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Original poster

DS wants to go for a sleepover

39 replies

Littlemiss74 · 10/08/2020 18:22

DS 12 has become very moody & withdrawn during lockdown. I was sent a shielding letter so we were very careful and didn’t see anyone for ages. As time went on I became a bit less anxious about the virus and more anxious about his mental health.
I contacted a mum of a boy from school and they have been meeting up regularly on their bikes and he has been in his house once. This seemed to make him alot happier.

The other boy has now asked him for a sleepover to which I’ve said no as it seems a step too far. A mighty meltdown has followed and I am apparently the worst parent in the world!

Just wondering what other people’s thoughts were. I have explained to him on many occasions that I have to be careful because of my medication but he doesn’t get it and basically just hates me🙁 Should I let him go seeing as they spend most of their time together anyway?

OP posts:
dementedpixie · 10/08/2020 20:45

They do have to socially distance if they are 12+ years in scotland

Redlocks28 · 10/08/2020 20:48

Sleepovers are ok.

DS wants to go for a sleepover
dementedpixie · 10/08/2020 20:49

We know they are allowed but it states social distancing should be observed too. Would that be likely with kids?

blacktop · 10/08/2020 20:54

@dementedpixie

They do have to socially distance if they are 12+ years in scotland

Yes, sorry he is 12. It wouldn't stop me letting him have a sleepover anyway.

Original poster
Littlemiss74 · 10/08/2020 20:55

I know shielding is paused but it’s always in the back of my mind that I was shielding and so I am going to be more anxious about things I think. It’s not as if it’s gone away so all back to normal now. I suppose it’s about finding a balance which I have tried to do by letting him out at all. Some people I & he know have not let their kids out at all (but ds conveniently forgets that🙄)

OP posts:
blacktop · 10/08/2020 20:58

My kids are going back to school this week so I suppose that is why I wouldn’t be fussed about a sleepover.

palacegirl77 · 10/08/2020 22:00

Definitely let him go.

  1. Theyre allowed
  2. They are spending time together anyway
  3. Unlikely he would catch it but if the other kid has it he will anyway
  4. He is old enough to understand the "risks" - speak to him about hand washing, taking antibac gel, sleeping at the other end of the room, keeping the window open
  5. Youve said his mental health has suffered, he is a 12 year old boy, so many young men suffer mental health problems.
LilyPond2 · 10/08/2020 22:25

Absolutely no way would I be letting a child of mine have a sleepover if I were on the shielding list! The posts along the lines of , "It's allowed so it's fine" are completely inane. Just because something isn't prohibited by law doesn't mean that it's safe or sensible, eg there is no law prohibiting me from eating nothing but ice cream. Does that mean that switching to an ice cream only diet is guaranteed not to have serious health consequences?

blacktop · 10/08/2020 22:42

The posts along the lines of , "It's allowed so it's fine" are completely inane. Just because something isn't prohibited by law doesn't mean that it's safe or sensible, eg there is no law prohibiting me from eating nothing but ice cream. Does that mean that switching to an ice cream only diet is guaranteed not to have serious health consequences?

Inane?

It’s ok for people to move on with life. Shielding has been paused and yes it is ok to start doing things again. Being cautious is fine, but you are allowed to live too. My Dad was shielding, he followed the government advice to the letter, so it’s not unreasonable for him to continue to follow it now it is changing.

Redlocks28 · 10/08/2020 22:43

@LilyPond2

Absolutely no way would I be letting a child of mine have a sleepover if I were on the shielding list! The posts along the lines of , "It's allowed so it's fine" are completely inane. Just because something isn't prohibited by law doesn't mean that it's safe or sensible, eg there is no law prohibiting me from eating nothing but ice cream. Does that mean that switching to an ice cream only diet is guaranteed not to have serious health consequences?
Would you let them go back to school in 3 weeks if you were on the shielding list?
LilyPond2 · 10/08/2020 23:01

@blacktop I think you have misunderstood my point. I am not suggesting that people on the shielding list who decide to take some risks in the interest of not putting their lives on hold are inane. However, some posters seem to see the position as, "It's allowed. End of story. " Common sense says that the risks for those who were shielding didn't magically disappear on 1 August (or whatever date shielding officially ended). People with a condition serious enough to have put them on the shielding list are wise to be cautious, and it's not unreasonable for people on the shielding list to take a more restrictive approach than simply considering what's allowed as a matter of law.

blacktop · 10/08/2020 23:02

I think you have misunderstood my point

Not at all.

LilyPond2 · 10/08/2020 23:12

@Redlocks28 If I were faced with that scenario I think I would seriously consider home educating. I am nervous enough about DD going back to school as it is, particularly as there's a fairly significant Covid outbreak a couple of miles down the road from us...

Racoonworld · 10/08/2020 23:14

Please don’t unless you are sure they can keep 2m apart. People need to start sticking to the rules or schools are not going to stay open for very long this winter and we will all be back to homeschooling.

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