How To Respond?

[Oodiks]

So, I met a really nice woman last week who helped me move house. She was terrific, drove a red pick-up truck and was brilliant helping me lug a load of stuff from my old house to my new house. We got along really well and shared lots of stories about ourselves while we worked. I suggested we meet for a coffee/tea as she works near me.

What's this got to do with the conflict in the ME I hear you ask...

She emailed me to suggest that we could meet for tea/coffee, or I could come to her house for a friendly social gathering of her 'Justice for Palestine' group and I don't know how to reply. It wasn't a topic we had discussed, but I am strongly pro-Israel (not Netanyahu in case you were wondering) and would find a 'Justice for Palestine' group quite challenging.

WWYD?

Oh I am judgemental - I make no bones about it.

"Thanks but I don't think that’s a good idea as unfortunately that seems to be a topic on which we are unlikely to agree. But I’d still love to meet up for coffee. How about (date/time/place)?"

Yes, I can tell.

Well a quick look at most social media platforms would suggest the opposite

Absolutely

But anyway....I'm sure world leaders are waiting with baited breath for this coffee morning to take place

In your experience, depending on who you follow/search for. I have seen the extreme and middle ground for both.

If you base your world view on social media posts "most" people are homophobic, racist, antisemitic, misogynistic, islamophobic, xenophobic and so on

Disagree.

i think this is two sides. Many pro Israel are quick to paint as well the other side as evil and Pro Palestinians have been called antisemitic and terrorist supporters as well

So do I. You can decide who to follow on social media and avoid people who are prejudiced. The op is trying to anticipate and avoid conflict in reality.

100%.

I choose to follow people who are pro women, pro children, etc. I follow thoroughly decent people and accounts.

‘I’d really like to meet up for a coffee. Unfortunately, the group doesn’t sound like something I’d be interested in but thank you for inviting me’ (don’t mention being a Zionist or she may block you immediately!)

Oh you don't have to look specifically for it. Even a post I saw on fb about bagels and Jewish food was filled with pro Palestinian irrelevant comments and anti semetic filth.

Yes, you can't avoid this sort of thing as antisemitic people pile onto even the most innocuous post about anything to do with Jewish life. Clearly holding Jewish people here collectively responsible for things they don't agree with relating to Israel.

That's not ok, neither is pro-zionists online, who consider themselves to be moderate post videos about how Israel should do whatever it takes, even if it means levelling the whole of Gaza/withholding aid etc. This level of hateful discourse from supposed 'moderate' voices is rather disturbing.

If you don't want to go, just say no thank you. If the existence of the group and her involvement means you don't want to be friends with her, you don't have to be, but if you'd be happy to have a friendship with her then you can just say that's not for you and spend time together in different contexts.

What a shame to find this out when you felt you had a connection and the start of a friendship

I would just say that it's not something you'd be interested in. Then I'd cut my losses

I can't think of anything worse to be honest, although she'll maybe move onto the next "thing" soon. I suppose it depends how much you valued the potential connections

Well yes and equally we don't know whether this lady would be happy to be friends or friendly with the op once she knows the ops opinion.... sometimes people are happy to agree to disagree and just not discuss...for others, it's a deal breaker...who knows

Rubbish.

That's no more true than saying most Zionists want the obliteration of Gaza and the remaining Palestinians in the West Bank.

although she'll maybe move onto the next "thing" soon

🙄

I think people forget that for some of us, what is happening isn't a 'trend', or a bandwagon or just something in the news. The people injured, scarred, tortured, killed, left starving, displaced and disappeared are our loved ones and their neighbours. We don't get to 'move on' to a new bandwagon and leave this behind without a second thought, because this is being done to us and our loved ones. We will live with this trauma and grief for the rest of our lives.

Agree it is such a dismissive crude statement

Agree with you. For some others we don’t have loved ones in Palestine but we’ve supported and idea of a free Palestine where there are no restrictions and they can have a proper government, the idea of a 2 state solution that many speak about … it’s not something trendy. I can’t see how people supporting/ requesting a 2 state solution can’t see that this means a free Palestine and a free Israel. This is not trend. It’s the lives of millions of peoples.