Mini hitlers

[creaturcomforts]

I had an experience yesterday that actually really upset me and made me angry. I am a single parent to a 12 year old daughter, I have tried to limit the times I go shopping as I hate it.

Yesterday me and daughter were queuing outside Sainsbury's and I asked her if she felt ok to wait outside on her own, she said no as she has been a bit anxious about going out and I said we will wait and see if they will allow her in with me, if not she would wait outside and I would be as quick as I could.

Anyway, just as we were getting to the top of the queue and I was going to ask if she was allowed in with me, a lady shopper just exiting started a tirade about how I couldn't go in as two people together are not allowed, you are not allowed in and literally shouting at us and launching off. I was so embarrassed and to be honest I didn't want a confrontation so I asked daughter if she could wait for me and she had no choice really.

I had to go in at that point and got everything and came out but was angry as it was uncalled for and not her place to say, daughter and me have been in lockdown together and I obviously can't leave her alone.

I found it aggressive and bullying that the customer felt the need to point out that I should not be going in with my daughter but I didn't want to leave her outside alone. What do others think?

Asda, Tesco and Co-op have all put out statements saying that single parents are permitted to shop with their children if that is deemed necessary.

Ignore, ignore and ignore some more OP.

Do not disclose your child's anxiety issues with a complete stranger - it's none of their damn business and you do not have to justify your actions to them.

Thank you defenbaker, yes I think the experience got to me, and I over reacted. Was I breaking quarantine? No we are both in the same household. Could the journey have been done alone? Yes, (but) daughter has been anxious and would not have wanted to be alone. I know it's not a massive deal on the face of it, but I think individuals should never make assumptions and take law into their own hands!

I would never pass assumptions on someone else without knowing the fu facts and I DO think people are too judgemental generally.

she was obviously not interested in Coronavirus spread just in being a bossy cow since she didn't know the situation.

Working in healthcare for longer than a decade I'm shocked that people are jumping on the bandwagon of knowing the 'rules' when I've had to observe them!!

The shouty lady was horrible. The other people in the queue should have intervened as well. Just forget about it.

I have asd and people like this are the reason why I have barely left the house since this started. I appreciate that people are scared and that can make them react aggressively, but I do supsect that some are just bullies looking for an excuse to have a go at other people.

I'm sorry this happened to you and your daughter, I don't have any advice, but you weren't the one in the wrong.

Your experience really doesn't compare to mass genocide.

Would rather leave a 12 year old at home safe than outside a supermarket where strangers are passing by? Just my opinion.

The woman was out of order and unhinged.

Personally, I favour just silently taking zero notice of such a ridiculous rant. Just a good stare at her with a raised eyebrow would probably have caused her to scuttle off when her rant fell on deaf ears.

I see parents with children of a variety of ages in the queue for our local Tesco. Nobody has so far batted an eyelid and nor should they.

I don't have kids but I guess 12 is the age where some will be ok being left at home, and others won't. Only the parents can really decide.

I am sorry that some busy body gave you a hard time, OP. You didn't do anything wrong and you don't have to justify yourself to other people.

To avoid having to go to the supermarket, have you looked at whether you can get Click and Collect? Around here, Asda and Sainsburys both have plenty of slots.

My issues aren't child related but I hate going into supermarkets so I've been doing a click and collect every fortnight then using the local Co-op, butcher and corner shop in between. I know that's not practical for everyone though.

This lockdown is driving people totally batshit crazy.

There are some people in life who absolutely revel in pointing out 'the rules' to others. I've been to a few different supermarkets since lockdown, and whilst they make you que to get in, I've been surprised at the number of people in the shop once you get in. People leaning over each other to get to stuff. It's a farce. I had to take my 7yr old with me on Saturday. I made sure he stuck right by me and that we stayed back from people. He's less risk than most as he hadn't been anywhere in 7 weeks.

If your DD isn't keen on being left alone, please don't worry about taking her next time. Whatever you do, there will always be a busy body know it all.

I'm more surprised that the other (and presumably sane) people in the queue didn't speak up on your behalf.

I had bad anxiety for years. Totally understand how your daughter feels.

I found my balls now and sticking up for people is one of my favourite ways to use them. Wish I'd been there.

She was really unfair creaturcomforts. It must have been really upsetting for your daughter and you. Also, seperatedswans, you should not be feel forced to avoid shopping too. Last week I stood behind a couple who used the queuing time to embark on a very public display of affection. They went round the supermarket together and then only split up to pay for their shopping! Nobody said anything. I agree with MsHeffaPiglet. I bet that woman would have said nothing to them.

No other tips apart from telling yourself you and your daughter have just as much right to shop as she does. I would say that it is much better to go in the afternoon than the morning (but before people call in on their way from work) and, if possible, to go to a smaller supermarket.

Some people just love telling others how to live their lives, they think they are right and everyone else is wrong. look at posters on here, ringing the police every five minutes. They are thoroughly enjoying lockdown. I stay well out the way, get on with my life and let everyone get on with theirs.

This pandemic has brought out some peoples inner "little Hitler"! I think you were within your rights to take your DD with you .I have had a bad experience as well ,and was almost in tears when one of the Supermarket Staff was very rude to me .I would maybe try a different store next time, or go early or later, and on less busy days if you can .Lots of people have very little power and want to feel important by telling others off! (just make a tit of themselves though!)

ToffeeYoghurtOf course it doesnt bloody well compare to mass genocide FFS! This lady and her daughter live here in the UK and this is upsetting for her today.Everything is relative ,and she said her DD suffers from Anxiety anyway .Idiots like this stupid woman make it a 1000 times worse!

Ignoring works best and pitying the people that have to live with Lady Rants-a-lot.

I'm opting for deliveries where i can get them. Not keen on taking the kids in as it will be stressful enough without moans and rants!

Practice not giving a fuck about what people think. I started doing this about 7 years ago and it revolutionised my life! I can now be quite rude whilst maintaining a plastic smile and using polite words to people like this. They don't expect to be challenged, I think, so when someone does I've found they back down extremely quickly. I can be really quite cutting now when I need to be, but often just a blank look or a 'wtf' expression is enough, maybe with an 'excuse me?!' or a 'and you are...?' thrown in. I wouldn't have even tried to explain to the security guard. I'd have walked in and only then if questioned would I have politely stated thag 'I'm a single parent and for various reasons daughter can't be left at home'. It helped me to play a character I think. So when I need to, I pretend I'm a right bitch or a really confident person (I'm not really at all!) and I act the part.

I second that you've got to learn to ignore other people.

Perhaps next time if you do need to say anything, ask "is she old enough to buy alcohol? If no, then she's young enough to out with you".