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Original poster

Supermarket special hour for the elderly WHO SHOULD BE AT HOME

28 replies

Haffdonga · 22/03/2020 17:09

Apologies if this has been discussed but I feel like I'm missing something here.

The supermarkets have very decently offered to hold a shopping hour in the morning for the elderly and vulnerable. How kind. Except those very people they are inviting into the store should be self isolating which means not going shopping.

I know there are some in this group who can't or won't be self-isolating and some who urgently need to go shopping but some elderly people are taking this as a green light that it's ok to go shopping in those hours.

My parents (80s and very vulnerable health-wise) are doing their very best to follow the self-isolation guidelines, They can online shop and I live just round the corner and I pick up anything they need. They've just excitedly told me that they will be going to Sainsbury's 3 times this week because there are special sessions just for their age group. When I explained they shouldn't really be going out at all they asked then who should be going to the special sessions. This I can't really answer.

Surely by offering these sessions supermarkets are sending an incredibly confusing message to the people who should be self isolating. Confused

OP posts:
HeIenaDove · 22/03/2020 17:17

Bully for you OP What about those who havent got anyone

there are a few like the OP on here They CLAIM to care about pensioners but its really an excuse to be nasty.

When i pointed out that 23% of pensioners live in social housing and a good proportion of them have key meters, ( then started a thread about key meters and the logistics of self isolation and possible lockdown) it didnt move half as fast as the threads castigating pensioners for not staying indoors .

Told me all i needed to know like i didnt already

QuimJongUn · 22/03/2020 17:27

They can online shop

How? There are no slots available. At all.

And as HelenaDove points out, there's the issue of key meters. I'm not a pensioner though I am in a high risk group, but I have both gas and electricity on key meters. Which involves going to the shop weekly and paying with cash (so I have to find a cash point, too). No contactless card payments allowed. I have no friends or anyone to help if DD and DH become ill and can't go out. What am I - and pensioners in a similar position - meant to do? Have no power for weeks? No hot water it ability to cook anything?

Some people simply cannot stay in. It's not an option.

SeptemberWeddingIHope · 22/03/2020 17:37

Plenty of under 70s shouldn't be out either but they're still queuing up outside the supermarkets at 6am to add to their stash of stuff the elderly cannot get
as the guy from the W.H.O. said in his speech ' young people you are not invincible'

Bluntness100 · 22/03/2020 17:39

Op, how can you not know this? Plenty of people can’t get slots, and do need to go out to get supplies. Not everyone can get a slot or has family to help them.

How do both you and your parents not know this?

TheCanterburyWhales · 22/03/2020 17:41

I'd love to see the 80 year olds we've seen pics of this week being barged to the side by the knuckle-draggers with their trolleys log onto Ocado.

Are you for real OP? Or just another "old bat in the supermarket today" ageist apologist?

Either way you're deeply unpleasant. But don't worry eh. They'll all be dead soon then you can have Lidl to yourselves.

But seeing as your parents have you, why aren't you doing their shopping for them? Or ordering online for them?

Helena, thank you for everything you do for the truly vulnerable in today's society. Flowers

Original poster
Haffdonga · 22/03/2020 17:41

I said
I know there are some in this group who can't or won't be self-isolating and some who urgently need to go shopping

@Bluntness100 How can you not have read this in my OP?

OP posts:
BritWifeinUSA · 22/03/2020 17:42

Cut them some slack. There are no online delivery slots. Not all of them have family nearby. I’m 5000 miles from my mum. She lives alone. So her options are shopping during the “silver hours” or starving. I know which I’d choose in her shoes...

Original poster
Haffdonga · 22/03/2020 17:44

I know for some people it is vital.

I also said that for some people like my parents it is confusing.

I think it is essential that this is offered for those who need it but the way it has been publicised gives a mixed message to thise who don't need it.

OP posts:
nildesparandum · 22/03/2020 17:47

I am in this group. I am 75 and have COPD and have been in isolation since yesterday and will be for next 3 months
I am fortunate I have family available to do shopping for me.They are not finding it easy as the shops are being drained dry.
I had an e mail from one supermarket telling me about special shopping times for the elderly.I replied stating that as we are not supposed to going out how can that work?.I am awaiting a response.

Original poster
Haffdonga · 22/03/2020 17:48

Yes for those who need it I think it is a very good idea.

But it is not ageist or deeply nasty to point out that it has confused some elderly people. Sad

OP posts:
ShanghaiDiva · 22/03/2020 17:50

I don’t think it’s a confusing message: go at these times if you have no alternative. Not everyone has someone to help and there are no online delivery slots for several weeks.
I am staying with my mum (have been here since Feb after leaving China) and also shop for her next door neighbours - they phone the order to my mum and I leave it on the doorstep for them.

ShanghaiDiva · 22/03/2020 17:52

If I were not back in the uk my do would need to go out. Who else is going to help her? Her 88 year old neighbours.

