Would you send DC back to school in these circumstances right now?

[PandaBearBear]

Just wondering what the general consensus is as we feel stuck and unsure.

One school age (primary) DC and one toddler who isn't in nursery yet.

DC meant to return to school in September.

We were having to shield all through lockdown as DH was having cancer treatment. He is now about to go into hospital for a stem cell transplant.

I don't have much idea what is happening with the death rate atm. I don't know how likely it is that we will go back into lockdown. Obviously if DH was to contract the virus it would be fatal at the moment.

Would you be sending DC back to school?

I think in your situation OP, no I wouldnt. The risk to your DH is too high if he caught it, and even though its not likely he will catch it as numbers of infection are relatively low, the fact that if he did he would likely be very ill and possibly die, its too big a risk to take. thats what my inclination would be.

I would also talk to the medical professionals dealing with your DH transplant because if they deem it too risky they will probably provide something in writing for you to show the school/nursery. Not alll risks are the same and this one sounds higher than most situations.

No I wouldn’t, it would be madness to even consider it. Infection rates will rise in all areas once the kids go back. It’s not a risk I would take.

No I wouldn't.

He needs to speak with his consultant and find out what they think but in your situation I wouldn't be sending your child back to school and I'd I were their teacher I'd actually be quite willing to help support their learning at home

My father had leukaemia in another country and any kind of stem cell transplant you’d be in an isolation ward in hospital there for months. Is there any way your DH can stay in a sterile isolation ward? My understanding is that in the UK there is not so much of that support available. I think this is one situation where it might be wise to keep the whole family at home if your DH has to come home after the transplant.

No I wouldn't, and I am really quite relaxed about the whole thing generally. I think you should be able to get something in writing from your DH's doctor though shouldn't you, so that school/LEA know why your child isn't in.

Will your DH be in isolation in hospital for a certain amount of time anyway after the transplant though?

Talk to his consultant.

DH will be in hospital for around a month, depending on how his recovery goes.

No I wouldn't be sending my child back in those circumstances.

I would home educate and try to make a bit of an adventure of it, make the best of things like being able to go (safely) outside to visit places that will suddenly be quiet once schools go back. I'd probably pretend to myself we'd been posted abroad for a year and throw myself into making the best of it, and try not to dwell on what my dc might or might not be missing this particular term. I don't think for a primary age dc there will be any dreadful consequences at all to a few months or a year of home education.

I agree with a PP to get a letter from your husband’s consultant. In your situation I wouldn’t send my child due to the risk which is only going to rise as the rate of transmission is likely to increase during winter. Along with the lack of social distancing in schools, the two main parts of the government’s guidance for schools that I think is particularly risky are the fact that there have to be 2 or more positive cases in a bubble over 14 days for the bubble to be sent home (meaning it can spread quickly between asymptomatic people) and the fact that parents don’t need to show evidence of a negative test before their symptomatic child returns to school. I do think a small minority of people won’t get their child tested but say they have and then continue to send their child to school to avoid quarantine.

The school should have its risk assessment available on the school website which will give you more information about how they are mitigating risk. If it was me I’d definitely get the consultant’s opinion then see how things pan out with the other children going back to school first before sending my child in your situation.

I’m so sorry to hear of this difficult situation.

My instinct would be to not send your eldest to school if it is a matter of weeks before your husband goes in . Definitely speak to your husband’s doctors.

What age is your eldest dc? If they are YR or YR1, that would honestly steer me more in the direction of keeping them off.

Absolutely not. DC can catch up later or you can get work sent home.

No i don't think I would. Dundee school have been back 2 weeks and already have 4 schools with positive cases. 3 of them have just one case each and the other, ASN school has 27, only 3 of which are pupils.

That said, the 3 schools with one case each may escalate with time.

DC will be going into year 4.

I will try to get in contact with DHs consultant tomorrow. It's such a confusing and stressful time.

Wishing you and your family all the best @PandaBearBear

I would be edging towards not but I agree it’s best to talk it through with the care team.

Ds was shielding and talking with his team helped me feel safe to send him back but with a “just incase plan”

I'm very relaxed about this entire thing but in your situation I wouldn't send DC back.

I would for the period when your DH is in the isolation ward, then pull them out when he's home...

Do you have relatives that your husband might also be able to stay with (or the kids). A stem cell transplant is usually a fairly long admission (depending on type), and you won’t be able to visit him in hospital at the moment. So you might be able send the kids to school whilst he’s In having treatment relatively safely. Also, please don’t think it’s a fatal for him If he catches it. The reason many people die from covid is due to a hyper inflammatory syndrome, and people with impaired immune responses don’t necessarily have the immune system to mount this reaction. Obviously you don’t want him to have it, but we’ve had lots of patients get through SCT and covid, including some that are completely asymptomatic.

Do you have close family nearby? Would the year 4 child be able to go and stay with them for a month to enable them to go back to school? I know this isn't a solution that is for everyone but it could be a temporary measure maybe

I don't think anyone would judge you for not sending your children back and I'd hope that the school was helpful and supportive.

However i think i would look into how many cases there in my actual area - easy to do - because vast swathes of England (mostly rural areas) have next to no cases right now. They are concentrated in the big cities, especially in the north. Of course that could/will change.

The other thing to consider is do you think you could cope with your children at home and homeschooling with everything else that's going on.
Sending lots of wishes to your DH.

to add if he is in isolation anyway in hospital for several weeks and isn't allowed visitors, I would send my kids to school during that time .