Covid childcare bubble

[Babymumma89]

I recently gave birth (sep 20) and I'm struggling to look after my her on my own while my fiance is at work. Can I make a childcare bubble with my mum to help care for her? This allows me to sleep and catch up on house work while her grandma is looking after her. We're going into tier 3 and I'm just worried that I shouldn't have this bubble?

Op I would absolutely have my mum round if I was in your situation

I suppose it depends how you interpret it. If you need childcare.
My parents pick up my 13 and 11 year old after school a couple of nights a week. However we didn't 'need childcare' over half term, so they didn't have them.
If you are on maternity leave you're unlikely to need childcare to allow you to work, but I'd argue needing a break is valid.
Although I do think the father should be doing more as a pp says.

Do you ever need to provide proof of a support or childcare bubble, and if so, in what scenario would you need to and how would you do this?

I believe from the guidelines you can only bubble up once in either a support or childcare bubble, but this must be almost impossible to police. Is it just done on goodwill like mask wearing?

The guidelines on tier 3 don't actually mention needing childcare to go to work. It just says:

people

A childcare bubble is where someone in one household provides informal (unpaid and unregistered) childcare to a child aged 13 or under in another household. This must always be between the same 2 households.

Friends or family who do not live with you and are not part of a support or childcare bubble must not visit your home to help with childcare. Childcare bubbles are to be used to provide childcare only, and not for the purposes of different households mixing where they are otherwise not allowed to do so.

@Watermelon999 I use multiple family members for childcare, nobody polices it. It's necessary for me as a single parent so I can work, I don't feel guilt about it.

This is yet another way the rules shockingly overlook the need for human contact. PND or not most mums quite rightly need a bit of support and this isn’t ‘allowed’ because it’s not ‘childcare’. Ridiculous. If your mum is happy I would definitely have her over to help. I would do it and I would encourage any of my friends to break the rules for this. I suppose this is what happens when the rules are made by a load of blokes who don’t have a clue about real life.

Who says it's not allowed because it's not childcare

Did you se what Tyranttoddler posted?
Ca anyone see anyone else's posts on this thread (apart from the small part of mine that was cherry picked to represent me as saying the opposite of what I'd said)?

What @jblue2018 said. I would definitely do it. My husband is self employed and couldn’t have much time off work when dd was born. My mum was absolutely invaluable.

The rules stated further down do NOT say childcare is for work purposes.

Go for it OP. Wish I knew this was possible when DD was shiny and new. She's three and a half months now and we've muddled along, but now I realise how normal (in non covid times) it is for parents and in laws and friends to lend a helping hand in the early days. If your DM is up for it then crack on. FWIW DH still does most of the housework and I get very little done besides looking after DD in the daytime. Something has to give and we can't do everything at the minute.

Do it, I did in the first lock down when I had my baby in march and my husband went back to work on nights. It was illegal then but I honestly don't know how I would have survived otherwise.

I’m tier 3 too and my baby is 3 months old. I have 2 other young children too (under 3!) and I’ve got no support apart from my husband who works long hours. It’s honestly horrendous, isolating and so hard. I no longer recognise myself and feel like a shit mum even though I try my very best every day. My close family are all vulnerable health wise and we are in tier 3. If you can access help OP, go for it xx black lives matter protests still going on round here, hundreds all together unchallenged by the police and I can’t even see my mum. So so unfair xx

I would do it. I don't have this option as we have no grandparents nearby, and with DC 2 on the way and DH out the house 7-6 Mon-Fri, it's going to be tough. I'd give anything for an extra pair of hands, so if you've got the chance definitely do it.

Yes, you can bubble with your mum. Although I think the idea would be that you left your baby at say her house & didn’t stay. My parents look after my DD (7 months) but I do drop her at the door and come back home/go shopping or whatever I need to do. My mum has come to our house on a couple occasions & we maintain a distance. She is vulnerable though so I’m quite anxious.

This thread is infuriating.

Am wondering about this too OP, I have a 4 year old, 18 month old and 2 week old baby and my Mum was going to come and stay next week when DH is back at work. I am genuinely struggling with all of them and cried when I thought she wouldn’t be able to come!

@RoseGoldEagle in your case I would definitely have your mum to stay, sometimes you just need some help.

Since March you're allowed to provide care for someone who needs it. I think that your situation warrants this. Obviously don't take the piss and have a party but if you need someone to look after baby while you have a few hours sleep then go for it.

I'm assuming that your mum isn't socialising with other households

I think that sounds like a very sensible situation to use the bubble. And yes whilst your mother is in the house absolutely no reason you can't socialise talk to her. People have to be realistic about this my mother is my childcare and I'm hardly going to shun her when I pick my daughter up, she lives alone and was pretty broken by the last lockdown when we didn't see her at all