This lockdown is bringing out the worst in my neighbours - advice please!

[Hesterandfester]

Long time poster name changed as mentioning my work here but been here for years (Pom bear, etc)

I’m wide awake and have been for hours now, dreading the day ahead. I’m a key worker. I don’t work directly for the NHS but they are my client and I’m involved with the creation of the nightingale hospitals. As a result, I’m working from home working all the hours known to humans right now, I’m on my knees.

The street behind us and the street behind them have started this ridiculous habit of all sitting in their gardens which are back to back, all day long, sitting together but not in the same garden (if that makes sense). They all have low fences and some have raised seating areas. They can see each other and communicate. All fine. But one of these houses insists on playing an enormously loud, bass heavy stereo all day long to accompany the social. And I mean all day. Last week it was starting at 9am and yesterday we had 9 hours of it. The bass vibration goes right through the house like a heartbeat and you can’t tune out from it. It’s that doof doof doof doof all bloody day long.

I’ve been round to his house and calmly and politely asked him to stop. He told me he was bored and so was everyone else and that it was tough luck. That was after I’d been trying to work inside with the doors and windows closed and still I could hear/feel it.

I’ve tried earplugs. They don’t drown out the bass thump and I’m afraid I also don’t see why I should have to spend all day with earplugs in? Plus I have young DC so it’s not very practical. I’ve tried white noise and so forth but again, this is heavy bass and it just leaches through it.

I’m exhausted and emotional and I know that, but this can’t be okay. I literally feel like I’m going to pop. What can I do?

I would be tempted to drop a note in all the other houses participating in the social, explaining you are a keyworker and are working from home setting up NHS nightingale, that the one neighbour has refused to turn his music off even when asked nicely, that you can't work or have your very important video calls to set up NHS Nightingale with the music on, and if the rest of them could ask him to turn his music down or preferably off while they are having their social. Don't mention your kids etc as someone will say they have kids too and don't mind it.

Play the NHS angle and bank on the rest of the neighbourhood shaming him.

I hate that kind of antisocial music that rocks people's foundations because you just can't avoid it. He should be wearing headphones if he wants to blast it.

Ideally you can get half the street saying "oi Dave, what the fuck with the music, you know Hesterandfester is trying to set up NHS nightingale over there"

Call the police and make a complaint mentioning you are key worker

www.gov.uk/report-noise-pollution-to-council

I was going to suggest the same thing. Peer pressure - a note through the door of the other neighbours or a post in the local Facebook group.

Call the police

What a knob. So arrogant to assume everyone wants to listen to his playlist.

I don’t have any advice, but you have my sympathy. Every single day for the last week one of my neighbours has been playing music so loud I can hear every lyric from inside my house with the windows and doors closed. I’ve been wfh some days (again, not NHS, but an allied profession), and the constant music is driving me mad. Similarly, I’ve tried ear plugs but they hurt my ears and I still get the thumping bass. I’ve actually had a few meltdowns because I just wanted some silence. It’s too much constantly.

I don’t even care about not being able to open my windows, one of my other neighbours has had bonfires every afternoon so I wouldn’t open them anyway. 🙄

I haven’t tried approaching my neighbours because tbh I’m scared my car will get damaged or my house broken into or something. My only hope is that it starts raining, although doesn’t look likely.

I just can’t fathom how anybody could think this is remotely acceptable or appropriate behaviour.

I feel so guilty asking the police. I was going to ask the PCSO directly but the local page to contact them has been temporarily removed. We don’t have a local FB page - we do have a residents association but those wheels turn very slowly. Sometimes we bump into the pcso when our walking but ironically the last 4 days I’ve not seen her.

I think maybe I should ‘innocently’ knock on one of the other doors joining in if it starts today and ask again. I don’t know what else to do but it’s literally making me boil. I’m having such an adrenalin response to it (like a fight or flight feeling) probably due to cumulative stress, but what I could really do with today is my one day off work (well, semi off work the phone will ring!) being peaceful.

There is probably more than just you who is not too fond of it. I wouldhate it, and I don't even work at the moment! Can't imagine everyone else loves bass vibrations for hours and hours on end. Please report it!

