I’m so depressed

[Thedarksideofthemoon30]

I suffer with bad mental health anyway and BPD.

At the start of lockdown I had a breakdown and the doctor prescribed... running. 😂 anyway, I started feeling better and normal in July/August because it felt like we were getting some what back to normal.

Iv not taken a huge jump backwards. I feel anxious, stressed and moody. I can’t cope with the unknown. Not being in control. Unable to plan anything!

We were looking forward to going Liverpool since before lockdown for my sons birthday. We’ve been so excited and now obviously it probably wont happen. I feel like we have absolutely nothing to look forward too. I’m dreading Xmas which is a hard time anyway because my mum died on the 29th December 2009.

I’m just so depressed and can’t see an end.

Yes, it's depressing. You're right, you're not in control. So, difficult as it is, try not to think about the "middle distance". Plan for the coming few days. Plan for what you might do when it's all over. Don't think about Christmas, drive it out of your mind. You can't plan for Christmas until about a week beforehand. But you can plan little nice things to do in the next few days.

You aren’t alone OP, there are so many of us out here who feel the same way as you. After months of not seeing my family, we were meant to see them next week but it can’t happen due to additional restrictions. It’s my DD 1st birthday in December and it’s unlikely we will be able to see anyone for the same reason, same goes for Christmas - two events that have kept me going through the year. Things WILL get better, it can’t rain forever as they say. Just take one day at a time, try to find joy in the little things every day. And just think when all this is done, what an amazing time you will all have having a belated celebration