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Original poster

Really struggling to care for my baby while having covid

49 replies

HL123 · 25/10/2020 19:01

I tested positive 6 days ago and have progressively been feeling worse. I'm a single mum to a 4 month old, and I'm just so exhausted with getting up in the night to feed her and generally caring for her while trying to get better - I don't feel my body is getting a chance to recover.
I feel so stuck as no one can help care for her in case she has it and passes it on (thankfully she isn't showing any symptoms but not worth the risk to others).
I guess I'm just posting to vent, as I know there aren't really any options for me that could help, but feeling very down about it this evening.

OP posts:
Wherearefoxssocks · 25/10/2020 21:18

You poor thing what a nightmare. As PP have said, now is not the time to try and do too much. Ready meals, pre made bottles (if baby is ff), as little housework as possible. It won't do baby any harm if you leave her in the same babygro all day, or if you don't bath her for a couple of days. You have the benefit that as she is only 4 months she isn't on the move. Would she be happy enough if you lay her on a playmat with a few toys while you lie on the sofa?

I hope you feel better very soon

Augustbreeze · 25/10/2020 21:25

@Sandyjag

I’m not sure it is ‘very likely’ your daughter has contracted covid. Transmission is far from 100% and was even as low as 14% in one study in married couples I believe. You need help. Doctors and nurses work with people with covid, they’re not just left to fend because they have it. So there is a level where the appropriate person could help you at home, whether that’s a carer, a health visitor, a friend or whoever. I hope someone can provide the correct info on this. Your Gp should be ashamed saying you have to cope alone. I hope you can find a better source of info and some help. The above ideas sound good with meals and baby walks but if you need more help than that you must be able to get it. Sending strength.
I completely agree with all of this.

I think you need to ask for help, there's real risks here, what if you ended up with long Covid, how would you care for your baby then?

Maybe your best friend could come and then isolate for two weeks before seeing her stepdad??

Porcupineinwaiting · 25/10/2020 21:34

Accept what help you can and rest as much as you can. If it gets to the point where you can't, if your sickness worsens, use 111 and ask for the paramedics to come and assess you. If you should need to be hospitalized because you are too ill to look after yourself, provision will be made for your dd in hospital (possibly not with you but on a children's ward ). That help is there if you need it (hopefully you wont).

tootiredtothinkofanewname · 25/10/2020 21:41

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Doyouavocado · 25/10/2020 21:49

Poor you, this sounds awful.If I was your mum I would 1million percent be helping you regardless.

londongirl12 · 25/10/2020 22:08

@HL123

My best friend has offered to come and help however her step dad is in the vulnerable category and not well, so I just wouldn't feel comfortable with that, as much as I appreciate her offer.
Could she do things like do your washing? It'll help you and she doesn't need to be in contact. Take all the help you can! Daffodil
BumbleFlump · 25/10/2020 22:21

That’s crappy OP, being ill when you’re a single mum is tough - I was in bed with flu once for at least a week once, my kids were about 6 and 8 at the time I remember dragging myself down stairs to feed them and they literally watched telly the whole time. It must be way worse with a baby
although trust me better a baby than a toddler!

Do the bare minimum, cleaning etc can wait. Go to bed/rest whenever your little one sleeps also make sure you’re drinking lots of water, especially if you’re breastfeeding.

Hope you’re better soon x

TheAdventuresoftheWishingChair · 25/10/2020 22:32

You poor thing. It sounds exhausting. Take things an hour at a time and do whatever you can to help yourself through it. I know I'm just a stranger on the internet but I will be thinking of you.

Sb2012 · 25/10/2020 22:37

What area are you in? I don’t want to sound rude and I’m sorry if I offend you, but I can help with simple things like collecting shopping or getting you baby stuff. I also don’t mind paying for things like ready made formula for your baby so you don’t have to prepare it. I have a baby your baby’s age and it breaks my heart that you are all alone.
Please forgive me if I’ve offended you I don’t mean to, just trying to help in the only way I know Flowers

Babyroobs · 25/10/2020 22:54

@sausagerole

Just to echo what other PP have said, if I had a friend in your situation I think I'd risk it to help you out! Do you have anyone you could ask to help out overnight even, with feeding and resettling baby?
Exactly this. Someone needs to take the baby or stay while you isolate in one room and rest.
Quarterback11 · 25/10/2020 23:23

I think you are most contagious for the first 10 days, and once you have had 5 days with no temperature you should not be contagious. If you can hang in for another few days, and get help then so you can rest (your little one should technically isolate for 14 days from your positive test). Helper could wear PPE, take dc for a walk as suggested, drop off food etc.

