Advice about work situation

[YellowWave]

I'm a nanny for a family. I will be faced with a situation in a few weeks time. Basically one of the children requires medical treatment abroad. One of the parents is due to fly abroad with the child for a week long stay in a childrens hospital on the continent. Then they come home.

The current advice is for the family to quarantine and isolate themselves.

The mother that I work for wants me to continue to attend to work in their home and she dressed it up as the two of them isolating in their rooms when they come home. The child will be in isolation for the first few days alright due to her health condition. I know the mother like the back of my hand and she won't isolate herself. She broke social distancing guidelines several times already and got into my personal space to breath down my neck. The woman will want me in their home minding the rest of the children, and doing her laundry. These will be 8 to 12 hour days working with the possibility of an exposure with no PPE. I will have my own masks, that's it. The children require close contact due to their needs.

So, what do I do? The woman has dressed up the situation saying they will quarantine in their rooms but I know them, that's a lie. She's putting me and my family at risk for covid infection and exposure. Should I be standing firm with her and tell her the public health guidelines of quarantining the family? She probably won't take it too well being told no but fcuk them.

I think you need to quit - you clearly despise them and your job.

I too think you should quit. I don't think this type of role is for you. You are there to do the tasks that's your job! You clearly hate them! Just please make sure that the poor child going for treatment doesn't think you leaving is their fault!!!

What you want is:
A not to work but
B get paid
Ask and see how that goes
Good luck with the job hunt!

I don't see the problem.. you don't want to do that type of work so don't do it. Quit. Find a new career. Get an education, get a better job. They can find someone new who actually appreciates the job and cares about their kids. Everyone wins.

I don't see why the dad needs to give up golf?? How is that relevant. Why do they have to give up tennis and going to the club etc? None of that stuff is banned.

I absolutely adore the children that I mind. They are so good. It's a battle I'm fighting. I was always happy to help the family but my role went into a different thing that I signed up for originally.

Sometimes the hours are too long and sometimes the parents don't come home to me and sometimes the hours are ungodly. Like I can start for 8.30 am and my contract states 6pm finishing time but sometimes the parents are not home until 8 or 9 or later. Sometimes they like to go out for dinner too after work. Extending my long work day to something ungodly and a lot of the times they don't tell me.

The household duties also went beyond what I signed up for. It's just the attitude that I get from the mother as if I'm there to serve her. Like going out the door to work where she's shouting behind her to me to put on a laundry wash her two from her laundry basket. There could be mountain of laundry already left at the machine for me to work on already. Then other times I could work on laundry for a few days and I could be kept going doing loads from the children's baskets and the other household laundry like towels and bedsheets. The woman nearly has a meltdown to me if I don't get time to do her laundry even though I could be kept busy doing loads.

Other times the older child/now teenager, could be sitting down to do their homework at 7pm and the mother comes home and nearly has a melt because the homework isn't done yet nevermind about an after school activity that the child could be scheduled in for preventing her to do the homework that the mother is having a meltdown about.

There was another evening with one of the children went to a friends house after school. The play date was scheduled in by the parents. They all then come home at a similar time. The child says she's hungry because she never ate and the mother has a sulking meltdown to me because the child isn't fed never mind that the child was not at home to be fed.

I always thought about the positives about the role to date and that has me still there. Its a regular wage coming in. It's close to home. I always loved helping. It is a job that's giving me nothing more but a big fat headache lately:
mind the children
Clean the house
Do all the laundry
Work on homework
Work anything from 8 to 12 hours a day
Cook the meals

I'm looking for work elsewhere but I'm finding it hard because it's just too intense. There's far too much expected of me and my contract is gone beyond what I signed up for.

Members of the family are now going abroad. It doesn't matter why they are going away. The public health guidelines states quarantine or self isolation is needed upon returning. Air travel and hospital stay is all high risk. I'm not happy with attending for work while they are in quarantine in the home. It's just too risky in case they develop symptoms.

The mother and child is going travelling abroad for hospital treatment on the continent. The public health guidelines states quarantine after travelling. They want me to continue into work and have close contact during their quarantine time. Work will be finish any time of the evening that they want. The father could easily cut out the golf trips during the families 2 weeks quarantine time and come home to his family and home and reduce my time in their home and risks and exposures. Isn't that what quarantine is? Restricting movements out and close contacts?

I think your being totally ridiculous! If you can't see the difference between an essential hospital trip and a holiday then frankly you shouldn't be in the role. Being in a children's hospital doesn't necessarily make them high risk.
Your issues with your working hours and what you are expected to do need discussing with them in a sensible manner. They sound like two highly stressed parents dealing with an ill child and high pressure jobs. No that's not your fault but unless you have an adult conversation with them about it it will not improve. Rather than raising lots of issues why don't you spend some time working on solutions.

If I liked the family I’d isolate with them and not put my partner or family at risk.

You don’t like the mother so that makes it difficult.

The other gripes are a red herring, you're obv not happy there so you need to get out. Do they pay you when they are home late ?

The isolating - you could go and if she does appear then leave. Presumably if they are travelling abroad for the treatment it's something quite serious.

It sounds like have contempt for your employers or the work and that you resent some aspects of the role (you mention laundry a lot. Not sure if this is a normal requirement of nannying?)

You also mention another period when the children were coughing etc. Lots of children are at school or at home coughing at the moment. What will you do if you do find another job and those children have the odd cough? If you are a bit fearful of working in any home during Covid (and I get that) maybe you should consider alternative roles.

I’m sure if my employer regularly expected me to work a few hours over my contracted hours, without paying me (presuming you’re not being paid overtime OP?) I wouldn’t be happy about it as I’m sure many Mnetters who have posted on this thread wouldn’t be happy about it. Also asking me to do other tasks that I didn’t sign up for!

OP, I’d maybe ask your thread to be moved to Employment Law, you might get some good advise on there.