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Original poster

A bit morbid - but preparing just in case

18 replies

Witchlight · 02/04/2020 19:40

So DH and I already have wills in place. We’ve just spent the day listing pensions, insurance policies, shares, accounts etc along with reference numbers and contact numbers. It is to make it easier for DS if anything happens.

What else has anyone else thought of?

OP posts:
Quichelover · 03/04/2020 07:41

That is sensible.
Swedish death tidying up. I know its a pain with no way to donate or get rid of junk, though.
Funeral cover/plans?
Letter to children?

hepburnmed · 03/04/2020 07:47

Power of attorney?

Tigerty · 03/04/2020 07:51

Thought of it but haven’t got much of it together so useless at the moment. Must to that this weekend. I have started going through my filing, there’s a lot of rubbish from the last 6 years to shred and throw out.

LazyFace · 03/04/2020 07:51

That's the responsible thing to do. I wish I could convince my husband to do make one but no...

UnrulySalvia · 03/04/2020 07:56

We're not married and expecting a baby. DP "proposed" by telling me that he'd researched legislation for emergency weddings so that if he's at death's door in hospital we can get married and I won't have to pay tax on the inheritance. So romantic!

definitelygc · 03/04/2020 07:57

I don't know the specifics of what she wrote but I know that my grandma had laid out guidance about what types of medical intervention she would and wouldn't want to be given if she was in a state where she couldn't make those decisions for herself. She was very clear that she would rather die than receive medical intervention that would leave her with a very low quality of life or seriously brain damaged. It made it much easier for us to talk to the doctors when she was eventually dying in hospital. Even before this outbreak I was thinking it's probably sensible just to write one of these anyway as you never know what could happen.

BuffaloCauliflower · 03/04/2020 07:57

Bloody sensible, and thank you. When my Dad died there was no information about anything anywhere and it took two months of detective work whilst grieving to figure it all out. Was a nightmare. I wish everyone did as you have!

CaptainBrickbeard · 03/04/2020 08:03

Woke up in the night thinking about this. DH has asthma and I’m overweight. We had a big change in life circumstances six months ago and need to make wills to reflect this. I’m guessing solicitors will be working from home and we could probably arrange it online now. I need to look into it.

mumsiedarlingrevolta · 03/04/2020 08:13

We had the talk the other day. exchanged passwords on everything-never really kept secret but just in case. We have wills, power of attorney etc sorted.

As I have seen this go badly I have divided up some jewellery for DC-not everything because most of it not worth it but have diamond earrings that I inherited from late MIL and said DS's have one each to make an engagement rings for the future and DD have my engagement ring-that sort of thing.

Think a letter to each DC a good idea-

Better to do it preventably when you can think about it calmly and in a measured way and discuss than under duress.

Fingers crossed we don't need it

catscatscatseverywhere · 03/04/2020 08:16

Sorry to ask, but do you have any pets? If so their situation must be sorted out too. Let’s hope for the best, but prepare for the worst. Sensible solution. Take care and don’t let the bug catch you x

user1493413286 · 03/04/2020 08:18

I think in general something like that is wise; when my dad was diagnosed with terminal cancer he wrote loads of things down in a book such as that (even how to work the lawnmower) and it took a lot stress away.
DH and I are in our thirties and when someone we knew died last year also young I realised i had no clue what kind of funeral DH would want. We often don’t like talking about death in Britain but we will all die at some point so it’s not bad to do these things.

BeyondMymymymyCorona · 03/04/2020 08:19

Will emergency weddings still take place atm? Given they have been stopped in general and visitors are restricted?

I'm due to get married soon-ish and my biggest worry right now is dying before giving DP legal rights as my wife.

Sloff · 03/04/2020 08:35

I made a living will many years ago. I am not even sure anyone would find it on my medical records now. There are people that know my wishes and I have reminded them that there is no point in me hanging about and taking up space. I may as well shuffle off and get it over with. TBH it would be a a relief.

With that in mind I am updating my paperwork, I discussed it last week. I am also trying to sell as much online as I can so that there is less stuff left to be sorted out, and if I am still here at the end of this I will have less crap to deal with.

I remember my father going through all his belongings and tidying everything up when he reached a certain age.

definitelygc · 03/04/2020 09:24

There are people that know my wishes

I know this is a really morbid discussion but you really need to have it written down and give it to one of your family members. I've had personal experience of this and the doctors won't take any notice of family members saying "this is what they would have wanted" without some sort of written record of the fact. Otherwise family members could just be getting rid of someone they see as a burden.

Original poster
Witchlight · 03/04/2020 23:22

Glad others are thinking along the same lines. We have a todo list now.

Letter
funeral wishes
Financial and health poa.
Access to digital photos/emails social media.
Making sure any death in service instructions are updated and accurate .

Only child, so will all be his - hopefully in the distant future. But just in case......

Thanks for the input. There were things we hadn’t thought of.

OP posts:
Essexgirlupnorth · 03/04/2020 23:24

Only got round to sorting our wills a few months ago got the paperwork through the post today but can't get them witnessed while we are in lockdown so they aren't really much good

Original poster
Witchlight · 03/04/2020 23:26

Then we just have to have the conversation telling him where the documents are......that’ll be jolly.

OP posts:
INeedNewShoes · 03/04/2020 23:28

Any medical conditions that your DC have

A second choice of guardian for DC in case the first choice aren't in a position to look after DC

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