To ask how do you convince the over seventies to self isolate?

[Rainbowb]

Both my mum and my mother in law are declaring that everybody is hysterical, world has gone mad etc. and are going about everywhere, almost as normal. Both my brother and dh are getting so upset and I am worried too but I don’t know how you can force people to stay at home? The older generation are so stubborn!

I think the only way if a full lockdown by Boris!

You can't force them. All you can do is try to present them with the evidence (Italy etc) and then they'll make their own choices. It's very difficult - I understand how stubborn they can be.

This is a question for the corona virus topic.

I think public service announcements by the Queen, Alan Titchmarsh and David Attenborough might work.

I popped out to get essentials yesterday and couldn’t believe how many over 70’s were out and about.

One lady looked to be about 90, being held up by a walking stick and presumably her daughter who looked 70 plus. If she wasn’t vulnerable, then I’m not sure who is.

My father in law is 77 and still working his part time job.

Some older people don't need convincing. My elderly parents have been self isolating for over a week now. Ultimately, it's an individual choice, I suppose.

All you can do is present them with the evidence and point out that it's not just about protecting themselves but also about protecting others and reducing the pressure on the NHS. But until the army is called in to enforce a lockdown, there will be people who refuse to take any notice of the government advice.

I think we've finally got through to FiL by pointing out he might be happy to take his chances but MiL is vulnerable and wants to see her grandkids grow up as much as she can.

My Mum is a lost cause.

I’ve just talked to my FIL... he has correctly pointed out that the gov.uk website says over 70s only have to social distance so that’s all he’ll do. They’re taking precautions and letting us take them shopping, but until the website updates and says they should isolate, he won’t.

Grab stats from a reputable source showing:

• how much the critical illness level goes up by age group
• how long you need to be on a ventilator to survive
• how many ventilators we have

and

• what the Italian infection rate, right now.

After she has done that maths, then show her the new NICE assessment protocols for who gets a ventilator. It's truly brutal. Does she want to be on the recieving end of that decision?

I got through to my DM by telling her about an Italian doctor who was being interviewed in hospital whilst on duty. He explained that it wasn't like flu, it is more like chronic pneumonia. I think the idea that it’s a flu has made some people feel it’s all nothing to worry about. If that fails what does she think of the death rates in Italy?

In our family it worked by pointing out it’s not just risking them but risking us too and the info about it being more like sars than flu but they also now see the government doing things they have never done before which shows the seriousness. Sadly my elderly neighbour can’t cope being at home, for some reason instead of staying with one of her many friends who also are alone she is out constantly, walking around the shops, chatting to everyone. She’s over 80 with health problems and is probably going to end up a super spreader. I don’t know why she doesn’t think she’s at risk

This will be blunt but my close friend is a GP working on the frontline and is also a clinical director for the area.

Regarding the over 70’s she said the reason the govt said the over 70’s need to socially isolate is because they won’t get an ITU bed if they need it.
They will die in high numbers without this option.
Obviously they can’t say that on TV.

I had a row with my elderly Aunt this morning, she lives in sheltered housing where meals are provided but she doesn't want the meals as "other people have handled them" and has asked us to shop for her. We have told her that she has to have the meals - they are not having to go to the on site restaurant for them now, they book them and the staff bring them to their apartment at a pre-arranged time.

She's accused us of being selfish and not caring about her, I feel the same way about her and my children.

My mum thinks it's more important to drink wine with my sister every evening rather than not be dead! I've told her don't expect to see me; we can talk on phone, FaceTime etc. I am not going to be the one who kills her.

I described it as highly infectious pneumonia to an elderly friend today and he said he now understood the risk

I think most do understand but asking sometimes very lonely people not too see their family and friends for God knows how long is a bit ask ,my parents are both 78 i don't know when I will be seeing them now ,but then my mum told me her friend who.lost her husband to cancer on Xmas eve is coming to visit tomorrow as she's very lonely and has no.One else ,I'm not very happy about but they both have capacity to make their own decisions ,it's very difficult .

I would show them the article in the independent that says staff are preparing to decide who gets a ventilator and who doesn’t.

They will not be priority if younger fitter individuals come in and need them. It said people will be removed from ventilators if the shortage is that bad.

If they’re cool with that fine, but they are still selfish because their actions can still put others at risk, who don’t want to catch it and die

Well, it doesn't help that Gov.uk seem to have changed their advice to:

We are advising those who are at increased risk of severe illness from coronavirus (COVID-19) to be particularly stringent in following social distancing measures.
This group includes those who are:

aged 70 or older (regardless of medical conditions)
under 70 with an underlying health condition listed below (ie anyone instructed to get a flu jab as an adult each year on medical grounds):

the 12 weeks full isolation now seems to apply the the very ill, being written to next week.

I feel like I'm flogging a dead horse with my parents tbh

And the fact that they are only almost 70 seems that they're exempt

My parents, both mid-80s and in good health, seem to have got it. They are staying at home most of the time. If they feel like a change of scene they go out for a short drive, taking their own tea in a flask instead of visiting a cafe as they normally would. They've at least 10 days' worth of food in the house
and DF will pop out to the shop once a week for essentials. I'm in another country so can't do much to help, but I'm confident they understand the situation enough to keep safe.

I asked my 81 year old neighbour (saw him over the fence returning from the shops) if he knew that over 70s are advised to stay home. He just laughed and said „what about the over 80s?“. He has no intention of staying home even though his wife is extra vulnerable. I hope his daughter will talk some sense into him.

You can't. If the Italian death toll hasn't made a difference then nothing will.
Tell them I think they're
extremely selfish to their friends, family, medical staff, undertakers every who will have to deal with their stupidity. Will they move these 70 y.o from ICU beds for a young adult, Nope.
It's a case of who lays there first I'm sure.

My nana is the same. I find it infuriating. She is 83 and still socialising/ going to the shop every day and trying to insist DM continues to visit to help her a few times a week as usual. She thinks people are being overly hysterical.

I work in a bank and I cannot get through to many customers, there is a real air of snidiness in their attitude as well. On Friday I was told it's all scare mongering, the whole thing is fake and that I shouldn't be preaching. I was simply asking them if they'd like to learn about other ways they can do their banking over the coming weeks and months as they may not be able to get out or we may not be open. My child is going to have to attend school so that I can come to work for these people who are choosing to ignore what is going on around them, so not only am I risking my own health but that of my child and I'm getting more and more pissed off about the fact that so many are not taking this seriously.

On another note I won't tar all over 70's with the same brush as we have been much quieter this week due to lots of our customers taking the advice given. I hope it gets quieter and quieter as more people realise what they need to do to stop the spread.

My parents in law are giving my husband a full on guilt trip for not caring enough to come and visit them. No amount of explaining that it's quite the opposite seems to sink in.