Predictions of how long this BS will last?

[BlueMoon1103]

I really need some lights the end of the tunnel. I know no one knows for sure but how long do people predict this social distancing bullshit is going to go on for? My depression has already crept back in and I’m worried about how bad it’ll get if this goes on with no end in sight.

Please only nice posters, no snarky, snipey comments or people being mean.

It may be helpful to reframe your perspective.

Or it may be helpful for people to feel how they feel, and express that honestly. You can recognise that social distancing is important and still think it’s miserable bullshit. You can worry about the effect on your mental health even while protecting your and other’s physical health.

What you’re advocating instead is toxic positivity - www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.refinery29.com/amp/en-gb/what-is-toxic-positivity

It’s not helpful.

Than you to the above poster, you’ve given it a name! Love you username too

Very good link, @FuckOffCorona. Thanks.

I hate the word resilience full stop. According to most mental health professionals I've encountered, I'm very resilient due to trauma. As far as I can tell, it's a word they throw out when for whatever reason you've managed to stay alive following shit things happening to you. In my case that's as much to do with me being rubbish at killing myself, than any "resilience".

Yes, me too.

Or it may be helpful for people to feel how they feel, and express that honestly.

Oh, the relief of seeing others challenge imposed false "positivity". It is toxic.

I want to say I’m so pleased with how this thread is going right now, looked like the mean posters were going to take over for a while but sensible and kind posters are back!

I'm guessing it will last until all the snowflakes realise this affects EVERYONE and isn't just about them.

When will that be? Who knows.

SFS

Thanks to above posters especially @AgentCooper for voicing how I feel too. I have a 17 month old; just about survived 13 months of maternity leave and going back to work saved my sanity. I can’t cope with looking down the barrel of x months potentially cooped in the house (no garden) and DH is a GP so can’t help me out with childcare as he is still going to work (which I envy him!). I now have 4 days a week of a professional job to fit into one day plus evenings/ weekends, and DD generally still wakes twice a night for a feed.

I am DONE (but not actually done) with breastfeeding, we are trying to move house, my mum has just been diagnose with a horrible degenerative dementia-like disease and all of this coronavirus stuff is just extra SHIT on top of all that, as well as potentially stopping the house purchase and also taking away all the adult/ free time I had.

@CaptainWentworth God love you. I would gladly offer you my garden for part of the day (with me and DS inside obvs) if you lived in the southside of Glasgow.

I hear you about the breastfeeding. I’m still feeding DS too and every time I sit down he wants fed. And if I need to check emails on my phone he’s grabbing at it. So I have no idea how I’m going to work. DH is also wfh on the desktop computer and we’ve agreed that his work trumps mine because he earns so much more than me. He’s not being a bastard, it’s just fact. So I’m going to have to limit my working time to after I put DS to bed at night, after a full day running after him on my own. It fucking sucks.

And one thing I would say to all of us on here - though it feels horrible right now, it’s temporary. It’s not forever and we’ll get through it. Obviously it’s going to be fucking shite sometimes but let’s just be honest about how we feel and ignore any judgement coming our way. I’m here to be a listening ear to everyone feeling this way

I’d try not to look too far ahead, take it one day at a time. Life is incredibly hard with a young child as it is without this on top. Try to do one thing everyday that you enjoy; listen to your favourite song, watch a favourite tv show, have a relaxing bath, watch a clip of your favourite comedian on YouTube, get yourself knitting or colouring. Small things that you can look forward to.

I know no one knows for sure but how long do people predict this social distancing bullshit is going to go on for?
No-one knows for sure? Actually, no-one has a clue at all. All countries are just having to run with this because it's a new virus. MNers guessing is not going to help. Oh and please don't call it bullshit. This is really serious stuff, stuff none of us have ever gone through before. We are all having to adjust to new ways of living.

Tableclothing was being realistic, they haven't been unpleasant or mean. You do need to re-frame your perspective. Often depression is as a result of having a negative mindset and you need to find a way of not letting yourself get bogged down in negativity. They did ask about what you normally helps you cope with depression.

So, you don't like to take one day at a time (which is often the advice given to people suffering depression or bereavement because thinking much longer term makes the problem seem much more insurmountable). I think that is where you need to focus - you need to stop thinking too far ahead and only think one day or even one hour ahead.

If that really is the only way you can cope then you are going to have to consider it is going to last for a long time, like 6 months. So, what things can you put in place to help you deal with social distancing for 6 months?

If you are only socially distancing can you not do what others did yesterday for Mothers' Day - communicate by standing in a garden and talking to someone through it who is either over 2 metres away or shout through a closed window?

Most of us will video call our friends and relatives if we can't physically visit them. If that is the only way to communicate with them does it matter if it upsets you at first? You will soon get used to it the more regularly you do it.

Keeping busy will help - and you say you don't have time for anything other than working and entertaining your baby so that will help the time pass more quickly.

Read a book, play your favourite music, do a jigsaw puzzle or a crossword puzzle, enjoy a long hot bath, spring clean your home. Do you have a garden you could spend time in?

It is hard. It is hard for everyone, irrespective of suffering depression. Are you on medication for depression or have you had therapy? Do you have a support worker or other medical professional on the end of a phone who knows you well and can come up with some options?

depression is the result of a negative mindset

That kind of attitude is really damaging to people with mental health issues as it effectively blames us for how we feel. I don’t want to have depression. I do. Not my choice.

Those things pass the time but very slowly and painfully. Your post comes across as very unsympathetic. I have already explained that the ‘one day at a time’ shite makes me more anxious as I need plans in order to have any sense of security. Very common in those with depression and anxiety, again. Also something therapists/people giving advice should think about as for a lot of people is causes more anxiety not less and insisting that’s the only way to help is not just unhelpful but upsetting.

I think that is where you need to focus - you need to stop thinking too far ahead and only think one day or even one hour ahead.

And how do you suggest we do that? I have pstd, the reason for the diagnosis means that being trapped in my house is up there with my worst nightmares. I've had a ton of NHS therapy and my symptoms were roughly under control. I'm unravelling fast. Dh is working from home and is increasingly bad tempered. I'm not sleeping, have a horrendous cough and am trying to distract a 5 year old and 22 month old who are used to being out of the house most of the time. They don't want to do the same thing but can't stand the other one having my attention. On top of that, my Grandmother has just died and I couldn't go to her funeral but am being guilt tripped about that by various family members. Trying to think an hour ahead when my head is full of the fact that could be our future for months is impossible.

I'm terrified we'll be locked down because the behaviours of stupid selfish people and that I won't be able to go for a run once my chest recovers (the only form of self harm my psychiatrist supports). I'm terrified that I'll become just like my own emotionally abusive parents when I have no way of getting a break from the kids. I've had to work very hard at breaking that mould but whenever I'm under a lot of stress, I can feel myself slipping back into the same parenting methods I was raised with. I'm terrified that I'll lose my grasp on reality like I did when ds was born and like I did in the aftermath of the trauma which caused all of this. I'm scared that I'll end up hurting the people I "love" either directly or indirectly by killing myself.

Reading a book doesn't really cut it right now.