Lockdown - what the hell are we meant to do?

[WhatTheHellHappenedArgh]

I know it's the right thing and there's no other alternative but I'm just panicking right now. I live with DP and our 4 year old in a flat in a city, we don't have a garden. DP and I both work and can continue to work from home easily but it will be such a struggle with a young child and no outside space. Will we literally not be allowed to go outside at all except for food? I am honestly freaking out right now.

I’ve got friends in the US. They’re in lockdown but are allowed outside for exercise and walking adhering to distancing rules.
I hope we’ll be allowed to as well.

You will do as the govt directs you as and when it happens.
You won't get a choice.
In Italy there are police checks, roadblocks and zero tolerance.
As it should be.
They tried to give people a modicum of personal freedom trusting naively that individuals would do the best for society.
Unfortunately when it comes down to it, individuals think only of themselves.
Look at the threads on MN...my toddler has to go out (yeah Chinese and Italian parents said that too) etc etc.
Wait and see what the govt tells you you're going to do.

@WhatTheHellHappenedArgh
You're allowed to feel freaked out! It's a crazy situation. Cut yourself some slack and ignore negative comments.
My friend is in lock-down currently in France with police patrolling, and is very much allowed out for fresh air as long as he stays close to home and stays away from others.
There are some tips online for coping with this with small children, such as online work-outs aimed at kids, managing routines etc.
I think you'll feel better once you've processed things a bit xx

We are in lockdown in Austria but you are allowed out to walk if you are no more than 5 people and all the people live in your house.

It has been hard. I have 3 DCS: 9, 6 and 2 and DH and I are both WFH at the moment too. It is hard to ensure people have quiet space for work and school stuff whilst keeping the toddler happy.

I have noticed though that they have actually calmed down over the last few days and got used to being with each other all the time. If arguments were at the normal levels I would have lost the will by now but they seem to have got into a bit of a rhythm.

I use WhatsApp to call grannies and aunties and uncles a lot and let the kids talk to them. DM listens to the 6 year old read each evening and is going to start reading to the 9 year old tonight hopefully.

It is not easy but it is doable

IF we go on lockdown, then you'll just have to deal with it. Yes being stuck in a flat with two young kids is kind of a nightmare, but plenty of people around the world go through much worse on a daily basis. This is just for a few weeks/months. Try to get some perspective - it's a shitty situation but nothing to "freak out" or panic over.

It’s going to be hard for lots of people. But in reality we are in a much better position to have this happen at this time in history believe it or not.

We have internet. We can skype or FaceTime or phone friends and relatives. We have access to so many online resources to educate and keep dcs occupied.

Imagine this had happened before the internet? Or before phones. Or before children’s tv?

So yes it’s going to be hard. It’s shit for us all.

But it’s not as bad as it might have been.

Routine will be important. I saw some thing with a rough daily timetable of how to get through the day. I’m sure there is lots available on line.

I hope if there is a lockdown you are still able to go to work? I can’t work from home and I won’t get paid if I cant get to work?

I do understand that the prospect of being stuck inside is unpleasant but I suppose at least we’re not going to have to do it with bombs raining down like they do/did in Aleppo🤷🏼‍♀️? Op, you will find ways to cope and your dd will adjust...stay calm, stay in charge - she will take her cues from you.

Hey OP, I also live in a flat in the city with my DH and a toddler and the thought of getting stuck indoors with them for weeks is panic inducing haha

We've been going out for a daily walk in the park and I've been letting her run around outside as much as poss. Getting out is a big help we are just avoiding contact with people.

We are making the effort to tidy up our balcony now so we can at least step out for a bit of fresh air if we do get stuck indoors.

Hoping it won't come to a full lock down but if it does we'll all be in it together and will get through it!

Maybe start planning now on strategies to help, like can you alternate your works hours - or do you need to be online at a particular time. Because if you can alternate then build a schedule with your DH of who works when and when one is working the other is looking after DC.
Be specific about what aspects in particular are stressing you. For me it's the unknown, and the inability to plan, but if for you its access to outside or exercise try think now in a worst case scenario - what would you do.

I’ll be shocked if we aren’t in lock down by the weekend.

Hope you're all well, I need some advice.
My mother has been told to self isolate with my brother (13) and sisters (both 10) from yesterday, they all have new coughs but she's adamant it's fine it's just a head cold. I haven't seen her for nearly 3 weeks and she's adamant to come up some time next week, I told her absolutely is she not coming in this house as she's supposed to be isolating and she thinks she's still going to take my siblings shopping and for a walk etc in the coming days. Regardless whether it is coronavirus or not, she should be staying home and not leaving that house, the fact she/they are displaying one of the symptoms angers me with 2 of my siblings suffering from asthma, that she would be willing to come up and potentially spread it to me and her grandchildren or take her kids out to spread or catch if they haven't already. I've just had a falling out with her over it because I'm so appalled and actually quite hurt. I feel like there's absolutely jack shit I can do for her to listen. As I posted 2 nights ago, someone in my grandfather's care home tested positive so with him, with us being unsure if he will catch it now, I would of thought she'd be a bit more serious about this.
What can I do?

