Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Covid

Mumsnet doesn't verify the qualifications of users. If you have medical concerns, please consult a healthcare professional.

Shielding After The Lockdown

176 replies

Didkdt · 16/04/2020 15:19

As people go back to work and the children to school I suspect our shielding status will remain for quite some time.
I'm just not sure how it will work. I was feeling so twitchy with DH at work and the children at school whether they'd bring it home
Also at some point I want my life back. I want to go back to work.
I've always been careful to avoid people's germs before knowing a cold or chest infection could hospitalize me, it's just now hospital might not be able to fix me

I just wondered if people wanted to chat through how shielding will work when life starts it's new normal and we're stuck shielding.

OP posts:
AustBron · 19/04/2020 20:57

I am shielding due to lymphoma. My DH is shielding with me because our house is way too small for him to stay 2 metres away from me, and we only have one bathroom. He is currently working from home but eventually his employers will want him back in the office, when that happens he intends to take early retirement and we will manage somehow financially.

We are very fortunate in that we have a garden, only small but it does have high fences and hedges. I have a priority supermarket delivery weekly, our local butcher and greengrocer are happy to give free delivery on paid over the phone orders and there is a local small hiolder who will deliver eggs. But despite being so lucky compared to many of you, I am desperately unhappy at not being able to see my adult children. We have never spent Christmas apart, but I cant see the shielding being over by then and I just want to cry all the time about that.

The anxiety for the future is immense, I can't think how I'm ever going to feel safe outside my home ever again unless a miracle happens.

FourTeaFallOut · 19/04/2020 21:03

I don't think that they can compel you to stay in. I guess it will be guidance and you can make your own informed decision. Once they know how long immunity is conferred after exposure and we have access to antibody testing we can guage our risk better, I'm hoping all that will happen over the next few months.

NettleTea · 19/04/2020 21:06

my daughter is sheilding. Just today she asked me if she thought she would have any of the summer. I didnt have the heart to tell her that it may not be so for her. She has tickets for a festival to go with her friends at the end of August, I just cant see her not going, especially as all her mates go off to uni this year and leave her behind. If she cant see them at some point she is going to be devastated. She is 19 and has cystic fibrosis. She nearly dies twice already but, although it doesnt sound like it, she is pretty healthy most of the time - these were freak events and one not even CF related (sepsis from a kidney stone removal) Because of this she is quite 'live your life NOW' so Im not sure Id be able to physically keep her in.
She is due to start college this autumn too, so again.... she has already lost lots of years of secondary education due to illness and MH stuff

Tonemeth · 19/04/2020 23:57

I dont see how an entire group of economically active people can be expected to stay in till theres a vaccine.

I've worked out between SSP (hopefully) and the UC contribution I could live and eat. But no employer would keep my job for 2 years. Realistically I'd sell my ppp car back early as theres no point in a car I cant drive.

If this is the decision I'll be querying which condition has put me in the shielding group (it wasnt a surprise to get in given im asthmatic and seeing a respiratory consultant re lung damage, but I was in the first wave of letters and dont think my asthma is hugely serious) And have a frank discussion with my oncologist if possible. The biggest issue is ventilation probably wouldn't be an option for me, but the question I now have is, how likely is it I'd need it. Then its weighing up i guess. Of course it could be moot, my employer could refuse to have me back.

I've been thinking about this a lot!

Egghead68 · 20/04/2020 04:29

It’s really difficult. I am partially self-employed (through an agency) and will lose that work if I can’t return by July. I also work in the NHS and I expect they will stop paying me full-time if I can’t return in person this summer (most of my work can’t be done remotely).

I live alone in a flat and I am not sure if I would cope psychologically with another year in isolation.

I probably have some immunity to the virus having had/got it.

I think I may need to take my chances and go back to work.

FourTeaFallOut · 20/04/2020 13:03

I'd love to know how many of us there actually are though. I there are 1.5 million of us -ish. Most will be retired, some will be children, of those who are working age some will already have given up work due to ill health. So, what would that leave us with? Someone must know.

Egghead68 · 20/04/2020 13:56

Yes I would guess there are about 500,000-700,000ish of us in employment. A small enough group that perhaps the government will pay 80% of our salary if we have to stay home (fingers crossed).

Glittercandle · 20/04/2020 14:00

Egghead68 they would also have to take into consideration financially supporting the parents of children who are shielding and are too young to be left home alone.

Egghead68 · 20/04/2020 17:40

Yes absolutely.

AuntieSocia1 · 20/04/2020 18:13

Had a call from my GP surgery today. Basically asking if I'd want hospital treatment/ventilation and resuscitation. Also asking if I had a will and power of attorney. All very sobering. I think this must be standard practice for all high risk people but it's really hit me. As an aside, I don't have either of those thing and neither does my DH and with two young kids we really should.

