Yup, depressed here too. Like @SabrinaTheTeenageBitch I'm worried that the life I imagined, to begin with, we'd be returning to is gone forever. I was ill for three weeks (not tested, not hospitalised) and GP in central London was pretty sure I (and my husband, possibly children) had the virus. So I have no fears for my own family. My only other immediate family member has definitely had it (hospital test) and made a good recovery. Even before the illness, and despite having some health anxiety in general, I was never especially concerned about getting it -- at my age, in good health, no co-morbidities, fit, etc the risk of dying is tiny.
But what's the end game? Was very depressed today to read the news about care homes, and to think about the suffering there, people dying without family members present, the NHS not even attempting to treat etc. Many of the most vulnerable (to this virus) people in our society aren't able to self-isolate, and they aren't being given hospital treatment. There were 250,000 people (2011 stats) in care homes. Are they just all being left to die? I would gladly go and volunteer in one and take advantage of my assumed immunity/ inability to spread the virus, but we don't have the testing to make that possible, so carers are going in infected...
Meanwhile, I'm trying to do ten hours a day of work in three hours while my husband valiantly battles with two small children (then we swap). I feel very sorry for my students (I teach in a university) and we are manifestly letting them down. I also worry that his career (he had just got to the point in early 40s of fulfilling a lifelong dream, in a field where that's hard to do) is tanking, even effectively over. We're shelling out thousands of pounds a month in nursery fees for a service we're not receiving (because paying seemed the ethical thing to do, to stop the business closing), and becoming increasingly anxious about the mortgage. My children were great for the first two weeks but perhaps our mood is affecting them, or maybe they're just bored without normal routine of friends, playdates, nursery, outdoor activities (we live in a small central London space).
I've suffered from depression since my early 20s. All controlled, or so I thought, after a slightly ropey postnatal period. Now, with all the routines, props, etc kicked away, I feel things sliding out of control. If we could have a clear message about the future, of the kind Macron gave today, I think that would help a lot. Without much faith in the government, much faith in the statistics we're given, or much faith in the possibility of a vaccine being found soon, all I can see is living in an increasingly dispiriting, lonely, financially oppressed, hopeless lockdown or semi-lockdown forever.