Sleepovers meet up, the joys of policing teenagers in these times

[Everydayisalearningday]

My dd 15 hasn’t broke a rule yet and to be honest looking at how so many teenagers and young adults have behaved in the last month or so I think i deserve a medal lol!!

But it’s gone on for far too long now they’re suffering the dynamics of friendship are starting to breakdown (out of sight out of mind) theres always parents who are happy to break every rule going so I’m now getting “can I sleep over at Cs her parents a nurse so if they’re fine to have me what’s your problem”, meet ups down the beach etc etc

I’m torn and muddled trying to get my head around it especially as come sept they’ll have no life trying to catch up for GCSEs this is all whilst not coping at all with my own physical and mental health, I’m struggling today

Oh let them go

They need contact with their peers

I had 6 14 -16 year old girls sleep in a tent at my house at the weekend for a birthday and the biggest thing I had to worry about was alcohol and cleaning of puke 🤮

My teens have divided their friends in to "mostly following the guidelines" and "not bothering at all". They've chosen themselves to not meet up with the ones in the second category.

I think you need to think about what's ok for you as a family. For us, that means we're not happy for our DC to go into other people's houses (or for their friends to come into ours) but we are tacitly accepting that their meetups outside may be in groups of larger than 6 (normally 8 or 9, not hundreds!) and that they will not socially distance all the time, but at least will try to most of the time.
So in your example, meet up down the beach would be ok; sleepover not.
When they are back at school in September in ridiculous sized "bubbles", I can't see the point of getting them to follow any guidelines out of school with their school friends. My feeling is that we are doing it now, so that it's much safer (fewer cases) by September.

Everyone has to decide at what point following the rules to the letter is too much compromise for their mental health. I'd let them see each other x

Have I misunderstood? I thought it was now OK to go and stay overnight with friends or family members.

We had family to stay last weekend and I have a friend coming this weekend so I'd be fine if my teens wanted to invite a friend for an overnight stay.

Happy for ds to meet outside with friends (I don't think it's more than 6 people but not the end of the world if it is) but definitely no sleepovers. You don't need to have a sleepover for your mental health - seeing friends in the daytime is perfectly fine.

You can meet up to 5 other households as long as you are outside, but only one other household inside. In either case you need to maintain social distance (2m, or 1m + other precautions).

My view is our family stick to our own standards. I was indoctrinated brought up that way, and although it was quite tough in the earlier teen years I was very strong in the older teen years which I see as a good thing.

I wouldn't allow sleepovers now because they are high risk for transmission and my sense of social responsibility (to stick to things that keep transmission low) would trump individual interests.

Also to you OP as you're struggling today.

Really struggling with this too, my DD2 is desperate to see as much of friends as possible and I'm sure she hasn't always been distancing , even though we have been trying to drive it home . Now she has symptoms , sore throat, temp etc and being tested ..I'm terrified, as we are all on the vulnerable list . Hope not covid , but whatever, I'm hoping it will make her stop and think a bit more . I had said yes to a sleepover for next week, but now changed my mind ! Not ready to go there yet .

Why would you not allow a sleepover with one other person when the rules allow it now?

@flowerycurtain

Why would you not allow a sleepover with one other person when the rules allow it now?

Because I think the risk is fairly high and the UK government has unlocked too early for England's situation. If I lived in Scotland I probably would!

Hope you’re all ready for schools not opening in September

The schools could just as likely close because of adults spreading Covid as children.

I think you are being a bit mean frankly, especially if she has been really good, and not broken any rules all this time!