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Covid

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Original poster

Uni students coming home for lockdown

125 replies

Chocolatecake12 · 02/11/2020 19:21

As title says..... my ds is saying he wants to come home. His girlfriend came home yesterday, (different uni) and another friend came home today.
Out of his flat mates (Halls) only one out of 5 is going home.
I’m in two minds - id love him to come home, I miss him etc but I also feel he should stay until Christmas as government are advising.
He currently has two online lectures and two face to face. One if those is practical hands on.
He hadn’t had any advice yet from the university.

What are people’s thoughts? I’m not sure I’m Capable of seeing Things clearly right now!

OP posts:

Baaaahhhhh · 02/11/2020 23:01

On a related note, all the youngsters currently flat sharing in London are all going home again. They don't want to be left alone in a flat with no-one to see and nothing to do, and often with no room for wfh.

MaidEdithofAragon · 02/11/2020 23:02

My DD has come home for lockdown. Everyone in her houseshare of 5 people has left and gone home. Everything is online so she can study here. I don't want her there by herself. Her uni have sent a slightly menacing email saying going home is illegal. Bollocks to that. She's here and not going out or mixing with anyone apart from us.

Torvean32 · 02/11/2020 23:20

I don't feel students should be going home. NS has advised ppl in Scotland not to travel to England, and ppl in England should only enter Scotland if its for work or care.
Students moving caused a massive disruption in September. Under 2 months later some have gone home and then probably some will want to travel again in December.

I went to uni in the 90s when ppl got sick, or there was an outbreak in halls nobody rushed home to their parents. It's like their parents are still coddling them instead of teaching them to stand on their own two feet.

Nothingoriginalhere · 03/11/2020 07:58

went to uni in the 90s when ppl got sick, or there was an outbreak in halls nobody rushed home to their parents. It's like their parents are still coddling them instead of teaching them to stand on their own two feet.
luckily we have moved in 30 yrs. I was a student nurse in the 90s and there is no comparison to whats happening now for students!
I'm picking up my dd later today to come home for lockdown. After arriving in her uni city on the 12th September, spending 2 weeks with no flatmates, having to isolate several times once herc3 flatmates arrived, not one single f2f contact on her course, her specific library being shut due to inadequate ventilation and having had no opportunity to meet a single person f2f from her course - why wouldn't she come home?
Alll freshers was cancelled other than zoom, all f2f lectures, all f2f introductions cancelled, absolutely no reason she cannot come home and continue her course here. No way would I stop her coming home, It's been difficult for her.

MyPersona · 03/11/2020 08:21

They need to stay put. It’s isn’t just ‘the rules’, it’s what makes sense for containment. To do otherwise is spectacularly stupid. Also they are adults and better off with their peers and getting on with their work than back home surrounded by helicopter parents.

Noideawottodo · 03/11/2020 08:27

I'm not in this position, but if my dd was going to be the only one in her flat, and was unable to mix with other real life human beings, of course I'd fetch her home! Absolute no-brainer!

BigSandyBalls2015 · 03/11/2020 08:32

Unless they are really struggling it seems madness for students to be heading home ... all that movement and potential spread!

DD is in her second year and staying put. She’d rather be in lockdown with her mates than with mum and dad and I get that. She’s lucky that she has a few hours a week face to face, not all online.

Having said that, I appreciate its rather different for first year students who haven’t necessarily found their tribe.

Nothingoriginalhere · 03/11/2020 08:33

@MyPersona

My dd will be able to work far better at home than being woken up by police banging on the door at 3am bringing home a blind drunk flatmate ( possibly high also) the night before her very first online course exam.

I imagine those saying they wouldn't allow dc home are those without current 18 year olds and have no idea of the difficulties this age group have faced this year.

Covidasaurus · 03/11/2020 08:33

My DD wants to come home but she will just stay in her room and do nothing, potentially until January or longer. We are encouraging her to stay in her house share: learning social and coping skills with her peers during this time is a much better use of her time and money IMO.

bathsh3ba · 03/11/2020 08:36

I'm a PhD student and doing face to face teaching at my uni. Today I am travelling in to give a 'blended' 4 hour teaching session to 2 people in person and 8 via Zoom. The 2 people in person are really struggling and need the face to face for their sanity. Some students 'opting' for the virtual are taking the lazy option and others are genuinely terrified. We are in a low incidence area where the rate of case growth is falling, both on campus and in the city. Students are all reacting differently.

On my campus lectures are online but all students get 4 hours face to face a week. For some it's something they rely on to keep them going. Lectures/seminars have always been optional on our courses, in the sense that no-one enforces attendance, but those who don't attend tend to do worse. We take a register for track and trace but don't chase those who don't attend.

