Please tell me I'm not the only one who hasn't been to the supermarket

[Snuggles81]

So the last time I stepped foot in a supermarket was March 20th on my way home from work, before all the social distancing changes happened in stores.

Since then my DH has done all our shopping and I have now got myself all stressed and anxious about going to one.

It's not the risk of catching the virus that worries me (I'm still working in school, going out for social distance walks etc) but the change and rules on the supermarkets and some of the way people have be treated.

I suffer with anxiety anyway and always overthink new situations.

I've now made going to the supermarket this big issue in my head.

Am I the only one feeling this way? Such a silly thing to worry about but the thought of going shopping of any kind worries me.

I haven't been either. We've been getting ocado deliveries and meat and veg box deliveries and if we've needed anything else my DH has insisted on going. However I'm going to M&S today for picnic food for tomorrow and am ridiculously excited about it :)

I haven't. My DH has popped in now and again but we have organised lots of regular deliveries for most of our food eg butcher veg box, coffee, cheese, beer, wine and we already had the milkman. We just use the supermarket for household stuff we can't source elsewhere.

@Alialialiali Have you ever considered pulling yourself together? And when you've done that, try learning something called 'consideration for others'.

OP, I've shopped every week except one since lockdown began and even so there's been times when my anxiety has kicked in. It's a new way of doing things and it worries people. Generally, I've found people are careful and polite and sticking to the rules. Supermarket staff are largely wonderful.

Round here, Asda is awful, Tesco pretty good (although queues can be very long) and Aldi is brilliant. I don't use Morrisons regularly but last time I went in it was very relaxed and almost like 'old' normal. Take your time, remember other people will be anxious too and you'll be fine

OP, I have been going every day. It's absolutely fine. It's a bit depressing as you have to follow the arrows on the floor in some cases (Tesco - and perhaps others? I don't have an Asda or Sainsbury's nearby), and the tills are shielded by plastic screens - but it's really not much different from how it was before. Plastic till screens aside, Lidl and M&S in particular are pretty much exactly the same, only you have to queue two metres apart for the tills. Waitrose is exactly the same as it was, if you can be bothered to queue to get in there in the first place. The loos in my local one are open, too. There are a few oddball customers who give you the evil eye for not being 10 metres away rather than 2, but there are always oddities wherever you go.

Honestly, it is fine.

I was nervous about going back to the supermarket first time but it was fine. Different branches have different standards, some stricter than others and I would take your cue from those around you. I always go really early as there are far fewer people around and take a list as the arrow system means it is not usually possible for you to go back a few aisles if you have forgotten to pick up something. I know my local Tesco layout so I sometimes write the list as I would come across the items, it also stops me being indecisive and lingering when others are trying to get to the same items. They don’t really strictly social distance in my Tesco anymore apart from lining up to get in and paying. Staff are in the aisles so you have to pass them at less than 2 meters. Some people motion you to go past them as they are lingering so I go past quickly.

To save faffing about I carry my clubcard and credit card in one pocket and my hand gel and a £1 for the trolley in the other pocket.

I haven’t been in any shop since March 5th. I had Covid19 after that and now just shop online. I don’t miss supermarkets at all but do occasionally miss pottering around bookshops or haberdashers.

I had not been in a supermarket since the beginning of March as I hate food shopping and go as little as possible. Then 2 weeks ago I went to an Aldi.#

I hated it. No one way systems so people walking wherever they liked. No staff keeping an eye on customers. Customers getting really close to me.

The checkout was a nightmare. I stood well back from the man in front of me, even further back than the markings but the man behind me came and stood quite close behind me just like people did before this which I hated then. I turned and glared at him and he moved back.

I will be sticking with click and collect from Sainsbury's which is quick and easy

Both Tesco and Sainsburys are very well organised. Go at a non-peak time. Staff are helpful and pleasant. Early in the day everyone is at their best, I feel.