Hello! We are in the US and have been at home with a 4.5 year old since last week. We are in a similar situation to you OP. So far, it hasn't been half as bad as we expected. Things that have helped:

• having a set schedule each day that is close to his preschool schedule and keeps consistency. This avoids some arguments.
• clearly dividing up the childcare/work from home duties between both parents (alternating morning and afternoon between us).
• for exercise, doing kids yoga together (Cosmic Kids on youtube is fabulous. There's also a really nice CBBC story time yoga program on the iplayer too) and 'dance parties'.
• lots of crafts and just free-play time. Lego, coloring, playdoh, getting all the teddies out for a tea party.
• baking together.
• we do go out for a walk once a day, to get fresh air. It's been quite friendly where we live actually. People keep a distance from each other as they pass, but tend to smile and greet each other (although this may be because we are in the US, where strangers tend to be friendlier!!)

We are lucky that there are two of us, and we can get our work done at home.

I think you also just have to acknowledge what your strengths and weaknesses are as a parent engaging with your own child. I am not a natural at open-ended pretend play with my kid... My DH is much better than I am at crawling around on the floor pretending to be a dinosaur, or noodling about with lego. When I'm with our kid, I'm more comfortable doing things we can do side-by-side, like baking or drawing together, or reading a book.

Point is: don't try and do an activity with them if you know you'll get frustrated with it. Go easy on yourself. It's ok to have lower standards in trying times.

You'll be able to continue going for walks etc I imagine even if there is a total lockdown, don't worry too much. They're not ignoring the importance of exercise so far so hopefully that won't change.

We have been in lockdown for weeks and that includes running or going for a walk. Most people in my area live in flats, a lot (me included) have young children. You just get on with it because you have to. Take heart from the fact that if you do go into lockdown (and I think that is likely because it seems that relying on common sense doesn't work) you definitely won't be the only ones!

These are the WHO guidelines for social distancing.

Also as a more optimistic note, (and I know I am very very lucky in my job/housing/family situation) our personal experience has been much nicer than I thought it would be. The only other time we are all together for this long is over the christmas holidays, which are usually when we are all sick and stressed out. We've never been able to take summer holidays before, because we can't afford it. So while we're still working, and everything around us in the world is strange and frightening... I'm finding that being forced to spend a lot of time with the two people I love most in the world is actually rather nice!

This is the largest change to the current way of life since the war. It is blip in comparison. I do feel very sorry for people with young children. It will be ok. You will cope.

If you have some spare cash, look now at getting crafting / cooking / drawing / painting etc things for activities. Cereal packets make great painting boards and the like. Think going a bit blue peter.

Im disabled and was mostly too ill to play with dd at this sort of age. We often used to do “PE” to amuse her. She would be given an activity to do. Eg run / hop / skip / one foot / go backwards / crawl etc between points in the room. That would wear her out. I’m presuming you don’t have those issues so you can play together. Here are some other ideas. whatmomslove.com/kids/active-indoor-games-activities-for-kids-to-burn-energy/. Loads of interesting stuff online.

You'll just get on with, like millions of other people are getting on with it right now.

Nobody is saying it will be fun or easy but it will be reality for a while. Luckily we have the internet and things like childrens' TV and music channels, as well as online educational resources. If you can, go out and buy board games, puzzles, activity books and colouring/art supplies to keep your child occupied.

It's just a small thing but there was a lovely artist on radio 5 this morning who is going to do draw along art classes for kids twice a week.

I forgot his name but he was on Twitter. I'm sure we will all manage.

People are very creative and things will evolve.

We all need to take active steps to protect our mental health and our kids mental health.

So exercise, watch funny stuff, so creative things, learn things together.

At the moment they're saying the elderly can go for a walk, so hopefully that'll be the same for the rest of us for a good while. If you can find a quiet space in a park, field away from others I don't see any reason why you can't play ball, a game.

If you have the money, perhaps, look at getting some new games you can all play together, extra art stuff, whatever he/she might enjoy.

Indoor timed obstacle courses might help burn off some energy. Race to and fro wall to wall across room in different ways, e.g. egg and spoon race, bum shuffle, commando-style under blanket, under one chair and over the next, etc. Get kids to create routes for you, and you for kids. Might tire DC enough to give you some peace and quiet to do some work afterwards?

I'm on lock down in a small flat with DS 4. We are on day four. It is doable so far. Work is definitely tricky but we kind of do shifts or work when Ds is in bed. You make it work.

@Smilethoyourheartisbreaking tell your friend she can hand write it - I can let you have the wording if she doesn't have a computer. She'll need to take a passport with her and stay away from other people.

@daisypond do you have a link for the bbc stuff? I've googled and can't find it thanks x