Positive.. just crack on

[notroundthebend]

I think I know the answer but I'm keen to see how others have coped. I got a positive result earlier this week, it's been a real awful virus so far and I've got two under 10 at home with me. No help whatsoever.. H maintains it's just a cold crack on. So I've have had to do so.. despite not feeling my best! I may be feeling sorry for myself here but how have others coped? He's refused to isolate, runs his own business so off out the door daily (locked in his office alone apparently only doing zoom calls).. he could be here helping me but he's not. In fact last night when he did come home, poured himself a glass of red, sat down on the sofa with his iPad waiting for his tea to be served.. no fucks given 🤷‍♀️

@MrsTerryPratchett

Lick his toothbrush.

Then report him.

Twat.

🤣🤣🤣 100%

If the children are over 5, I think you should go to bed. I would tell him when he got back that he needs to look after you and the children and that if he left the house again you would be reporting him to the police, he can work from home ! I would also be preparing to end the relationship. He made vows.
He may well get sick himself in the next few days, in that case, I would make sure he had water, but that would be it.

Seriously why are you with him? He obviously doesn’t give a crap about you?

ImMoana,
Really? I wonder why this hasn't happened with everyone.
We each had separate phone calls, every 3 days of our isolation period of 14 days.
I thought this was something everyone had

That is just so selfish. My sister-in-law is positive and feels drained, but she said my brother and their son are being brilliant, doing everything between them and letting her rest. That's as it should be.

I wouldn't want to stay with him. I had covid (I'm fairly sure but not had test) in March at the start of lockdown, my dh was working from home, looking after the kids and preparing all the meals. I isolated away from him and the kids and stayed in my room for a week. None of us left the house, because that's the rule!
In normal times he does his fair share around the house.
I'd definitely report him if I were you, what a dick.

Don't mean to be rude, but I'd say he can fuck right off.
I bet if he had it it'd be totally different and he'd be lazing about while you still do the running around. How nasty of him to not help you at all!!
And he clearly shouldn't be going out. Sounds selfish all round to me.

It would be the end for me, he clearly doesn't care about you I am so sorry

I really hope you feel better soon and can get everything sorted for a happy future.

Work through? Crack on? Just a cold?

I got it and I was horribly ill (confined to bed, hallucinating, wheezing and not eating) for 6 days. I could scarcely entertain going for a piss and didn't brush my teeth for 4 days.

I'm still not over it and feel slightly traumatised by the experience. Luckily my DH was around to bring fluids and medication, called an ambulance when my breathing got bad, and he has had to take 2 weeks off work himself. Your DH needs to open his fucking eyes.

I hope you're feeling reasonably OK and don't deteriorate.

He should be isolating. According to the guidance you should be isolated from husband and kids within the house. I'm not saying that to guilt trip you just as further evidence of how crap husband is being. I had coronavirus and spent a week in my bedroom away from husband (we don't have kids) doing nothing more strenuous than watching Netflix on my laptop and I was still knackered for about 4 weeks. Your husband needs to pull his socks up.

He is being a selfish dick why can’t he work from home
I have just heard of someone who has carried on working despite his wife being ill and getting a positive result Not only is he working but working with others putting them at risk. He only announced it today he has been working with my SIL thus putting my daughter at risk she is type 1 diabetic I could cheerfully strangle him

He should be reported for breaking isolation rules and hopefully fined that might sort him out. They say people show their true colours when the chips are down, I think your DH has shown who he is.

When I was positive, Dh did everything. I was out of it, either in bed or stuck in an armchair. I had a hard time getting off the chair so was no use to anyone.
Go to bed, lick his toothbrush and cough on him. Tell him you are too ill the kids and their needs for food and looking after are his for the forseable.

This is pretty unforgivable in my book. I would be wondering what kind of future we would have after this.

Stop cooking, washing and all housework. Feed yourself and the children before he comes home, then curl up in bed with them and watch a film and let him sort himself out. What a selfish, horrible man he is. When you are better you can consider whether you want to stay him.

I'd be asking him if his wedding vows meant fuck all to him. "In sickness and in health" means he looks after you when you are Ill.

Is he so cavalier with the other vows too?

And that's before we even get to the fact that he is leaving the house knowingly with a positive case in the home.

I personally wonder if this is why more women get long covid because we keep on looking after kids.
I was ill in apr and could hardly read bedtime stories etc and had to help dc with school work .i could hardly make dc work as they were resistant and if i raised my voice at all it felt really odd. And heart beat fast etc.

Simple - don’t cook for him, don’t do his washing or anything whatsoever for him. Plus, if it was me, and he’s such a selfish test, report him for not isolating, it’s a crime and he could be fined.

Thanks all, your only confirming what I've already thought in my head already. Sadly the virus was passed onto me by him. He was sick last week, I asked him over and over to get a test.. he kept saying it was just a cold. No point and not interested in T&T too busy with work.. always fecking is! Then I started feeling poorly Monday. I kept the kids off and started back homeschooling. I know he's wrong to leave the house and not think of others, I know he's selfish and this is the last straw for me. I'm not well enough to do much just yet.. but it's certainly made my decision to leave much clearer.

T&T have phoned both me and DP separately every other day to ensure we understand and are following isolation rules. Those calls are recorded.

Christ, do they really do this?

OP your DH is a selfish, self-centred prick. I can't add much more than what PP have said but I certainly couldn't put up with that behaviour.

Oh I think you started a thread about him at the time didnt you?

@BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz me? No.. wouldn't waste my time

This is awful on every which level.

He sounds incredibly selfish and self centred.

It makes me sad to think you're not getting the help, support and TLC that you deserve - you are worth so much more than this OP.

Wishing you a speedy recovery

I'm afraid your not alone in this. We both work from home and have to school aged children. We had to continue working and the kids when we felt unwell.

It's a nightmare but feed the kids anything that's to hand. Go to bed early and crack on.

Your DH should be isolating but a self employed person I get why he might need to go to work. He won't be alone in this and if his business is at risk and therefore your income I can see why he's going to work. It's far from ideal.

I wouldn't be cooking his dinner btw, I'd be leaving a tin of beans on the counter and tell hr to get on with it!

Rest, get well. Then look round for a shit-hot divorce lawyer. Only when you've made plans with him tell the selfish, miserable bastard his time's up. And good luck!