To feel envious of my parents about impact of covid

[Napqueen1234]

I feel they aren’t being affected anywhere near as much as us and our generation generally.

Both my parents still work (early 60s) jobs stable and not affected by Covid. Live in a large house with huge garden (benefitted hugely from rises in property prices over the years). Can now meet and golf with friends. Will still be able to afford holidays in future even if much more expensive.

We have two young children (one 6mo) and I have quite bad PND not least due to the lockdown/whole situation. On mat leave and struggling in small house with yard entertaining them. Likely to be huge recession which could affect us (DH works in construction) and also likely stop us being able to move to a larger house or extend any time soon.

They keep saying be positive and we will get through it and I just feel like screaming of course you bloody will but the economy and world will be screwed for years which will have far more impact on us. I cry at the impact it will have on my kids early years and Education. This is just a rant really as I’m struggling to cope.

Well, you’ll probably be in their position (possibly even literally if they leave the house to you) at the same life stage. I can’t get too excited about it - I’ve chatted to my parents generation a lot about what different time periods were like. In the 70s with toddlers my parents were dealing with three day week and rolling blackouts, and mortgage rates were astronomical. Maybe pause for a second and notice that the power hasn’t gone off, that we have many resources that just weren’t available at that point.
It’s easy to miss the bigger picture and assume that no one else has ever had it as hard as you etc etc.

I'm envious of you.

Many people will be as many are 'worse' off.

It's pointless to think that way though.

I fully understand you.

I remember around the time of financial crash, DP and I were just on the cusp of buying our first home, then the crash happened, the banks weren't lending unless you had a huge deposit (we didn't). My MIL (who is usually so on the ball about these things) couldn't understand why no one was buying houses.
I remember feeling that we were going to be left behind, but eventually things did pick up, the financial world did get back on its feet and we bought our house. We've been okay during this current crisis, I am worried about both of my DC's education - we just have to do what we can, the only obstacle we have is health related (hopefully shouldn't be too bad).

Without sounding cliched we will get through this but it is shit whilst it's happening.

But if you're a woman in your 30s you don't really need to worry about the virus killing you. If you're in your 60s that risk is much much greater.

I understand how you are feeling. I think it's quite hard as a "millennial" (I know the world loves that word!!!) As we face our second recession of our working life. Fwiw, I'm mid thirtys, have been unable to buy a home and we were finally planning that maybe, in 5years time, we might be able to buy a small home and whatcha know - recession hits again!!! My parents fully paid off their mortgage at 55, we will be lucky to have a 25% share in a home by then.

It's swings and roundabouts. I'm in my 60s and lucky I have a pension which isn't affected by any worries about job loss and I have a nice house with small garden, though I did not have this comfortable life when my kids were small and I am at much higher risk of dying ofthe virus than younger people.
One of my sons is happily working from home now so is saving time and money on commuting so he is also okay with the situation.

I am very glad this is happening towards the end of my working life (late 50s). Maybe your parents are grateful for what they have but are being sensitive to your situation by not banging on about how lucky they are.
I also am eternally grateful that I don't have young children (all late teens).

I think this is your pnd. Nothing much will change, consumerism will resume.

It is just a shit time all round.

I am very lucky I din't have to worry about my job, can wfh and have a garden but I worry so much about my childrens future after all of this.

It is utterly stupid to say things 'well at least you will survive if you get it' (i.e. think yourself lucky) well the fact is that most people will survive if they get it!

Also there is life other than bloody COVID-19. People are allowed other worries - I don't recall Boris standing up and saying 'We must only think about the virus, if you are not dead then you are lucky so no complaining!'

Although I wouldn't put it past him.

Do you think @fallfallfall? I agree @BriefDisaster Brexit was bad enough but covid has literally consumed everything. I can’t stop worrying about our and our children’s futures especially reading all the school threads on here.

Napqueen. I am your parents age and look at things differently. You have youth. You are very very unlikely to die of this whereas I am. Your children may catch it at school. They will be fine. You will get it from them and will probably be fine. Your parents may die. Your grandparents will die. The graph of deaths by age is not being acknowledged to its full extent.

Your parents don't represent all sixty somethings. Plenty others will be struggling in every way. Health, finances, family issues, all manner of problems. Likewise your life seems quite privileged compared to many including people older than you but living in cramped rented flats.

I also don't envy your parents or anyone else their age having to see the news about care homes. They will know that's potentially their fate in the not too distant future. The neglect of care home residents (including younger disabled people) and lack of value for their lives by the government has been laid bare for all to see by this pandemic.

I feel similarly about my PILs, OP.

I am fortunate in this current crisis.

I do think generally there is very little acknowledgement of the sacrifices the younger generations make for the older. But an awful lot the other way around. Children are giving up their education to save mostly older people. I think we need to understand that younger people really do need to be given a leg up after this. Maybe cancel Brexit...

I think OP's post applies more to Brexit (the impact of which the next generation will have to deal with).

Covid is literally killing older people

Not more of this inter generational hatred and trouble making.

Every generation faces its own challenges and everybody is an individual, not a cohort.

#Bekind.

Your parents didn’t cause Covid.

It really isn't helpful to envy others. My parents are far wealthier than us too, I am very pleased for them. They worked bloody hard and made a lot of sensible decisions. Neither came from wealthy families so are self made. Their large house and garden did not just drop into their lap!

This pandemic has adversely affected everyone, literally no one has been unaffected. It doesn't have to be a competition.

Maybe this might prompt a few more folk in the UK to query why the UK invariably seems to be far harder hit by economic recessions that similar countries elsewhere in Europe, and why it invariably seems to take use an eternity to recover compared to our peers.

Far too much borrowing, personal debt, living on the never never, and an expectation that life will perpetually be a never-ending cycle of betterment and accumulation of wealth.

It's not the fault of the individual, but we get the politicians we deserve, and broadly speaking, the society we ask for. When it inevitably goes tits up its a bit rich to start whining about the consequences when you're happy to reap the benefits in the 'good' times.