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Wwyd

6 replies

betteliefsen · 19/07/2020 05:01

We were doing the supermarket shopping for an elderly relative who is 89 in sheltered housing and who has three risk factors for covid. He's refusing to stay in and drove to two different coffee shops for coffee in one and lunch in the other and then to the supermarket and then to B and Q for a 'look round'. He knows I think this is not sensible.

There is a restaurant where he lives which is socially distanced where he can get all his meals and he can afford this, it's good quality food according to him, and social rooms which are again distanced. He won't use those because he doesn't want to be with other people due to the risk of covid. He's also been out to the barbers. We are not allowed to visit, nobody Is but he has an outside door so we go weekly and stay 2m away.

My DCs and I are vulnerable but not shielding, my work is an increased risk because of my job but I'm on annual leave now. He wants me to meet him in coffee shops but I have said no and offered to meet in the park which he walks in and bring coffee and cakes all round as he does this with his friend. He refuses and wants me to got to a coffee shop.

Wwyd?

OP posts:
rosesandcashmere · 19/07/2020 05:24

I'd go. You're already in his bubble (I think from what you're saying?) and I don't blame him for going out now. I presume whilst you've done his shopping etc he's stayed in? He's 89, I guess he wants whatever time he has left to resemble normality. It's a tricky one. You can be a metre apart in the cafe though?

betteliefsen · 19/07/2020 07:47

No, we are not really in his bubble. I'm in my work one and we have always socially distanced when we have seen him. He's seeing other people often and not socially distancing, he's not doing bubbles though he did stay in until he decided a couple of months ago that he wanted to do his own shopping.

OP posts:
StopGo · 19/07/2020 08:06

What are you worried about, giving him Coronavirus or him infecting you?

Sounds as though he has the capacity to make decisions. He and many other older people have no wish to isolate.

DM is housebound,DSis and I have been so careful throughout lockdown to socially distance as we care for her in between the carers visits.

Two weeks ago following a minor issue in her house we discovered that she's had a constant stream of visitors throughout lockdown. She was a risk to us not the other way round. A significant number of older vulnerable people have no interest in shielding.

betteliefsen · 19/07/2020 08:56

He's more if a risk to us then we are to him, I wasn't up for posting in aibu but am I being u in not meeting him in the coffee shops given he's out and about socialising and shopping as if nothing is going on?

OP posts:
StopGo · 19/07/2020 10:27

I don't think you are being unreasonable at all. Do what makes you feel safe Flowers

NoMoreJunk · 19/07/2020 10:31

Your worried about you and your children.

He is seeing alot of people.

Don't meet him, He has a higher chance of giving it to you

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