Hello OP. You are def not alone. Last time I went to supermarket was late at night first weekend of panic buying. Massive Sainsbury’s, stripped bare. I’ve had to go out for work and small And local is definitely the way for me. I’m in countryside so village shops have been good as everyone knows everyone. DH does everything in the “scary” shops. I’ve used Amazon for fmcg stuff (loo roll, washing tabs etc), Boots for shampoo, soap and this week face masks. And managed to get three Tesco delivery slots. We managed to get milk And dairy delivered and have good local butcher and local for veg too.

This academic in the US has loads of useful info. www.erinbromage.com/post/how-to-have-a-safer-pandemic-memorial-day

Her writing is very accessible and it’s all about information and mitigation. We all know you can’t get rid of the virus, but I’ve found her stuff really reassuring and practical. She wrote for friends and family and now has 17 million hits. I’ve Got to work out how to adapt my workplace too 🙄 And it’s been really useful. She had a piece published in the NY Times about how to have a safe outdoor bbq with family so google her if you prefer not to use the link. She also has a one pager on exactly which products work for cleaning.

Practical ways for coping has been a massive cock up apart from hand washing on the part of government. Of course we’re all anxious, no ones telling us how to manage day to day. People seemed surprised that Chris Whitty said if you used a relative’s loo you needed to wipe down etc. Wtf did they all think they should do? I read something early on from a microbiologist who gave practical home safety tips, different towels, no roller towels etc. I colour coded everything for us In the bathroom so we have our own hand towels, which match bath towels, toothbrushes etc. Colour coding is something I’ll expect to use in our workshops too. But it really pisses me off how disparate any practical information is whether for work or home at the height of it all, let alone now they’re easing lockdown.

I’m half hoping retailers like John Lewis and H&M Or multinationals etc pave the way a bit better for social norms. In AUS NZ & the US in some places they’re mandating masks to enter their stores as well as the usual supermarket things. One beautify shop in Taiwan only lets people in if they have a temp check. In McDonald’s in Taiwan your food comes with a sticker telling you the names of the people that prepped your food, the time and their individual temps.

Making people feel extra safe, if only initially, is critical to easing lockdown. Polls say 1/2 of the U.K are still highly anxious. Practical Mitigation Advice is absolutely critical now.

My DH has been doing our shopping, mostly because it gave him an excuse for a walk in the fresh air. I don’t have any kind of anxiety issues and hadn’t really thought about what it would be like the first time I went to the supermarket again.. It was a bad choice of one to go as it was a smaller one, with narrow isles and some of the arrow directions didn’t make sense.

I found it more unsettling than I thought I would at first. . Maybe it is a good thing, in a way , that you have thought In advance that it isn’t going to be as per normal. Find out, if possible, exactly what their procedures are, like allocation of till places by staff , , screens around checkout staff etc so you aren’t confused about what do when everyone else does seem to get it.

I’m doing more of the shopping now and have chosen to go to a bigger supermarket with longer queues to get in, but wider isles and no directional arrows. Much more relaxed atmosphere and customers are being very sensible.

I had to go eventually as there were no delivery slots initially and when any were available I felt they should go to the vulnerable and elderly. Like a previous poster I hadn't been in a big shop since March 16th and on that date it was totally horrendous. People grabbing everything from infront of you , no loo rolls etc. So I was rather afraid of not being able to get out of the Tesco extra near us. However it's been absolutely fine-I go on Thursday at 7.30 am or earlier. No queues, not many people, follow the arrows, everyone is more mindful now. It's so much more pleasant-staff are great.

I was not in big supermarket since beginning of March. But I go almost daily to my local Budgens and it’s pretty normal as before corona.
The only difference is they have plastic shield on the till but that all.
No one way shopping..nothing.

I've been going since lockdown. I can understand people who are shielding not going but surely now you are additionally anxious about restarting.

Oh God no. I do Click and Collect now.

I will go back into the big supermarket if/when it's all back as it was.

