Should I accept visitors for my newborn baby?

[SpotlessMind88]

My first baby was born on Tuesday and everyone is excited to meet her but I don't actually want visitors due to corona virus. My mum signed up to the government scheme and gets a Covid test every week so I feel fine about her seeing my baby. Although my partner's family have no symptoms I'm reluctant to let them meet my baby. Are there any rules for this? Should visitors be discouraged? Should they wear masks? My family are totally understandable and keep saying give it 6 weeks before even entertaining the thought of visitors but my partner's family keep going on about it.
Any thoughts or advice would be greatly appreciated :)

Outdoors and with SD I would allow visiting, I wouldn’t be allowing cuddles by anyone outside of the household. My instincts would be t protect them as much as possible so I wouldn’t entertain the risk of close contact.

Up to you. YABU

I think its a bit OTT, but i would be happy for visitors from day 1.

My friends have had babies recently, one is happy for visitors but no one to hold baby, other is relaxed and is happy for people to hold baby.

@FluffySunshineBunny yes that's what my family have said, wait 6 weeks. And babies have died so it's a possibility.
It's good to know that others are feeling similar to me! It may seem unfair to treat parents differently but my mum is 68 and has shielded since March. My partner's dad is 50 and works as a scaffolder with hundreds of others and goes to the pub. So the risk from him is a lot more than the risk from my mum. Thank you for everyone's tips, I won't allow any cuddles

6 week old baby here - we allowed grandparents to visit (& cuddle!) with the proviso that they isolate for two weeks beforehand and then come straight to us so no infection possibility.

I think it's entirely up to each person. If you dont want any visitors, dont have any. I am due my baby in 3 weeks and will have immediate family and a few friends over (not all at once, obviously), but that's my choice. Do whatever you feel comfortable with.

Mine is 3 months and has only met grandparents outdoors on 2 occasions each. We are now holding off on any more physical visits due to weather. No way is anyone coming into our home. I think you're also not considering the risk to you- as post partum you will be particularly immune suppressed and arguably its worse for your baby if you get Covid and end up hospitalised / with long Covid than if your baby gets it. I had a c-section and have caught numerous infections as have been very run down in recovery. I'm just not prepared to take the risk.

Everyone I know who has had babies has let people hold them. But mumsnet does seem to have more extreme views than people I know in real life.

Could you compromise and let them visit but not hold the baby? Or go for a walk together somewhere outdoors.

Mines almost five months, and only this last month we have passed him to family for a cuddle, it still makes me very anxious, but he's growing up now and I know it's important for him to get to know grandparents and to be held by grandparents. Nobody knows how long this will last and at some point knew I needed to relax a bit with it, but with a newborn I'd certainly not pass over for cuddles.

My DC is six months old and has met their grandparents but hasn't been held by them. We're following the rules which means social distancing - 2m apart at all times. There's no way I'm running the risk of DC catching coronavirus, especially with rising rates: if there's even the slightest chance that it could affect them long-term then why on earth would you risk it? Neither am I going to risk my family catching covid from my DC.

Babies are adaptable. All they need for the first year or so is love and attention and affection from their parents. They don't need to be cuddled by all and sundry to grow up as normal human beings.

That being said, I'm the only person with a baby I know to have taken this decision. Everyone else is prepared to break the rules and take the risk, but if they want to put their baby, themselves, and family and friends at risk then I guess that's their choice. I do judge them for it.

I had a baby in July. The hospital confirmed there was no need to do anything other than follow the guidelines for the general population, healthy babies are extremely low risk.

We broke the guidelines by allowing all grandparents have a cuddle (ie not social distancing), I can't even imagine not letting them.

I was more worried about us picking it up in the hospital and passing it along.

I don't know anyone in real life who didn't give grandparents a chance to hold their babies.

Oh, and obviously nothing on the vaccination schedule has anything to do with covid so no need to take that into account.

Op you poor thing, I can't believe how selfish some people are, it's abhorrent.

Absolutely not, no.

They can't see the baby and its awful to pressure you.
It's selfish people like this who also get shirty when you ask them to wash their hands and breathe right in babies face because they... Couldn't possibly be carrying germs!

• it's also the timing op, in summer is one thing but winter?

Just say you’re sticking to the rules of you’re unsure. The rules state 2m distancing from people not in your household and in England children have to social distance too which means no one holding the baby. We are breaking the rules and letting close family hold out baby but not friends.

@Autumngoldleaf I completely agree. I can't imagine being so shellfish if it was the other way around. Thank you for your supportive advice.
@Inthewoodshed this is exactly my thoughts and spot on! I'm so glad I'm not the only one that feels and thinks like this 😊

@SpotlessMind88 sometimes it can feel like you're the the only one, and it's really hard. We had pressure from family too, but your baby is your priority now and they need to understand that what you say goes! There will be clashes about all sorts of things down the line so it's a good time to start setting those boundaries - and this is something that really does matter.

Congratulations on your newborn, by the way 🙂.

My baby ended up on a ventilator during the swine flu outbreak (bronchiolitus, pneumonia, swine flu, he caught it all). Little babies are vulnerable, it’s hard to say no to cuddles but the alternative is putting your precious baby at risk to keep others happy. Not worth it.

@MindyStClaire It's not about giving grandparents a chance. It's about keeping your baby safe, and keeping others safe, and following the guidelines so that the NHS doesn't become overwhelmed. If everyone just did what they wanted we'd be in an even worse position than we are now, with a whole bunch of people doing what they want to do. It wasn't an easy option to take, and it's not one we would have made if we had a choice, but I didn't choose to have my baby in the middle of a pandemic either. What I can choose is to keep my baby safe, and there's nothing wrong with the OP doing the same.

I can’t wait for my parents to meet baby.

Yes without a doubt
My elder 2 have a close relationship with grandparents. See min once a week.

My baby was born early 2020. And I let GPS see him during the later part of lockdown and hug him indoors and out. We felt the risk was minimal in our lives

I’m 32wks pregnant and will allow family/close friends to visit and hold baby if they want. I feel we are a risk anyway due to having 2 older children at secondary school and my partner teaches in specialist autism school and some of the kids there cannot socially distance and often spit or bite. My mum works in a large supermarket but I couldn’t expect to keep her away from baby especially as she said when I go back to work she’ll look after baby fir free on her day off so saves us on childcare expense. My worry is my step son as his mother did not really keep to guidelines eg had her friends round in lockdown and travelled to her brothers house but I couldn’t bring myself to ban him from meeting the baby sister he’s excited about having - he’s 6.

In my opinion life is too short and I would feel awful forever if stopped one of my baby’s great grandparents/grandparents from holding her and then something happened to them so they never got the chance.

I cannot imagine not letting any of the grandparents hold my newborn. Covid or not. Seems cruel to me, especially if one set have and the other have not. It's been blown up way out of proportion. I'm assuming you're in a low risk area or it wouldn't even be an option, so I say they're being reasonable to want to meet baby and have a cuddle, assuming they are well in themselves.