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Covid

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Original poster

My parents are having a new floor laid

15 replies

MrsKoala · 05/04/2020 11:04

My parents had a bad flood in their house during the recent storms. It's resulted in a lot of damage and their floor being ripped up and them living in a pretty horrible mess. The floor was due to be laid in a few weeks and they are proceeding.

They have been isolating for 3 weeks. They are over 70 and Dad has copd and heart and health problems. I have been doing their shopping once a week at the same time as ours and other than that we haven't been out.

Their current plan is to drive their dog to the kennels, then have the floorer come in over 2 days to do the floor. The floorer will have been to the suppliers for some materials and probably been in contact with a few other people. Then drive to the kennels to collect their dog when it's done. They say they will stay upstairs while the floorer is there but I find it very hard to believe my mum will not be popping down to make him tea and sandwiches and dad wont want to 'give a hand'.

The alternative is I offer to have them here at my house. I have 3 small children and H. We have all been home since school broke up (apart from me having 2 trips to the supermarket) which by then will be about 5 weeks. If we completely isolate from now till 25th April (we have enough supplies) and I drive over pick my parents and dog up bring them here, the floorer lets himself in and does the work and then I go over and sanitise the fuck out of everything before I drop them back.

Obviously I have been pleading with them to postpone it, said it isn't essential etc. but they are adamant they are having it done as they can't live with floor boards up etc for any longer - especially during lockdown.

So while I don't want to break the rules I am thinking this puts my vulnerable father at less risk.

I feel so torn and annoyed.

OP posts:

louise5754 · 05/04/2020 11:15

Absolute nightmare. I feel for you that they have put you in this position.

DamsonDress · 05/04/2020 11:26

My parents had a floor fitted too. Also high risk. For their own MH I had to let them get on with it - and their new floor did give them a lift.

They knew to keep their distance, left payment out before he arrived and left him to it. They wiped door handles and mopped floor after he left as we thought it would increase the risk to them if I went over to do it.

They were fine after.

DamsonDress · 05/04/2020 11:32

Oh and we also contacted the floor company beforehand to tell them that parents were vulnerable, make sure they understood guidance, and were happy to do it, etc, etc We discussed what measures would be in place - back door open, money left out... to cut down on interaction when fitter there.

BiggerBoat1 · 05/04/2020 11:34

They should be delaying. It is not an essential and they are putting themselves and others at unnecessary risk.

Original poster

MrsKoala · 05/04/2020 11:57

The floorer isn't from a company but a mate from the pub/neighbour. My dad was an electrician so he knows lots of trades and I know will want to help.

I understand they should postpone Bigger - but they wont.

OP posts:

EL8888 · 05/04/2020 11:59

This sounds like the kind of thing my mum would do. It’s unwise but they have the right to make unwise decisions. I wouldn’t personally get involved in the logistics of it, their choice = their risk

LittleLittleLittle · 05/04/2020 12:01

Leave them to it and keep your children protected.

Your parents are adults who have the mental capacity to make their own choices, your children do not.

MitziK · 05/04/2020 12:04

It's probably not safe for them to continue living where there isn't a floor, though - the risk of trips or bumps/cuts/infected splinters needing a visit to and potential stay in hospital would be a problem, too - and the dust and possible mould/dog hair being kicked up and not cleaned properly wouldn't exactly help somebody with COPD.

It's not ideal - but neither is how they are right now.

BiggerBoat1 · 05/04/2020 12:07

It’s unwise but they have the right to make unwise decisions.

No they don't. The Government has set out vey clear rules. There are things we're simply not allowed to do at the moment. This is for everyone's good, so that the NHS don't get overwhelmed.

It is time to follow the rules and stop being selfish.

Original poster

MrsKoala · 05/04/2020 15:24

But that's the thing Bigger. They can make this decision regardless of the rules. They don't see it as being selfish. They see having a floor as pretty essential. They were totally wiped out emotionally by the recent floods and being in isolation with a house in this state is beyond reasonable to them.

Little - while I understand that sentiment and I am veering in and out of it, another part of me is saying that if they get it my dad will get very ill and maybe die but the chances of us getting it from them is less and the chance if we did of us dying is less too.

My children and I have no other family but my parents, who they are very close to and the thought of them getting corona when I could have prevented it is unbearable.

If they come and stay here and get it from us I will never forgive myself and if they stay home and get it from the kennels or the floorer then I will never forgive myself. (the kennels is a lady who boards the dogs in her own house so I know my parents will go inside when they drop off and collect)

OP posts:

DressingGownofDoom · 05/04/2020 16:25

Can't you take the dog? They get to swerve the kennels and stay at home then with minimal contact.

Original poster

MrsKoala · 05/04/2020 16:46

hmmm maybe. I'd be reluctant to because its an untrained pain in the ass. It's their 'baby' so I leave the dog control to them. But maybe in this case i'd think about it for 2 hellish days.

OP posts:

MereDintofPandiculation · 05/04/2020 17:26

but I find it very hard to believe my mum will not be popping down to make him tea and sandwiches and dad wont want to 'give a hand'. Even if they do, the floorer will be wanting to keep his distance and will probably refuse tea. Had a boiler engineer last week (and before anyone criticises, the ability to have a shower is quite important to a shelf-stacker handling food and working within smelling distance of the public), and he insisted that no-one should be in the same room as him.

Spodge · 05/04/2020 17:54

Keep away. Do not intermingle households. That's far more dangerous than the floor man coming round to do his job. Read your parents the riot act about staying upstairs, because it's for the man's benefit as much as theirs. If you are able to get contact details for the floor man then contact him in advance and read him the riot act as well.

Summersunandoranges · 05/04/2020 18:09

Leave them to it. They are old enough to face the consequences.

My granny does this. It sends me round the bend. I’ve had to step back. She has fought off pneumonia three times in the last eight months and is 88.

The other night she was on the phone wanting me to deliver Easter eggs to all her grandchildren. 17 grandkids. I said no because of the obvious reasons so she said she would hand deliver then herself then.

I just replied with ‘ok’

If she does it it’s off her own back

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