How are you managing to get through this?

[PurpleChevron]

Feel like I am losing the plot a little bit......I know most people will be feeling rather lost.
I am not sleeping too well.
I don't seem to have any routine or structure to my day, but I also don't know how to put one in place and stick to it.
I find it hard to concentrate on my work.

I made an effort this morning and got up, showered and put clean clothes on which definitely made a positive difference in how I felt.

What other things can I put in place to keep me going? I have a feeling its going to be quite some time before I am able to return to work so I need to sort myself out.

Do you have children? I suspect very marked difference between those that do and don’t in many cases.

Lot of routine here as I have two. Up, dressed, breakfast. I work out they in garden. School work, I do housework, break, school work, lunch, daily walk, school work, I do admin etc, reading, dinner, tv, they go to bed, I chill and then bed. Grocery shopping 3x a week.

Feeling fairly happy and settled and sleeping decently.

Be much kinder to yourself. This is a difficult adjustment.

Try to have some fun in your day. And also make sure you are grateful for things that come with lockdown, even if most of it is shit. So, lie ins? Not having to wear heels? Anything really. But try to enjoy some elements of it.

On a practical note, I have found it much easier now I have accepted that the old normal is gone for good, and started thinking about ways I can enjoy future normal.

Stopped reading or watching the news so much, has really helped my mental health at the moment. I also don't watch the daily update every day either now.

* I have found it much easier now I have accepted that the old normal is gone for good, and started thinking about ways I can enjoy future normal.*

.
It’s hardly been a month! Come off it. We will all be back to normal at some point in the next year at least

I have kids, my son is ok with getting on with work and my sister is helping him online with it.
My daughter has quite bad MH problems and is refusing to come out of her room. I managed to get her to do a bit of Maths yesterday afternoon but it took a lot of persuasion.
I am also trying to work from home around the kids.

I just feel like crap every single day. I don't feel like I am achieving anything about the basics of everyone being fed and watered. I have no motivation what so ever :(

I've gone the opposite way and am filling every minute of the day. It's exhausting and I know it isn't sustainable, but it gets me through the day and the weeks have passed quickly so far as a result. Hopefully we'll be given a bit more freedom soon and I can ease off before I burn out. When I'm under a lot of stress and/or my mood drops for a prolonged period of time I either get like you OP, or make myself mega busy. Basically, I either wallow or stick my head in the sand! I've found on balance busy is better, but I totally overdid it about 18 months ago and had a MH crisis as a result. I'm trying very hard not to return to that place!

I think recognising the pattern of how you are feeling and what you're doing/not doing is a huge step towards making positive changes though OP. The 'getting ready for the day' is a great idea. We have a loose kids' timetable for the day (which activity follows which, rather than set times) which might be an idea? We are also doing Joe Wicks most mornings as a. it's good exercise and the kids concentrate better when they've expelled energy, and b. it starts at 9am, so we need to be dressed, fed, and ready for then! Would a few small (and achievable!) written goals each day work?

I have a list of stuff I need to do today- simple tasks like put the washing away, touch up a bit of paintwork, put the dinner in the slow cooker.

I haven't done any yet! I am so annoyed with myself but I still can't seem to shake off this patheticness!

Gonna make myself a cuppa and see if I can use that as my motivations to get me moving.

I keep telling myself we'll be out of lockdown by June and therefore we are already half way through.

This may or may not be true, but in the absence of any timeline from the government I've given myself one.

Planning to go to a relatives holiday cottage first week of June if travel is allowed by then.

I know I'm setting myself up for disappointment if we are still on lockdown in June, but I think it's unlikely and I'll take the mental gamble to get through May frankly.

I've kept to a routine and exercise every morning, walk every afternoon, housework before tea. It's been ok so far but DS is 15 and independently doing his schoolwork, OH still going to work every day. Apart from the weird shopping it doesn't feel anything out of the ordinary. A bit like I just took the school summer holidays off work except we haven't been anywhere.

I don't think I have every realised how much i rely on the routine of day to day life. I think this has knocked me for 6, I had plans to get fit and sort my house out when this first happened but I haven't followed through with my intentions, my brain just feels like someone has pulled a cable out and its on a go slow. I feel very confused all of the time and groggy.
I have just forced myself to fold all the clean washing and put it away. I am going to hoover next and sort a small pile of paperwork/junk out. I don't understand why I am finding it all so hard.

Something personal.

Starting antidepressants for anxiety for the first time in my life has helped a lot. Wasn't coping at all before.

Adapting to a new routine of sorts.

Staying in contact with Family and Friends and being humbled by their kindness.

It's not lockdown that bothers me, well it does but only a little, it's the virus and the pandemic and the enormity and uncertainty of that which scares me.

I'm only just about managing. I cry once most days because work is overwhelming and I just can't keep my toddler entertained for 5 days a week. I'm still so excited for the weekends when I can get the housework done, have some wine in the evenings and video calls with friends. I'm very up and down - some days a complete mess, other days a bit numb with it all.

I'd like to give some advice but actually I don't have much, aside from keeping some sort of routine in the morning - get up, showered, dressed, brush your hair, etc. I find that makes a difference. Also I've been ordering some really lovely coffee which i look forward to each morning, it's the little things!

I'm very much looking forward to all this being over.

OP @PurpleChevron I don't want to be presumptuous, but could it be a possibility that you are or are beginning to get depression??

From what you write it sounds like it could be a possibility but I'm no doctor.