It's a bit confusing. There are one way signs and arrows on the floors of some aisles but people don't follow them and some aisles don't seem to have arrows only crosses showing where you should stand. In some of them, it's impossible to keep 2m away from others all the time e.g. to leave you have to pass by other people. Ask your DH what your usual shop is like or ask local people which ones are easiest to deal with. It's just something new to get used to.

I’m with @BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz, I’d happily carry on queueing so the shop stays as empty as it currently is. And the stock levels are fantastic.

My Morrisons isn't any different apart from the odd person wearing a mask 🤷🏻‍♀️

I've not been in a supermarket since 9th March on the way home from work to panic buy the kids easter eggs because I knew i wouldn't be going shopping again for a very long time.

Since then I have only set foot in a m&s convenience store in a petrol station a couple of times, quite early in the morning when nobody else was around.

DS is shielded so none of us have been in a shop since mid March, we have been lucky to get priority delivery slots but even that has been tricky at times. I am anxious about the supermarket too, I think I will start with a basket first before I try a big shop, but I am sticking with deliveries for now.

It's a relief to read that it's not just me, I haven't been into a shop since early March either and it feels like the whole world has changed and I have no idea of the rules anymore.

We did a waitrose click and collect last week - It was the first time we'd managed to get a click and collect slot of any sort and the closest we'd got to supermarket shopping. I ended up hovering around about 20m from the outside queue that was in the carpark anxiously observing dh in the queue and hyperventilating whenever someone got close to me and terrified that he'd do something wrong.

I realise I need to work on this!

I'm going to try and see if I can pick up some bread from the corner shop this week I think.

No you’re not the only one. We’ll be relying on deliveries for the foreseeable.

I"ve made a map of my local Tesco with aisle headings, and added in the things I buy most often. Especially useful as the fruit and veg spans 3 aisles ( and I think the courgettes are in the "wrong" place)
I now write my shopping list in precise order so I don't miss anything and have to backtrack.
The only thing is I don't feel that I can pick through the packets choosing the steaks I like the look of, I just take the top one. But I only buy steak once a month at most!

I think one of the things that makes it harder is the understandable rule of only one person from the household in the shop at a time. So if I'm going to go in, I won't have anyone in there that can give off reassuring vibes.

I might ask a friend if they would be happy to be a customer at the same time, just to have a friendly presence. I think that might help.

Wow wasn't expecting this response so thank you all. Some really good ideas and suggestions which I will definitely think about doing. In our small town we only have two large supermarkets and one smaller one. From what my sister and DH say tesco out of those 3 seem to be the more organised and more reassuring. DH did go to sainsbury's in a neighbouring town to pick something up from argos and he said that was even better.

I have spoken to my sister and she has suggested when I'm ready that she does her shopping at the same time as me and she'll queue in front so I can follow her lead, which might help.

If I'd be able to go with DH for the first time might have helped but as its only 1 person per household and we don't have anyone for child care it's not doable.

Right at the beginning of all this I did have anxiety over the virus and had a few panic attacks during the night but I have worked through those issues putting into place routines for when we've been out for walks, when I've been at work etc. Our children have been amazing at knowing when to social distance when walking etc. I've also seen DH over the weeks go to supermarkets and he is still ok and I've been to work and I'm still ok.

I'm back in the school building for my normal hours this coming week (although not my class just yet) but I feel quite calm about it as I have had a hand/having a hand in designing the rules and changes in our school so know what the expectations are and how I will deal with the virus risk.

The same with most things, the more you leave it the harder it becomes, because I have been into school every week since lockdown I have got over those fears but having left the supermarket shopping for us long I have built it up in my head.

Thank you all

I’ve not been either- and what’s worse I’ve not been behind the wheel of the car

That was me until the cat needed the vet (bloody typical of him!) and it was strangely liberating! I've been going to the local corner shop though.

To be fair, I haven't been in a supermarket for years as we have deliveries. No doubt if I ever do venture back it'll be a complete culture shock!