I know it's a bit morbid but any online recommendations to get that sorted would be appreciated.

FourTeaFallOut · 20/04/2020 19:45

My surgery phoned me the other day to see if my asthma is currently controlled and there was no one asking about a DNR order. I'm going to make up a t-shirt that says, "Oi, you better resuscitate me!" in huge letters to wear to hospital if I have to go, just in case.

I'm not sure I need a will. If I die intestate then DH will get everything I have which is then plan in any case. I've been an executor for an intestate estate, it was fine.

AuntieSocia1 · 20/04/2020 20:15

The person who I spoke to said I already know the answer but I have to ask which made me think it was a standard set of questions.

They also wanted to make sure my next if Kim contact details were correct. Only sensible and tomorrow I'll be rational about it as nothing has actually changed but it has rattled me a bit

Tonemeth · 20/04/2020 21:27

AuntieSocia1 no offense meant, but what age are you? Lots of charities have partnerships where a lawyer will draw up your will for free. You dont have to leave a gift in your will or donate in exchange but its appreciated if you do. PM if you like i can point you in the right direction.

I had a call from my GP today too, total opposite. They just wanted to know if I had the support I needed and understood what I was being told to do.

Tonemeth · 20/04/2020 21:29

(They also do reduced power of attorney, tends to be for over 50s)

Tonemeth · 20/04/2020 21:32

www.mcclure-solicitors.co.uk/free-will-for-charity

Sorry for the triple post, realised i could share this without outing what (tiny) charity I work for. I'm not linked with mcclures in any way - I just know of them through work. I think they are Scotland only though.

bookworm14 · 20/04/2020 21:35

I have been told to shield. I have Crohn’s disease for which I take immunosuppressants, plus a congenital lung abnormality. I can only assume it’s the latter which puts me into the shielding category as the meds I’m on for my Crohn’s only put me at moderate risk. I currently feel completely healthy and have never had any lung symptoms (the abnormality was picked up by chance on an x ray).

I cannot possibly shield until a vaccine is found as I have a job and a mortgage. I will also be sending my DD back to school as soon as they open.

Tonemeth · 20/04/2020 21:41

It could be a combination of both bookworm - I have two conditions which wouldnt matter on their own but in combination mean i need to shield.

Work is a worry, I have a mortgage too. The more I read the more i think i would take a pay cut but wouldnt be willing to not see my loved ones (I live alone) for much more than 3 months.

eightytwenty · 20/04/2020 22:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AuntieSocia1 · 21/04/2020 00:12

@Tonemeth I'm 37 thanks a lot I will look into this. Didn't know where to start and didn't really want to fall down a googling wills hole with the way I was feeling.

Tonemeth · 21/04/2020 00:17

If you own your home you could just go to the lawyer you used for that.

I think different GPs are handling this very differently. It sounds awful, I'm not sure how I would have reacted re those questions. I was asked about my next of kin though.

Egghead68 · 21/04/2020 06:07

I cannot possibly shield until a vaccine is found as I have a job and a mortgage.

I think we are mostly in the same boat. They would have to give us financial compensation else people won’t comply.

I want to get my will done but the problem is that the signature needs to be witnessed and countersigned and I don’t see how we can do this with social distancing. I also can’t get to the postbox to post anything.

AshGirl · 21/04/2020 19:57

@Egghead68 There are protocols for witnessing signatures from a safe distance. Loads of people are getting wills done and your solicitor will give you guidance on how to sign and have your signature witnessed.

Egghead68 · 21/04/2020 20:24

Good to know @Ashgirl but I am not allowed to leave my flat and would have to persuade the witnesses to come over here just to stand in the corridor and watch me sign. I can’t think who I could ask to do that. Or is there an easier way?

AshGirl · 21/04/2020 20:37

@Egghead68 Sorry, I don't know your individual set up so can't advise on the specifics. Just wanted to let you know that there is a precedent for witnessing signatures from a distance and that firms are giving guidance on how to do this. Maybe a neighbour for you might work?

We are also shielding and need to do wills but very lucky to have a garden and may be able to get our neighbours to witness over the garden fence. These are strange times!

Didkdt · 22/04/2020 00:42

How are we all doing mental health wise.
I understand why the Irish call it cocooning because we are cocooned but for the first time today I had to give my head a wobble.
We are mitigating risks, solving challenges managing family life and it's kind of working but then I remember there's something out there that may kill me and I have no protection other than to hide. Then I wonder am I being silly, have i been exposed what's my risk.
I haven't been anywhere for weeks and weeks and I have weeks left to go. .
Then muppets come on TV/news media wannabe experts saying I'll have to fo this again and again for at least 2 years. .

OP posts: