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Is anyone else having problems with elderly relatives?

4 replies

Mintychoc1 · 25/03/2020 12:24

My Mum is 80, overweight and high BP - so reasonably high risk.

She lives 2 doors down from me and my 2 kids (ages 14 and 10), so we see her a lot. I'm a single parent.

I'm at work (I'm a GP) and the kids are at home doing school work. I've asked her to stay away and keep contact to a bare minimum, if at all - but as soon as I go to work she goes round there to spend time with the kids.

I've just had a big row with her about it, trying to explain that it is to protect her, because the kids and I would most probably recover from coronavirus, but she may well not.

She just gets angry with me, says I'm being unreasonable, and that as long as she's a few feet away from the kids then it'll be fine. No amount of quoting rules and stats is helping.

I'm trying to work but I can't stop worrying about what is happening at home.

Both my kids could go to school but that would only get them out of the house for a few hours, and would expose them to more risk than they already have from me, so i'd rather avoid it. They're both stepping up, taking care of themselves, doing their school work - it's my Mum who isn't "cooperating". They know she's not meant to be there but obviously she's their Gran and they can't tell her to leave!

I'm at a loss! I just want her to not get ill.

OP posts:
AnneJeanne · 25/03/2020 12:29

I think you either accept that this is what she’s going to do despite the possible consequences or you take away her key. It’s infuriating behaviour being exhibited by so many of the elderly.

forrestgreen · 25/03/2020 12:37

Get the kids to lock the door and put a note on it. Tell the kids not to answer the door. If a gp can't practice what we're all preaching it's a poor do.
She'll have to suck it up

niffynoonoo · 25/03/2020 12:42

does she have a key OP? if she does, have you a key that can in the lock? then she`ll not get hers in!

tell the kids not to open the door to her.

Toothsil · 25/03/2020 13:39

Oh yes. My 95 year old grandma who has recently had pneumonia, had her hairdresser in to cut her hair yesterday afternoon.

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