How do I protect DH and help DD with disabled child?

[goldengranny]

Rock and a hard place!

My granddaughter is severely disabled and is medically vulnerable. I normally help my DD care for her and school runs etc. Also have a 7 yo GD (asthmatic)

DD and her DH both work in frontline health services. Kids (although eligible) are not going to school because of health issues.

DD simply cannot physically manage DGD, no help from carers etc, so it's only me. I am a fit 62 yo, but DH is 70 and has a serious heart condition.

I have to help DD with the kids. She has anxiety and won't cope alone. There is nowhere for me to live there as older DGD needs her own room with lots of equipment. I would also be rapidly exhausted as I won't get any sleep.

My plan is to spend most of the day at DDs house helping until her DH gets home. At my house keep to 2 rooms, have the house super clean and clutter free, Dettol all surfaces regularly, wear a mask and disposable gloves or wash hands regularly. We have to share a bathroom and kitchen but will use it separately and clean any surfaces I touch with bleach. Kettle etc in 'my' room.

DH is still going out to the supermarket and seeing friends, although I think he is social distances, but he's not washing his hands more than usual, so he's not self isolating.

If DD or her DH get sick I will stay at their house as I'll probably be infected anyway.

Is this do able?

I think, that as your DH is not protecting himself, that you are doing your best and being as safe as possible and I would personally carry on as you are. HOWEVER, I would review it. The moment DH starts taking proper precautions, you need to either stop going, or move in to your DD's and sleep in the living room.

Think I agree @Herja If DH is prepared to take risks, although minimising them, me being in the same house but distancing myself at all times (Intend to speak on mobiles!) isn't too unreasonable. Short of never shopping and barricading the house, we are never going to be totally safe.