.

CrownAddict · 08/12/2020 19:51

Completely torn. Teen at school till 18th. Elderly parent lives alone long way away, due to visit for 8 days on 19th. I visit her anyway and take the risk of living with achool-aged child and not isolating for two weeks before.I visit. She wants to come. I vacillate between thinking it's a risk worth taking plus her mental health is poor.including getting very depressed late summer (I note many elderly people proudly staying at home in the media do not live alone,), and I will feel so awful if she doesn't come, versus don't be stupid, vaccine within her grasp... Me and sibling talked tonight and cannot decide. As it stands she's coming and we take the risk but...

flowerycurtain · 08/12/2020 19:53

In laws will come over to the garden and have a glass of champagne whilst kids open their gifts from them.

We're not a huffy family.
I'd rather they didn't come. They want a full on Xmas and this is our compromise

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