Long Distance relationship and corona

[wonkypictures]

Is anyone else finding their LDR relationship being tested during Corona?

I'm in a relationship with a man in Paris (I'm London) and have been for almost 6 months. Pre-lockdown we saw each other every 10 days or so (we work together) but I'm finding this all a real struggle. We WhatsApp constantly and FaceTime regularly but not knowing when I will next get to see him is difficult.

I'm worried that even when lockdown is over we won't be able to travel, or seeing each other will count as leisure travel and will be disallowed.

The only slight saving grace is that Eurostar rules might be laxer than flights. And caveating this by saying I know the lockdown is essential and I am otherwise stringently sticking to the rules!!

Oh thank God someone who I can relate to. I've been in an LDR for almost 4 years with a Turk, getting married next year. Last saw him at the end of February and I'm terrified how long it might be until I see him again 😢😢

Me too. I live in the Far East and my boyfriend is in Madrid. God knows when we will see each other. Last saw him at departures at LGW , as i cried my eyes out on 16th Msrch. Very unlikely to see him for another 4 weeks, minimum. Though he remains hopeful possibly just to make me feel better.

He hates the phone too, which was fine with busy lives but now just makes me feel so sodding lonely. Just wo or three long video messages a week. The time difference is also a bitch. Gah

The future quarantine restrictions on travellers, worry me greatly

@sofato5miles I last saw mine at dalaman departures on February 28th as I cried my eyes out too, so I know how you feel. (He'd asked me to marry him only 6 days before that on my 31st birthday) At that point I was expecting it to only be 30 days until we were together again (was due to fly out on March 29 with my DD8) and then it all went to shit and ive no idea whats going to happen. It's just so nice to see there's others in the same position as me because NOBODY I speak to understands 🙈🙈

Ahh the crying in departure lounges 💙 it was in Portugal for me, we were there at the beginning of March for a long weekend for his birthday.

I am also hugely worried for travel restrictions post-lockdown I wonder if there'll be some kind of guidance for people like us?

And congratulations @Iamclearlyamug!!!!

I haven’t seen mine since feb 16th! Working away and it’s now July at the earliest for him due to the difficulties with work and travel!
Cannot believe it and even if he does get him he lives 3 hours away and I worry that we won’t be allowed to travel between cities even by car!!!!!

Everyone I talk to about it just shrugs and tells me to deal with it (they all live with their other halves)

My bf is in the US and I'm in the UK, last saw him 23rd Feb, was due to go over in a couple of weeks, but now have no idea when I'll see him again.

I normally cope with the distance by having the next trip planned, so finding this situation quite difficult.

@Azandme that's exactly how I normally deal with the separation, I always have the next trip planned before I go on the current one if you see what I mean 🙈🙈

@Doingmyownheadin ugh I know, it's easy when they're snuggled up with their OH every night isn't it 😡

@wonkypictures I'd love to think there'd be guidance for people like us but unfortunately I don't think it'll even be thought of, we'll kind of just slip through the cracks 😔😔

Do any of you guys feel like you're judged as selfish for being desperate for flights to start again? I do, people tell me that if I fly as soon as there's the option to then I'm contributing to further problems and more deaths 😢😢 like i don't have enough else to be upset about

@wonkypictures bloody departures at airports. Tried to imagine a black and white war movie at the time, but know it was northface jackets, rucksacks, and ugly tears.

@Doingmyownheadin July now looks realistic. How depressing is that. And YY to people tucked up at home with their other halves having no clue. I have lockdown, 3 kids and really miss my OH and do not know when i will see him again.

@Azandme yep, the next trip and the countdown makes it easier to manage. The unknown is just shit

@Iamclearlyamug do you know when you will get married?

My OH is ex military, so is used to being off for weeks and is an extremely self contained and resilient man (though pleasingly latin, he cried at our last goodbye too). It's so hard to be stoic. He's a pilot so looks like he has no job to return too. A widower too, whose parents helped him with his small children, so that responsibility on top. We thought that we had enough problems to overcome. Then this fucking awful disease.

and i really miss the sex 🤣

@sofato5miles we were aiming for October 2021 so not unrealistic but difficult to start any planning when I can't be there. Frankly given how shit this whole situation is I'd be happy to just do it the minute we see each other again with no guests or party 😂😂 but any one who knows anything about Turkish or middle eastern weddings knows that's just not an option 😂😂

Oh and yes yes to missing the sex 🙈🙈

It’s just a strange thought not knowing when I’ll ever see him again. Thing is he is at his normal place of work and really really busy so we can’t even chat more. Does anyone else find it a struggle trying to maintain things mostly through WhatsApp! He is different from me and doesn’t see the distance or the unknown having any effect on us whatsoever so if he can’t talk much then I haven’t to overthink!
Think this lockdown and long distance is starting to show up my needy side

@Doingmyownheadin I completely understand the feeling needy. It is hard to try to be stoic and stay attractive and upbeat. These are such trying times. I have started doing yoga and doing other self improvements that help me use this time wisely to make myself a better person. Which has a win, win for me and possibly my relationship overall

@Iamclearlyamug i get the wanting to get married straight away but at least you have a great end goal

I’m in a LDR - both in the UK but still 300 miles apart. She moved the week before lockdown started to take care of her terminally ill mother.

Originally we were meant to still be seeing each other a couple of times a week when she planned to come up to work in the office. Now I have absolutely no idea when I’ll see her again as I’m a key worker and close contact with the public is unavoidable so even if lockdown lifts, it wouldn’t be safe for me to visit. I’m finding it extremely difficult.

Welcome @Foreverlexicon any separation is hard and i am sorry to hear of the added emotional burden of your girlfriend's mother's terminal illness😪

@Foreverlexicon welcome to our little club and I'm sorry to hear of your difficulties 😔😔 hopefully we can all support each other

Seriously way too much investment for 6 month of dating. I wouldn't WhatsApp and FaceTime constantly. He's a boyfriend not your husband or fiancé. Don't think I'd WhatsApp my husband that much. Get busier otherwise one or both of you will both be bored witless before lock down is over. Men fall in love in your absence

@covidconundrum are you in this situation out of curiosity? Some people in LDRs will really struggle with this change especially if they usually see each other regularly. And for the record my fiance and I talk constantly throughout the day and have at least 1 video chat too - not bored yet and it's been 4 years. Please don't downplay other people's feelings

@covidconundrum - you and your OH might not talk much, but my OH loves talking to me and hearing about my day, and I love talking to him. We haven't run out of things to say in over a year, and miss each other when we can't call due to work or events etc.

We have enough absence already thanks... 🙄