Feeling very lonely

[Lokikitty]

I've felt very lonely at times in the past but nothing compared to the last 4 months. I have a teenager who lives with me part of the week.
When I'm alone I feel tearful, lost and exhausted. I am having counselling but just don't know how I will ever feel better.
It was so hard to even consider trying counselling again.
I wouldn't normally take time off work but the agency work that I would be doing over the summer holiday isn't possible this year.
What have you found that helps you cope with loneliness?

Radio? other internet forums for personal interests? Online courses? sports clubs? running groups are not running together, but are quite often setting group challenges and comparing notes on face book. Voluntary work? Goodgym?

Thanks, that's a lot of suggestions. I have done tons of voluntary work in the past and I didn't find it helpful. I struggle to connect with people.
I started art classes and that's been nice but expensive. Just wish I could do the paid work that I'd usually be doing.

I hope you find something

What helps me is talking to friends and family - either on the phone or in person. Have been having a lot of socially distanced picnics recently. Also books - some of the characters are like old friends.

Are you lonely because you can't meet with people or you dont know people to meet with or do you feel isolated from people even if you are with them (if you dont mind me asking)?

I've been reconnecting with old friends by meeting up for socially distanced walks. Also tried to talk to family more. I can feel isolated when with other people, especially in a group.

I've also been going on picnics. Used to be a bookworm but haven't been able to find a good book for quite some time!

If you are feeling lonely and isolated when you are with others then could it be that you are a little depressed? The last 6 months have been enough to depress anyone.

If you think that's a possibility please talk to your gp. I suffered a mild depression years ago and it was horrible - but easily treated once diagnosed.

@Lokikitty

I've been reconnecting with old friends by meeting up for socially distanced walks. Also tried to talk to family more. I can feel isolated when with other people, especially in a group.

I can totally relate to what you’re saying. I’m a single parent too and find it much harder when I’m on my own.

Today has been a tough one.

I try to find things to do that are meaningful in some way. Help a friend or neighbour somehow. Watch or read something that is on my list to do.

I do find exercising helps a lot .... but it’s hard to motivate yourself at times. Sometimes you have to jump out of bed and just do it without thinking ... it’s a better way to start the day.

Don’t despair.... it will get better in small steps.

And you’ve always got Mumsnet behind you.

I completely relate to this, despite being in very different circumstances - I am childless, but live with my DP. I said to him today that I am posting on Instagram Stories a lot because it helped me to feel connected to people, then thought that sounded really tragic!

The city we live in is back in lockdown, which doesn’t help. I had a lovely long chat with my neighbour tonight over the wall, which was great, and I also really value interactions with shop staff. I’d got used to having friends round for coffee/wine, even though I hadn’t been in any restaurants etc, and having that taken away feels rough. We have the radio on in the kitchen all day, I read a lot, but have been re-reading childhood books, Famous Five currently, plus obviously online contact.

No suggestions, OP, but I can empathise. Tomorrow is my last day of holiday after six weeks off, and for the first time ever I am itching to go back to work, although it will still be WFH.

@Judystilldreamsofhorses

I completely relate to this, despite being in very different circumstances - I am childless, but live with my DP. I said to him today that I am posting on Instagram Stories a lot because it helped me to feel connected to people, then thought that sounded really tragic!

The city we live in is back in lockdown, which doesn’t help. I had a lovely long chat with my neighbour tonight over the wall, which was great, and I also really value interactions with shop staff. I’d got used to having friends round for coffee/wine, even though I hadn’t been in any restaurants etc, and having that taken away feels rough. We have the radio on in the kitchen all day, I read a lot, but have been re-reading childhood books, Famous Five currently, plus obviously online contact.

No suggestions, OP, but I can empathise. Tomorrow is my last day of holiday after six weeks off, and for the first time ever I am itching to go back to work, although it will still be WFH.

I used to re-read a lot of Enid Blyton's book went I felt low. Mainly Famous Five and Malory Towers. I've had 2 weeks off work for the first time in years. I avoid taking time off because I feel so much better when I have a routine.

Thanks everyone for your replies. I realized when I last spoke to my counsellor that I don't really do anything unless it has a purpose. For example doing something for work or for my dd. This is something I need to work on.