Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Covid

Mumsnet doesn't verify the qualifications of users. If you have medical concerns, please consult a healthcare professional.

Original poster

Advice please - single parent isolating when child negative

39 replies

Disorganisedfish · 02/10/2020 14:34

I had my test results yesterday that I was positive, Ds results today that he is negative.

It’s literally just the 2 of us as his dad is not in country. Ds is very clingy and worried I’m going to die - had been sleeping in my bed up till now.

How can I keep him safe? I feel like crap but going to bleach / anti bac the house now and wash all bedding.

I feel like I need to keep away from him, but without him realising as he’s already so anxious and worried.

Please can you guys give me some hints on what to do here? Thank you Flowers

OP posts:
PinotLovesMomma · 04/10/2020 11:18

@Brightdays2020

OP In your situation I would distance as much as possible depending on how it is physically eg can you use different bathrooms, you stay in your room mostly and communicate through devices so that you can keep an eye on each other? Do you have friends neighbors who can help deliver meals which your son can bring in and put one outside your room? Arrange for some virtual game sessions with his friends, use baby monitors between you too if available. Just some practical ideas which you can of course use whatever is available. Reassure him and get him occupied but I would distance. This is not the time for cuddles and it’ll pass. Hope you’ll go through this soon.
Hes 8 for gods sake she can't shut herself away from him for 10 days, communicate via device with him, expect him to fend for himself and bring her food to the bedroom door! Have a word with yourself woman Confused
Original poster
Disorganisedfish · 04/10/2020 11:22

@DianaT1969

Won't you have finished your quarantine by half-term? Get out to parks and see friends at a social distance outside during half-term. Out of interest, do you have any idea where you caught it?
He is at a private school so half term is earlier and a bit longer than most. There’s 2 days cross over where he can go in before we break up so long as nothing goes wrong - we are in a local lockdown here too so can’t meet up with other houses even at a distance. I am feeling okay about being solo with him for the month now, it’s more trying to get through the next few days where I feel crap and trying to keep him protected from that emotionally and physically.

I think practically there’s no way of properly distancing - and him being upset yesterday was a sign I needed to be more present. I’m trying to pass it off as me watching Netflix in bed and him being allowed YouTube on the big tv downstairs rather than me being apart from him on purpose if that makes sense.

OP posts:
Original poster
Disorganisedfish · 04/10/2020 11:24

I def caught it from work - 1/3 of our workforce has gone down with it now so they have had to shut the offices.

OP posts:
bumblingbovine49 · 04/10/2020 11:26

@Disorganisedfish

Thanks everyone for all your messages.

I feel rotten and am mostly in bed while Ds watches tv downstairs. He got upset yesterday so I am trying to be more present, but honestly, I just feel crap and so guilty.

His school have been brill and have sent home his timetable and work for each lesson that he needs to submit in real time if poss. I have no idea how I’m going to juggle this as I am meant to be working from home as well but think I may need to call in sick or take last minute holiday.

How long do Mild symptoms last? I am hoping I wake up tomorrow feeling so much better. I feel so sorry for my son - I am aware I’m ‘lucky’ in that I’m strong and fit, but I’ve been really shocked by how much this has knocked me Flowers

1 Call in sick. You cannot work while ill. Get rid of the worry about that

2 Tell the school you are quite ill at the moment and may not be able to supervise your ds doing work ( Not many 8 near olds would do school work on their own)

3 prioritise looking after yourself. Since you are young and fit, the only risk ( and even that is not a big one ) is that you are ill for longer than the usual 1-2 weeks . Research is beginning to show that those who try to do too much are more likely to develop this longer form of illness so if you want to do the best by your child, do every you can to ensure you rest as much as possible for at least a week or two

It is really hard I know but I would focus on that rather than worrying about getting work done and getting your son to do school work. Take care of yourself.

littlestpogo · 04/10/2020 11:32

Hey OP

I just wanted to send some virtual support - I am also a single parent with two DS, one who is 8. Being unwell when you are on your own is always so hard, but even harder with Covid as no one can come and support you.