I think most people are struggling a lot with this whole thing, in different ways. It's completely normal that you are feeling this way even if it's not your 'normal' normal iyswim??

I recognise the absence of any motivation, wading through treacle feeling trying to do the slightest thing, and brain fog.

Things which maybe, possibly could help -

Speak to GP. I thought I'd be wasting their time and resisted for weeks but they were great.

Divide things into manageable chunks. Either one or two to-dos at a time then break, or say 30 mins doing stuff 30 mins break.

Promise yourself a treat after you've completed tasks. A film, chocolate, whatever you usually like.

Strike whilst the iron is hot. If you feel a rare sudden motivation, go with it.

Delegate. Depending on ages, Children can help out.

Vent to trusted Family and Friends. Mine have surprised me how much support they've given.

Don't know if this will help but I'm the same, was much much worse before getting help from GP (which I've never needed before), and these help me.

Hope you feel better soon..

It’s hardly been a month! Come off it. We will all be back to normal at some point in the next year at least

No we won’t.

So much has gone (Everyone in the office at their desks at the same time; Debenhams, Getting delivery slots; travelling abroad with confidence in the travel agent, and so so much more). And lots of new has come along (more respect for key workers, more WFH, more redundancy, fewer holidays, Zoom, and much more).

These are seismic changes. Old normal is gone. New normal might be better or worse. But it will be different.

I feel a bit wobbly some days but a loose schedule works. I am not working though so its just keeping the kids entertained and stopping them developing an xbox addiction.

Definitely get dressed every day. I'm just in trackies and a hoodie but I feel much worse in pjs. A shower helps...and don't put any pressure on yourself to go crazy with jobs around the house. I've done a few but only when in a positive mainframe and when I wanted to pass the time! Also, I don't put the tv on until 8pm as per normal.

I am not sure I will feel so good if this wet weather continues though. Lack of sun and fresh air is going to be difficult.

Joe Wicks has saved my lockdown I reckon. We do him at 9am which means I have to be up and breakfasted. Once it’s done I’m all sweaty which means I want to have a shower and get dressed. I then have a snack and start to look at work emails (not too much brainpower) by which time it’s pretty much lunchtime.

So I don’t feel like I’ve done much but actually I’m up, fed, washed, dressed and exercised by lunch which would probably not happen without Joe Wicks.

Following for ideas, at times i’m struggling

One thing that helps me is remembering that I sometimes need to just get up and do something rather than wait to feel motivated. The action needs to come before motivation sometimes instead of the usual other way round.

And Yes to rewards for doing things.

Break up tasks into small chunks

Good luck

Also agree with you @PersonaNonGarter

We won’t be going back to the same normal for a very long time, if ever

I have days where I feel quite level and others where I feel really low. I think most people are like this at the moment. I’m like you, have lots of ideas about doing stuff but don’t. Due to kids and the fact I’m still working (from home). I find either doing things first thing or straight after lunch is best for me. I don’t attempt anything after 4pm. I’ve totally gone off the boil by then. Take the pressure off yourself that you need to be achieving stuff. All these Facebook posts from people achieving lots of endlessly useful things are just a snapshot of their life. Small things that improve my mood - a bath or shower, doing a puzzle even just for ten mins, not going on my phone every two mins (find this hard but it defo helps my mental health) being outside for a walk however brief, having food in the house that I look forward to, having a tv series to get stuck into when kids in bed, having a call with friends. I also always feel better if I’ve had a bit of a clean or sorted a cupboard out that’s been bugging me for example. I did a wardrobe clear out and found stuff I’d forgotten about and got rid of old stuff. I was putting it off, but in truth it didn’t take me more than a couple of hours. And makes me feel good every time I open the wardrobe and am surprised at how tidy it is! A lot of us at just pushing along with this, I’m finding it much harder than a lot of my friends. I’m desperate to be in the house on my own and have some normality. And eat some food I’ve not cooked!!!

Exercise first thing every morning makes all the difference to my day

No we won’t. return to normal

So much has gone (Everyone in the office at their desks at the same time; Debenhams, Getting delivery slots; travelling abroad with confidence in the travel agent, and so so much more). And lots of new has come along (more respect for key workers, more WFH, more redundancy, fewer holidays, Zoom, and much more).

Debenhams closure - will have bugger all impact in normal life returning
Delivery slots will return to normal or additional companies will pop up to meet the additional need
Travelling abroad - so many have chosen to postpone rather than cancel (my self and everyone I know certainly have), and the lure of sun and a change of scene will draw those sceptical back, in time
Everyone I know, me included, are talking about how we can’t wait to hug and sit across one another over a coffee / dinner for a catch up. I suspect that shortly after pubs and cafes open - these places will be rammed!

Let’s revisit our differing views in a year maximum and sees who is right!

Well, the owners of pubs and airlines don’t agree with you. The tourist trade, hospitality etc are changed for a long time.

For example. British Airways is looking at making 12,000 (twelve thousand) people redundant. They do not think we will be going back to ‘normal’.

Surely you can see this downturn will have a lasting impact?

An very substantial impact yes
But you said “the old normal is gone for good” which is completely hyperbole.As it stands the vast majority of people will either not get corona or recover fully and not know anyone has has tragically passed away.

You will see - there will be a massive voice back in pubs and restaurants. Huge. We will disagree for time being, but human beings are enormously resilient and we like the familiar. This has been going on for week. Weeks! Good grief, that’s not going to change the world forever.
When schools settle back in, when the pubs etc open, lockdown will seem like a surreal short time of our lives.

“Bounce back”