Elderly relative refusing to NOT visit elderly and vulnerable person

[TheOrigBrave]

Person 1: over 80. Reasonable health.

Person 2: nearly 80. Parkinson's - confused, wobbly, weak. Has carers 3x a day.

Person 1 doesn't accept it's not ok to visit person 2 - that it's their choice and is insulted at being told they should stay in. Won't listen to me. Carers aren't in position to advise. It's like she's triumphant in her defiance.

WWYD?

Let them be. Sadly there is nothing you can do. Some people are not going to accept the situation and you are not the police. It’s also not illegal to visit. You will just have to keep explaining the situation and hope they see sense but you cannot imprison them.

Thank you. You're right, I need to step back and let them get on with it.

Person 1 has emailed me saying they're happy to mind DS2 now the schools are shut. I don't want them to. I don't want to me the one who possibly infects them.

Well if you have other arrangements in place, politely refuse. It’s difficult for everyone at the moment. We are all having to make choices we don’t like making.

Unless person 2 needs protecting because they are now mentally incapable (guess that one is on the power of attorney?) then it's up to them. The carers are the biggest risk.
What's their life expectancy anyway? Depending on region and background they might already be beyond average life expectancy. Plus the Parkinsons. Why would they want to spend their last six months under house arrest?

I would let them be too and be supportive of what they decide. Personally I would prefer person a to keep checking in on person b. I would find the thought of person b being lonely or scared during this last part of their life heart breaking. Given person b is surrounded by carers she/he is at risk already anyway.