I know what you mean about worrying about the time stretching ahead. Please call in sick to work and give yourself time to recover without that at least ( if you can). When you are unwell everything seems worse - I’ve recently been ill ( which lasted a couple of weeks), although another virus. My DS also becomes quite worried and anxious and I know I also found it quite hard to keep perspective even without it being Covid. Hopefully you will start to feel better soon and then things really will feel manageable again.

Take care of yourself

november90 · 04/10/2020 11:44

I hope you're ok Op?! Having the virus is bad enough but to then have the guilt/worry about your son must be even harder! The answer to your situation is black and white or matter of fact liek some people on here are trying to make out so ignore the ignorant responses! You're clearly a very devoted Mummy who is thinking of her son over herself even when you're unwell!
I'm a single Mum too, I have a 3 year old and a 20 week old baby and I've wondered what j am supposed to do too in this situation. I honestly think it would be incredibly difficult for you to effectively isolate in the house all the time. If you feel more comfortable actively encouraging distancing at home where possible then I see no harm in it but please be kind to your self ❤️ like you said with the half term it's abbot of a long slog and you're poorly too. The chances are your son may get it or he may not, but thankfully he's young and hopefully well ❤️

MrsJonesAndMe · 04/10/2020 16:36

Oh bless you both. Hope that you've let work know you're too poorly at this stage - it may be different later in the week, but for now focus on resting and tending DS's physical and emotional needs.

School work could also wait - maybe you can do a bit of reading or maths on your bed, but he's 8. Not going to miss out anything too detrimental.

AuditAngel · 04/10/2020 17:20

Call in sick to work, you are sick.

Tell school that feeding and caring for your son will be your priorities, if any school work is completed, it will be a bonus.

Do you have a friend that would shop for you? Aim for easy stuff freezer /ready meals

MsAwesomeDragon · 04/10/2020 17:53

Call in sick. You are sick, and you've got a test result to prove it!! This is exactly the sort of thing that sick leave is for.

And if you can't manage to do the homeschooling because you are ill, send school an email explaining that. Get your ds to do as much as he can by himself but anything that needs more adult input can wait til you're feeling better.

Don't try to be a martyr doing everything you would normally do. Stay in bed while you're ill and catch up with stuff when you're better.

Do explain to your ds that you'll be absolutely fine after a few days of bed. And if he needs cuddles let him have cuddles. Wear a mask if it makes you feel better, but he'll need to see that you're still ok and you need to demonstrate that it's nothing to worry about.

MotherOfDragonite · 06/10/2020 18:16

How are you doing, OP? I've been thinking about you and wanted to mention that your local council should be able to support you with food parcels and connecting you with volunteers who can do shopping for you and drop it outside your door if you need help.

Original poster
Disorganisedfish · 07/10/2020 15:04

@MotherOfDragonite

How are you doing, OP? I've been thinking about you and wanted to mention that your local council should be able to support you with food parcels and connecting you with volunteers who can do shopping for you and drop it outside your door if you need help.
Thank you for checking in - and for everyone’s support. It really has meant a lot Flowers

I am okay - exhausted but started to be able to do more after being pretty much bed bound for a couple of days. Someone at work who came down with this a few days before me is now in ICU which is very sobering though.

Ds is doing incredibly well and I’m very proud of him. Test and trace Called me on Monday and said if I didn’t have a temperature then I should just cuddle him as that seemed to be biggest link to contagiousness. It was very reassuring! His school have been brill too and he’s had some virtual lessons with his class over video link.

Thank you all again so much for your support Flowers

OP posts:
MRex · 07/10/2020 15:15

Happy to hear you're feeling better. Don't push yourself, you need to let your body take the time to heal.

MotherOfDragonite · 08/10/2020 21:58

So glad to hear you are doing well. You've been fantastic! It really gives me hope for if I catch it (I am also a single parent).

BexR · 09/10/2020 17:37

I know exactly how you feel OP. I'm so pleased you are feeling better.

I'm a single parent too and being ill when a small person needs you is really hard. Then add in all your natural instinct to protect them from illness. Flowers for you

New posts on this thread. Refresh page