Original poster
Haffdonga · 22/03/2020 17:55

@BritWifeinUSA - so I am advocating starving old people, am I?

Perhaps fairly clearly anyone reading this calmly can appreciate that I have not suggested for a second that old people should not be helped in every way we can.

Perhaps some people are letting the fear and stress this is causing all of us to lash out at random people on the internet.

OP posts:
lettersbyowl · 22/03/2020 17:59

Not everyone over 70 should be self isolating. They should be stringent with social distancing and where possible only going out for medicines and medical apts, essential food shopping and exercise if they can stay 2m away from people. The super at risk group who should be self isolating from this group will have food packages delivered by the council.

RhymingRabbit3 · 22/03/2020 18:04

Older people should be using those sessions but only if they dont have an alternative. Your parents definitely shouldnt be going to Sainburys 3 times. Not only will they be risking themselves and others, but they will be adding to the crowds of shoppers making it harder for those who genuinel have no other option.

HeIenaDove · 22/03/2020 18:05

OP the only one i see here lashing out is you in your OP

@QuimJongUn Thanks @TheCanterburyWhales Thanks

Original poster
Haffdonga · 22/03/2020 18:05

@TheCanterburyWhales

They'll all be dead soon then you can have Lidl to yourselves

How fucking dare you? Your post is deeply nasty and shows a very limited comprehension capacity.

Of course I AM doing my parents shopping for fuck sake. I SAID that in my OP. Can you not read? I have also set them up on online shopping and they are quite tech savvy enough to do that themselves if they don't want me to help. I have also been over every day and dropped prescriptions etc for an elderly neighbour who is self isolating.

However some have misunderstood the supermarket silver sessions to be an outing for people their age for something to do because they are bored and they want to go despite the fact that they have everything they need.

I am very sad that some people are using mumsnet as a forum to attack others instead of trying to communicate and share.

OP posts:
madcatladyforever · 22/03/2020 18:06

I work for the NHS and there are hundreds of elderly people who don't have anyone, those who do often live hundreds of miles away from family who often don't want to spend their weekends travelling down to do their shopping etc.
Its incredibly depressing how many of them there are.
People often retire to the seaside or holiday or beauty spots because they think they will have a great retirement there while their families have to live where the work is.
If there are two of them in the house they might as well go out shopping together as if one gets infected the other one probably will as well.
There is a plague of lonliness and older people often only have older friends who themselves should be self isolating.
I live 200 miles away from my bnearest family and all my friends are my age, I'm beginning to think about my retirement now and am very concerned about this situation.
There were a queue of them round the block at the pharmacy the other day, the pharmacy said they can't do any more home deliveries because there are too many and they are staff down.
Those elderly who are on the internet can't get home deliveries.
Most elderly are not on the internet so have to go out to do banking.
How do you expect them to live isolated?

PrincessConsueIaBananaHammock · 22/03/2020 18:06

Have you considered it's not confusing but rather that they think it might be nice to actually go out, or to pick some food themselves,or to be able to get a full shop without items missing or substitutes.

This type of service is vital for people that do need it. Probably safer too to just be in and out in one shop and get it done rather than going to several, all busy etc.

Bathroom12345 · 22/03/2020 18:06

My DS works in a sm. He worked the early shift today. There was a queue of older people when the shop opened along with some people shopping for the vulnerable. No ID - they trust people to live with their own conscience They had a good old natter in the aisles. I think like a PP mentioned. It is confusing to some. They think it’s something they need to take advantage of, don’t miss out etc, especially for them. It’s a horrible horrible reason why the shops have had to do this but it’s really not a social outing. Sadly a majority of these people just don’t get what they are being asked to do and why you need to go in quickly, get your shopping and then leave. A couple of people asked for the coffee shop to be open!

Please do your shopping as quickly as you can. It’s not a social occasion.

Darbs76 · 22/03/2020 18:07

Agreed. I accept some might have no-one, hopefully that will change as people put notes through doors (if people don’t have internet). I’ve had 2 notes today alone. I’ve seen people ask what time it starts as they are taking their 80yr old grandma. Why? He should be shopping for her. People aren’t getting it

EvilPea · 22/03/2020 18:09

Picture this op.
You have to get the bus to the shops.
How much are you coming back with and able to carry with your arthritic hands?

TheSparklyPussycat · 22/03/2020 18:18

People over 70 are Not being advised to self isolate (yet) but to be careful to follow social distancing. I suspect this may be to allow people to stock up in preparation for more stringent measures,.

Also what Evil says. Plus a lot of the elderly may well not be able to go that early in the morning.

Thunderpunt · 22/03/2020 18:24

OP I agree with you, my neighbours took great delight in telling me they were going for the silver shopping hour, even though I had told them the day before I would pick anything they needed up.
Both over 70 and she is recovering from skin cancer, he is pre-diabetic. The government advice is that over 70's are strongly advised to stay at home, so unless they really have to do shopping and have no other support, they shouldn't take it as a green light to mooch off to the shops...