letting daughter's boyfriend stay over?

[goose124]

my daughter is 20 and has a boyfriend the same age. We've stuck mostly to the rules since March and haven't had anyone in our house except someone to fix the back door which wouldn't lock. She's met her boyfriend outside for picnics etc and I'm sure they haven't been socially distanced, I'm not that silly! She now wants him to visit her inside our house and also possibly stay overnight and I'm not sure. Her sister has type 1 diabetes, recently diagnosed and is anxious about catching the virus. My husband thinks that she should continue to meet him outside and not inside our home. I'm thinking perhaps that's a bit mean and that this "no people in your house" rule could continue indefinitely. What do you all think?

anyone?!

You think you are being mean? It would be a lot meaner to your anxious diabetic daughter if you allowed the other daughter's bf to stay over. What message would that send to your diabetic dd?

Do the guidelines allow for dd's bf to come over and stay the night with her? I don't think they do.

I guess it depends on what you are comfortable with. My sons gf stayed over this week but none of us are in an at risk group and the infection rate here is very very low.

yeah, that's what I'm thinking. Everyone else, including my 83 year old Mother with chronic asthma, is breaking the rules.So it kind of weakens my defence when I try to insist they wait a bit longer or meet outside the house. I know that I'm doing the right thing, but she thinks we're being unkind and her boyfriends family are happy for her to go inside their house. (but asked her to check we're ok with it as they know we don't want anyone inside our house at the moment)
It's so hard, but I know we need to continue to say no. Without a vaccine though when will be able to hang out with people normally again?

If you're all breaking the rules I really don't see why you are bothering.

Shielding finishes at the end of July. Remember that cv19 doesn't disappear then, there's just a lot less of it around. I would think the majority will get it at some stage.

I have a shielding child. Bearing in mind shielding is about to finish as long as the bf isn't taking massive risks I would allow him over.

How old is diabetic DD? If she's old enough to maintain social distancing it's less of an issue.

I would also be trying to help DD manage her cv19 anxiety as it'll be around for a while. You could continue the extra cleaning recommendations for longer. How many bathrooms do you have?

If her boyfriends family let her go inside their house, could she not just stay over at his instead?

The purpose of shielding was to reduce the risk of a peak the NHS couldn't cope with and reduce the risk to the most vulnerable when there was most virus around. Unfortunately shielders have to come to terms with the fact they may get it unless they lock themselves away for a long time.

If your DD is going in her BF house then coming back into yours I really don't see why her BF cannot come in to your house, as she could potentially be bringing it in to your house anyway!

As Melissa said. She’s already been in contact with him. If it were me though, I would probably get a tent for the garden and let them hang out in there. That way there might be slightly less risk to your other daughter, and she will be less anxious. Whilst at the same time keeping your daughter/her boyfriend happy.

Bear in mind in Scotland and Wales your daughter would be able to have her partner in the house with no social distancing. I don’t see what the difference is to be honest. I don’t know why Boris hasn’t addressed this yet.

My daughter’s boyfriend has stayed with us recently, and it has done their mental health the world of good.

Are you allowed to stay over in someone else's house? I saw a friend of my son's had a sleepover for her birthday this weekend (with several girls), and I was a bit surprised, I didn't think it was allowed.

The guidelines say he can stay over “ stay overnight away from your home with your own household or support bubble, or with members of one other household”.

Theoretically, anyone new in the house should be social distancing unless they are part of a single person's bubble.

However, I doubt very much that many people are doing this. I would let him visit as normal and stay the night with her.

Unless your family are going to keep locked away until there is a vaccine, normal life has to start again.