Test centre - pointless because you have to do it yourself?

[RubaiyatOfAnyone]

Had to take DD (5yo) to a test centre this morning because she woke up with a sore throat and temperature. Closest one was Welwyn Garden City.

Not sure what I expected, but at bare minimum it was for someone experienced to swab us for the test.

Instead, they hold up a bunch of cards telling you where to drive/stop, and a phonenumber to call to speak to them without lowering the windows. The reception was terrible, but they eventually got across that “the government won’t let us do tests on under 13s, you have to do it” and then also “as you’re testing her we can’t test you, you have to do both of you” and then they posted 2 tests in through a cracked window and waved me into a parking space.
It was basically impossible to do the test correctly - i can’t see my tonsils, and gagged too much to reach where i think they are. Kneeling on the front seat and leaning into the back for daughter, she freaked out whenever i got the swab back far enough, and the instruction leaflet days if it touches the inside of her mouth (which it did everytime she freaked) the test is invalid. So we handed in two totally pointless tests which will show negative regardless of infection, whilst a bunch of bored 20 year olds stood around in high vis jackets waving cars around cones without looking up from their phones.

Is this everyone’s experience? How is this a viable system in a pandemic?

I think the reason might be that they don’t want to have to hold down a small child, it’s nicer for the child for the parents to do that. My son (aged four) was hysterical and shaking when we did the test and it took both of us to hold him. I don’t understand why they couldn’t test you though. It can be quicker going to the test centre if you have one nearby as (in my area at least) the post is only collected once a day and not on Sundays.

I have done 2 at home tests then 1 drive through with self and jumpy 6yo.

The first test (home) was the worst, much easier at home but waiting several days for the delivery, collection and results not great. Drive through was virtually 24 hours from symptoms to negative results so minimal disruption. I put the car seat onto the passenger seat for the short journey as I couldn’t have managed by leaning over.

Can you register now for a home test? I’m sure our second one arrived more quickly and you’d still be within the time limit. An exciting video was a big help.

I had same process as youat our local drive through test centre ie self test, two months ago (Midlands)

I did a test this morning at the drive through. I found it to be much easier than I expected.
Looked in the mirror whilst swabbing tonsils. Found that too be easier.

I went for my second test 2 weeks ago, the first was in early May, both at the same drive through centre. The first, very simple, directed to parking spot where someone took the swan through my window. Second time when I arrived they held up a sign asking if I was happy to conduct my own test. I must have looked shocked as she then turned the sign around to show a message on the other side asking if I would prefer them to carry out the test - I chose this option, but it definitely felt as though they are aiming for most people to do their own. I agree that I'd much rather someone with more practice carried it out, otherwise I would have just ordered a home one.

I did my own at home; if the dc need them I'd rather order tests to the house again and do them there. I can't imagine the wrangling it would take to get ds3 properly tested whilst in a car but at home it would be fine.

Are you not allowed to get out of the front of the car and get in the back to swab your child? Surely there’s no way you could do it just by twisting around in the front seat ala passing back snacks on a motorway journey?

I assumed if you went to a drive through test place that they did it. I'm absolutely certain that I wouldn't be able to test myself. Not sure there's much point me getting one if I have to do it!

I found it extremely easy to test myself.

Open mouth in front of mirror, run swab stick over tonsils for 10 secs, put same swap stick up nostril for same amount of time, put stick in sample bottle.

It made me cough for about 2 seconds.

Use a mirror and you’ll be fine. (I understand children might find it scary).

I went to the same test centre as you and had pretty much the same experience testing my 4 year old but I actually thought it was fine and quite efficient.
They asked if I would need to get out of car to swab him or if I could reach over, and directed to a further away space when I said I'd need to get out. It obviously isn't a comfortable experience swabbing yourself but not that difficult I thought.
We went to test centre as thought it would be quicker to get results than waiting for a home test. I already knew before going that most people swab themselves so I guess it could be partly about expectations.

What happens if you don't have tonsils?

I was thinking that as well! I don’t have tonsils and nor do my 2 children so where exactly is it supposed to go?

I was tested in the hospital two days ago and there is no way I could have done that to myself, they put it so far back

For children (I'm not sure of the age cut off) you can just do both nostrils.

I took my 17 month old to a test centre on Monday as we'd get the results quicker (received around 24 hours after booking the test). Staff shouted through the closed car window but were really helpful and supportive, and made clear that I could easily just ask for a new test if needed (which I did, DD grabbed the swab within seconds and chucked it on the floor!). I also climbed into the back with her which was much easier.

I found it really well-managed and felt that support was there if I needed.

I think it’s awful. I’m sure the U.K. is the only country forcing people to do their own tests (I have recently moved over from the Middle East, where everyone is being tested repeatedly by nurses). I had to test my 3 kids a couple of weeks ago and it was a dreadful experience. I wasn’t allowed out of the car and two of them were strapped into the back seats!