Coronavirus causing strain at home

[PrettyTricky]

Anyone else arguing with their significant other over this? I'm not saying I'm right, in fact I think I'm being a bit over the top, but I am so worried and can't help myself.

I'm obsessed with the news, can't think or talk about much else, am doing as much as I possibly can to social distance, am really worried about elderly parents who live at the other end of the country, worried about dc, worried about food shortages and all sorts of apocalyptic possibilities.

DP on the other hand, is mildly concerned, but still going to work which is absolutely fair enough, he also went to a big football game last weekend, he went through airports etc. I think it was irresponsible and I don't want him bringing it home when I'm doing all I can to prevent it.

He's also getting fed up of me going and on about it, and apparently being a 'prophet of doom'. I can't stop reading the news on my phone, even in bed, which he's not happy with and generally I'm not in the mood for intimacy or even being close to anyone, in fact I would be quite willing to stay 3 metres away from everyone for the next few months. Hardly conducive to a happy relationship though!

I don't want to feel like this, but I can't seem to snap out of anxiety. Is anyone else having issues because of how they are reacting to this crisis?

Yes I am with you. Similar situation for us. We have a young baby and although I think the risk to her is low.. I still don’t want him getting it and if I catch it I might not be able to look after him. DH has a job where he can’t work from home so he is putting us at risk every day being out and about interacting with all sorts of people. He also has another child (5) from a previous relationship who stays with us at weekends. I asked him if we could postpone taking her for a while in case she’s a “carrier” and passes it onto us. This caused an almighty row and me being called OTT.
His father has underlying conditions and we have elderly relatives. I just want to avoid this thing, for as long as possible anyway (so at least my baby is a bit older).
It may be that it passes us by with no problems but it’s difficult not to think worst case scenario when you see what’s going on in the world. Some people just don’t take it seriously though. It’s a really difficult situation if you’re not on the same page.
Sorry I know that’s not very helpful but just to assure you I do think many other couples will be having similar rows.

Risk to him is low*

Wow CDM I am not surprised your suggestion caused an almighty row, that's really awful.

What TARS said

My DH is massively panicking and has high anxiety about this. It is hard to know how much to indulge him.

I was in this situation until DH realised his Dad has MS and would be most at risk, as with my mum and sister, so he could understand my worries. Today he messaged me from work saying he was really scared and asked if we should buy extra food incase his Dad got sick - two days ago he called me silly for being worried

@Cdm2020 I completely understand your worries, and I know you're not trying to be mean to your dsd by suggesting to postpone, it's just that the protective instinct kicks in and your want to keep your house a safe space. Nothing is rational when anxiety is raised this far.

It’s the other way round here.

Dh is stressing as immunosuppressed.

I can’t believe you actually said that about your stepchild CDM I’m not surprised it caused a row. It would actually cause me to reevaluate my marriage if dh said that about my nephews/nieces!

Similar. My DD has asthma. My bf doesn’t live with us but he is so far being quite blasé and not making any changes to his social life or work patterns. I am thinking about asking him to choose between seeing us and living his ordinary life and waiting to choose my moment.

The advice given is to avoid family gatherings.. obviously to avoid people passing it back and forth - so that’s where I was coming from. I suggested postponing to protect her and extended family as well, as I say DH has been out at work and in contact with general public so could easily catch it.

With a young baby who has had breathing difficulties I’m very nervous, of course I’m not trying to be mean, just reduce the risk. Trying to stop the spread and protect everyone.

Imagine being stuck in the house together for 16weeks!

Yes although roles half reversed. I have hand sanitizer stocks at home so have been handing it out to him and making him wash hands as soon as he walks through the door etc. And then he has the nerve (having told me all the hand washing is OTT) to tell me I'm not worried enough. Which I'm not, in the sense that I'm doing what I can and otherwise just mentally singing Que sera sera, have to keep same! Maybe try not to read too much news, it's not really going to help.

Do you actually have any reason to be concerned? Are one of you asthmatic or something?

It's the other way round here too. We're both concerned, and while I don't actually thing DP is "wrong" in any of his views about coronavirus (he's immunosuppressed, I'm pregnant, so we really need to be careful) but he won't bloody stop going on about it and it's making me stressed!

We're both at home until the middle of next week anyway, so it's not like we can change any behaviours to keep us safer. I just want to forget it until we actually need to do something. Arg!

I'm genuinely alarmed by your anxiety. I say this genuinely, you need support with your mental health. It really shouldn't be controlling your life to this level.

We have been watching the news as usual, washing hands a bit ore but otherwise life is going on totally as normal.

DP is saying we should cancel our visit to my DF this weekend, who we haven't seen for a couple of months. We have a 2 yo DC, but we are all well at the moment. My DF is mid sixties with no underlying health problems and really wants to see us. I think DP is just looking for an excuse to get out of going .