SinkGirl · 25/10/2020 23:38

Oh OP you poor thing. What a stressful thing to have to go through. I am not a single parent but will never forget when me, DH and our twins got norovirus all at the same time. It was so hard to manage so I can only imagine what you are going through.

The plus side is your baby isn’t mobile yet so make the most of things like bouncers, swings, travel cot / playpen etc while you rest next to them in bed or on the sofa. If you don’t have any of those things ask if anyone can lend you one or can pick one up from Gumtree / Facebook and drop it off for you. Put on CBeebies if you have to and rest as much as you can. It’s only a short time and you just have to survive it, take any more pressure off yourself than that.

Make sure someone is on standby in case you go downhill but hopefully with enough rest you will feel better soon. Sleep whenever your baby is asleep, and in between try and provide some kind of sensory stimulation (simple baby toys, music etc) as this helps tire them out.

Hang in there and ask for help if you need it - I would chuck on a mask and apron and go and help if I knew you!

LH1987 · 25/10/2020 23:43

Oh that is awful, I have a 5 month old and think you must be some kind of wonder women to be coping at all!

Don’t worry about cleaning your home or any housework that is not 100% necessary. Eat whatever is easy and convenient. Most importantly, don’t forget it will pass and you will feel better!

I really hope you feel better soon.

bumblingbovine49 · 26/10/2020 00:19

Well the government didn't think it was too risky for Dominic Cummings and his wife to get someone else to look after their child . In their case they weren't even both very ill at the same time!

bookish83 · 26/10/2020 07:05

I feel really compelled to post again.

Please let someone take baby out for walks. Ppe/rain hood down and you putting baby in pram is as little risk as you can get, I'm sure. This will help babe sleep too and give you even an hour nap.
Xx

Isadora2007 · 26/10/2020 07:14

Your mum can be considered your extended household as you’re a single adult. There isn’t really any reason why she can’t move in with you or you her- especially as she is self isolating anyway. We’ve just done similar as my single parent daughter had Covid. She has a toddler and is pregnant as well- and actually managed pretty much to do everything she’d normally do. I think she had one afternoon nap. Other than that yes she was tired but not especially unwell, so hopefully your version of this virus will be similar and at four months your baby will nap regularly so you can too- as much as possible.

Original poster
HL123 · 26/10/2020 07:30

Thankyou all for your kind replies and suggestions I really appreciate it.
My mum is going to come and walk my baby today so I can sleep. We have discussed her staying but she's in her 60's and I really don't want to risk her catching it, however at the end of the week once my isolation period is over my daughter is going to go and stay with her for a night or two to so I can rest.
To the lady who offered to bring supplies if I live near her thankyou that's so kind Smile I have an online shop arriving today so will be stocked up x

OP posts:
OliveTree75 · 26/10/2020 07:36

Hope you feel better soon. I have a 5 month old and it's exhausting at the best of times. Hope you can get some rest whilst your baby goes out in the pram

BabyLlamaZen · 26/10/2020 18:11

@HL123

Thankyou all for your kind replies and suggestions I really appreciate it. My mum is going to come and walk my baby today so I can sleep. We have discussed her staying but she's in her 60's and I really don't want to risk her catching it, however at the end of the week once my isolation period is over my daughter is going to go and stay with her for a night or two to so I can rest. To the lady who offered to bring supplies if I live near her thankyou that's so kind Smile I have an online shop arriving today so will be stocked up x
Good idea op best of luckFlowers
AdoraBell · 26/10/2020 21:52

Glad you had a delivery booked, they’re like hen’s teeth, hope you got some rest while your DM took DC out. Accept your friend’s offer of help.

Sb2012 · 26/10/2020 22:39

@HL123

Thankyou all for your kind replies and suggestions I really appreciate it. My mum is going to come and walk my baby today so I can sleep. We have discussed her staying but she's in her 60's and I really don't want to risk her catching it, however at the end of the week once my isolation period is over my daughter is going to go and stay with her for a night or two to so I can rest. To the lady who offered to bring supplies if I live near her thankyou that's so kind Smile I have an online shop arriving today so will be stocked up x
I’m in West Yorkshire. If I’m too far from you the offer of paying for premade baby milk or anything that you need to help you as you recover from this awful virus still stands too. (I can do an online shop for essentials for you and send it out to you) just let me know. Flowers
Original poster
HL123 · 26/10/2020 23:36

@Sb2012 Thankyou so much, I'm a good 5 hours down south of you!
I am fully stocked on food and medicine from my delivery today and actually starting to feel a bit better, but your kind words and offer mean so much. X

OP posts:
whattodo2019 · 26/10/2020 23:41

ThanksSending you lots of love to get through this. I really hope you start to feel better xx

sausagerole · 28/10/2020 17:51

Glad you're feeling better, OP. Keep taking all the help you can get!

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