PILs not listening

[goodthanks]

NC as outing. FIL is immunocompromised. He has developed a high temperature, NHS Direct said to self isolate. MIL is still going to work. Gently reminded him this means separate rooms, bathrooms, etc. Tonight DH called and he said they were eating dinner together and have been together all day, his argument is that MIL will have it by now anyway. I am really pissed off, DH thinks I'm being irrational. AIBU here? I'm really worried about FIL, he's vulnerable.

So why is mil going to work if she she probably has it.
You should put this to them.... The reaction from her work could be a real problem for her.
It's up to people how the handle it in their own home, but highly selfish to put it on others. You poor thing

Well exactly. She's being selfish. They both think me and my SILs are overreacting. DH agrees with them. I'm finding it stressful, I just want to keep them safe!

I sort of agree she’ll probably have it by now anyway so if my husband came home with it for example I don’t think I would isolate from him.

We would however both isolate until we are both clear.

I feel u. My mum dad and nan all live in the same house. All three are very very old and my nan is very sick. I keep being told it is all being over hyped and they will carry on as normal.
I have tried but it has fell on deaf ears.

The consequences of just one of them getting it is unthinkable as they will not survive due to extremely bad health

I have done my beat I can’t do anymore. So I feel your pain

That's fair enough, it would be weird being alone in a room while your DH is elsewhere in the house- but obviously they're sort of doing the worst of both!

@Drivemybluecar it's rotten isn't it. Both PILs seem to think we're really overreacting. Apparently an "expert" on Facebook told them so.

Nothing you can do. The oblivious is strong in those ones!

You have to let it go and use your energies to protect the one person whose behaviour you can control: yourself. Whatever befalls the family, nobody will be telling you you were right and they only wish they'd listened. I think the whole Brexit mess has encouraged everyone to stop listening to each other and never to believe anything anyone says. We've become ungovernable. At least the person currently in charge is one of the key Brexit players, so there's an element of Karma in his having to steer the ship through this storm.

Our house is too small to isolate in the way you suggest. Many people will be the same.

Elderly can be very stubborn. Don't like being told what to do! Different generation I guess.
I know for a fact my very independent 91 year old dad will take not a dicky bit of notice of what I or anyone else will advise him, and will be carrying on as usual.
I feel for you. Don't know what the answer is

My MIL is ignoring it all because she “would be miserable if she can’t go out!” Despite her having asthma and FIL being quite frail. She wouldn’t let us do her shopping or shop online-it all falls on deaf ears, I despair, I really do but she is a grown woman who will have to live with any consequences.

@Disfordarkchocolate that's a good point, plenty of people couldn't manage it logistically. They absolutely have the space for it though- could easily do separate bathrooms/bedrooms and even lounges.

My FIL is in his 70s with a few underlying conditions and is very vulnerable. MIL is still going out shopping and for coffee. When I said she’s putting him in danger she said “if it’s his time then it’s his time” I couldn’t believe it. My own mother is staying in to protect my dad who has had a lung removed.

They should both be staying at home and isolating together.

But yes this will be the same picture up and down the country. No one will listen to the rules.

@goodthanks it’s so frustrating. My mil on the other hand is being really sensible and is planning on buying loads of wool to make baby clothes while she is stuck indoors.

She may have it herself now. I can understand people wanting a normal life at home but going out to work as a possible carrier is pretty irresponsible. I am sure work will send her home if they knew the situation.

@magicstar1 It's tough isn't it. They won't accept that I'm acting out of concern for them. I'm not trying to spoilt their fun!

@HappyHammy They won't listen to that either

In a small house with one bathroom it’s impossible to self isolate.
She shouldn’t be going out though.

@NearlyGranny Missed your post. What brilliant advice. Thank you so much, just what I needed to hear.

Would you all be keeping DC away from them in the meantime??