Elderly parents shielding since March and getting depressed

[Ozzie9523]

My parents have been shielding since March - dad (79) has COPD, asthma, diabetes and heart problems, mum (80) has diabetes, asthma and is generally unwell a lot. They are both getting depressed now, apart from a few summer walks they have literally not left their house since March. Both terrified at the prospect of catching Covid as they feel they wouldn’t survive it. I’m so torn as to what to advise them to do (I don’t feel I even can) - on the one hand I’m terrified of them going out and catching it, on the other hand I’m starting to think they should try and take ‘baby steps’ and maybe go out to quiet places for coffee or lunch. They are in a Tier 2 area. Every time I speak to my mum she’s tearful. I visited in the summer each week and sat on the other side of the garden to chat, we can’t do that now because of the weather and they don’t want me in the house. I have school aged children and don’t want to put them at risk. I’m an only child so all they have really. I know there are many people still in this situation and at least they have each other. I just feel really sad for them having to possibly live like this for another 6 months or more, or even for the rest of their lives.

I'm in a similar boat, with parents who have been shielding since March. It's getting harder for them, but like yours they are more fearful at going out. I've not got a lot to add, just sympathies.

I am trying to get mine to go out for drives, Costa drive through, dragged them out for a socially distanced walk.

Netflix, google home, finally got them set up and using online banking, desperately trying to get them back to having some form of independence - as it gives them choice and purpose.

It's not an easy one

I'm still shielding and it's hard. Is there anywhere locally they can get out for a walk when it's dry? The only thing I've really done is a drive through or grabbed a coffee and then drank it elsewhere

Another problem is neither of them are particularly mobile, they both struggle to walk, their summer walks were literally to the end of their road. Mum isn’t a very positive person at the best of times and I think she’s probably dragging my dad down.

That's very sad. I am worried about my own elderly parents who both have health conditions although they are not shielding (I don't blame them for not wanting to and they feel it's a waste of the time they have left, but even though they say they are careful I'm worried). I'm an only child and working/traveling on public transport so feel we pose a danger to them.

Everything they love has been taken away or become difficult or a miserable experience - church, choir, eating in cafés with friends, chatting to others. It's not what I want for them at their time of life.

They are also miles away. Seeing elderly people wresting with walking aids and bags and spectacles and bloody masks is horrible to see.