My kids are younger, but if they wanted to come home, I don't think I'd ever refuse them but I would say they had to quarantine for two weeks.

mumsneedwine · 03/11/2020 08:48

I'm currently in a building with over 2,000 people. No one is socially distancing, v few masks, no testing and this is deemed safe. If my kids want to come home, they will. How are they more unsafe than me being here all day ?
Going to see DD tomorrow on a day off as she has just come out of isolation for 14 days and I want to see her before lockdown as she wants to stay at Uni and make the best of it. But so far no f2f as only one thing a week and she couldn't go due to isolation. She has been there 6 weeks and not set foot on campus. She's a vet student.

cologne4711 · 03/11/2020 08:58

I think if he is receiving face to face tuition then he should stay. However, my concern would be that that might not last.

At the moment he can come back - on Thursday he may not be able to anymore, even if the university stops everything.

cologne4711 · 03/11/2020 09:00

Her uni have sent a slightly menacing email saying going home is illegal

Not true, and may not even be true on Thursday.

Bouledeneige · 03/11/2020 09:02

My two SC are staying put. It's more sociable for them and they can more easily to their college work. I would encourage him to stay but if he insists let him come back.

movingonup20 · 03/11/2020 09:13

I asked mine, they are both staying put

movingonup20 · 03/11/2020 09:16

@Roselilly36

Don't scaremonger, if needed you have been able to travel for care reasons and a young person struggling needs care. During lockdown 1 I went to help out my dd several times and nobody questioned me

movingonup20 · 03/11/2020 09:19

My dd hasn't had a single in person session yet, the library is restricted so fully booked for the term consequently she never leaves her room except to shop

Comefromaway · 03/11/2020 09:21

My daughter is staying as her college is fully face to face. She will be visiting for regular medical appointments though (I assume having to travel for medical appointments supercedes not coming home) as she has forthcoming dental surgery.

Goingdooolally · 03/11/2020 09:32

@Torvean32

I don't feel students should be going home. NS has advised ppl in Scotland not to travel to England, and ppl in England should only enter Scotland if its for work or care. Students moving caused a massive disruption in September. Under 2 months later some have gone home and then probably some will want to travel again in December.

I agree in many ways but it is so harsh for many of them at the moment. Mental health/suicides are a huge worry for us parents of first years (barely 18) far from home. My son is stuck in his room all day. Many of his flatmates are going home.

sirfredfredgeorge · 03/11/2020 09:48

They are not in jail

No, but they are in different households, so have the same laws as everyone else.

sirfredfredgeorge · 03/11/2020 09:52

Her uni have sent a slightly menacing email saying going home is illegal

Not true, and may not even be true on Thursday

It might be true today, it would depend on the location of the university and the set up of the students household, we obviously do not know the law for Thursday.

mumsneedwine · 03/11/2020 09:56

No one answered my question. How is me being with 2,000 people daily with no masks, social distancing or testing less dangerous than my own 2 kids coming home. Both of whom have both been staying in household groups and can get tested whenever they want.
Stupid rules lead to people making decisions that make sense to them. This is my DD's home. Not a flat with people she's known 6 weeks.

Dustysilkflowers · 03/11/2020 10:02

@sirfredfredgeorge

They are not in jail

No, but they are in different households, so have the same laws as everyone else.

Well not all live in shared apartments like Friends having a blast. Some are in blocks with a single box room to live in who are already having mental health problems.

My friends son is in a tiny box room by himself. He can’t do his lectures. His is skint as can’t work in the job he had lined up. He wants to give his place up and just come home. He can’t do his course on line and has one class in person a week. If he hasn’t thrown the towel in by Christmas he will come home then and not go back. And I don’t blame him. Lots of students are feeling like this and many have already come home. The only reason he hasn’t come back already is that his mother is a career in an elderly care home so I think he is planning to isolate for two weeks then come back.

And I really don’t blame him. This is unacceptable.

Goingdooolally · 03/11/2020 10:09

@mumsneedwine

No one answered my question. How is me being with 2,000 people daily with no masks, social distancing or testing less dangerous than my own 2 kids coming home. Both of whom have both been staying in household groups and can get tested whenever they want. Stupid rules lead to people making decisions that make sense to them. This is my DD's home. Not a flat with people she's known 6 weeks.

Its not that it’s less dangerous, it’s about reducing the overall risk.

I’m a teacher too (I’m assuming that’s what you are) with a son in first year at university so am in the same boat as you. We’ll bring him back if we need to and mitigate the risk as much as we can. We think he’s had it already anyway as all his flatmates have.

Goingdooolally · 03/11/2020 10:10

@Dustysilkflowers that’s shit. Poor kid. Hope it works out for him.

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