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Child Arrangements Order

3 replies

QWE96 · 23/03/2020 13:01

I have a Child Arrangements Order with regards to DS having contact with his dad. It determines that DS lives with me but sees his dad twice a week with overnights once a week beginning next month. Contact is positive but here are my concerns:
We live with my parents; one has severe COPD, the other leukaemia. Both in the vulnerable category for the Coronavirus. DS's father is a key worker and is not taking the situation seriously. He thinks it's been blown out of proportion and he's not going to change habits because of it. Would it be unreasonable to postpone contact until safer to do so with the view that contact be made up at a later date due to the risk this contact may pose to my parents?
I've arranged for legal advice and have an appointment in the next few days but wanted to know if anyone is in a similar situation?

OP posts:
flissity · 23/03/2020 13:28

I don’t have any advice as fortunately my DD’s dad is taking it really seriously. I am pregnant, so until we had a chat about it all, I was also concerned.

Surely your parent with leukaemia will be one of the 12 week ‘sheilding’ People. So you can’t have people coming and going in the house?

catsmother · 23/03/2020 13:38

What you're suggesting is the ONLY sensible thing to do in current circumstances.

People like your ex can bleat all they want about it being unfair, or what his 'rights' are but these are extraordinary times and health comes before anything. Even maintaining face to face contact with non resident parents. Unless absolutely necessary, and this isn't, we keep our distance.

You have no idea who or where or what safety measures your ex is taking so exposing your child to a.n.other person, even if it's their dad is yet more risk. If he wants to fuss about it and, for example, threaten you with court for not adhering to the order, so what. He won't get a hearing until God knows when and no judge in the land would damn you for practising responsible distancing.

Of course, he can call, write, text, Skype etc.

I say all this as a stepmum whose partner's ex spent over a decade messing about with contact, using the children as weapons, obstructing CAFCASS as was etc. My partner was almost driven to a breakdown by the situation and being kept from his kids..... but that's a sacrifice he'd have made without objection to keep them as safe as possible, and to stop the spread of this virus. No question.

FenellaVelour · 23/03/2020 13:46

You’ve absolutely got to be sensible in these unprecedented times. The safety of your whole family takes precedence.

This is a useful article which is being endorsed by the judiciary in family courts: www.pinktape.co.uk/rants/corona-virus-and-separated-parents-what-to-do/

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