Oh fish I’m just the same. I can’t escape it’s so claustrophobic. And now I’m anticipating it even when he’s not doing it because it’s got me on high alert. And yes the same - although I live on an okay road this road behind me isn’t quite the same and the people generally aren’t very nice.

If I were to put notes through it would have to be anonymously as I would be scared of retribution. Pack mentality I fear.

Yes to both ideas mentioned above!

The sooner it starts pissing it down with rain like normal, the better imho.

OP I feel for you. My next door neighbour has music on all day every day. I wfh and the walls are constantly thumping. I've told her several times her music is too loud, but nothing changes.

Now with lockdown and warm weather, it's 10 times worse as she's opened all her windows and turned it up so she can have music in the garden.

I'm plucking up the courage to ask for a music-free day today. All I wanted to do yesterday was relax in my garden. I had to give up and go indoors. My head was pounding

It's so, so inconsiderate. I have been in touch with my local residents association and am hoping they can help.

You can't be the only one being disturbed in your neighborhood. I bet there are others just trying to get on and the noise pollution is making them nuts. Shout out of the window. Scream and holler. Threaten to call the police. Be as unhinged as you like. When this is over people will put it down to stress. Say that not only are you working on the Nightingale you know that other neighbors are in ICU on nights and just can't get any sleep - would they want their family to be treated by someone who has had no sleep?

Your local Council environmental health department should be able to deal with this. Ring them to see if they are still working.

Just knowing I’m not being a muppet is helping, thank you. Because no one else seems to be complaining was making me feel like I should just suck it up. Honestly my blood pressure must be through the roof. I’ve had tingling fingers and a racing heart.

Council is an option but it takes months - you have to keep a diary and record it - they won’t do anything instantly. Our local police website also says music is not within their remit but maybe the gathering is? If it was at the front of their houses would it be classed as a street party?

If they are all within their own properties and more than 2m apart from each other, I don't think there would be a problem even if they were in front gardens. If households are mixing, then yes, there would be a 'gathering' which police could deal with.

100% phone the police to report an illegal gathering.

bang on 10am it started again

I really feel for you. I’ve had inconsiderate neighbours and I identify with that feeling of being on high alert for any noise.

I don’t know what to suggest, but bumping your thread in the hope someone else has ideas.

I think there will be a huge increase in properties going on the market as soon as the economy allows, due to twatty neighbours. I just hope I don't end up with yours or you with mine OP!

Having lived with noisy neighbours in the past I know well that feeling of stress and high alert. I have so much sympathy for you! Yes I would contact the police and go down the route of it being a street party as that is something they “should” deal with.

There will other people feeling the same as you. One summer our neighbours out back had parties in the garden virtually every night. One night they were doing karaoke at 3am and I lost it and shouted “shut up” (surprisingly they did!) and the next day, both my immediate neighbours thanked me!

Well I’ve been round!!! Again!!!! This time it was dolly Parton at volume 200 asking us to ‘stand by your man’ with his vocal accompaniment. I knocked at the front and I said ‘it’s your friendly neighbour again, here about the music’ he said it CANNOT believe you can hear it’ (quite defensively) and I explained it’s the bass, thumping, and was about to explain about my job and my stress and plead to his (non-existent) better nature. But he shouted ‘I’ll turn it down then you moaning tart’ (charming!!) and slammed the door shut!!

And it has gone down, for now. So maybe the answer is that I keep having to do that?

I really feel for you. We had the same problem in one house and it was awful! I honestly would go as far to say that it totally affected my mental health. We spoke to them over and over and had no response from them then I'm ashamed to say one night I just flipped. Was so unlike me but I was honestly going to go into his house and smash his sound system up I've never had such a angry reaction to anything like it before.
Luckily for me he went from being the big man to being terrified and we never had to hear the music again (our living rooms were joined and I could be in my door stairs toilet three rooms away from the party wall and could tell you from the vibrations that he had turned his music on!!)
Even more luckily they moved a few months later as there was obviously a bad atmosphere after that night.
I really hope you manage to get it sorted