Feel like an expert so why has it not happened

[absentbump]

Does anybody else feel as though they are an expert on CM, temperature charting, BD'ing symtpom spotting and just about everything to do with trying to concieve...we've been TTC our first for the last 10 months and I feel like i'm obsessed with just about everything to do with trying to concieve and just wondered if anybody had any tips on how to be more chilled and not think about it so much and let it happen...so many people just say try and relax and it will happen but how can you when you are waiting for it to happen and are doing everything every book says to make it happen....sorry just having a moan

If you have sex on the right day at the right time, are super healthy, fit etc, your chances of conception are still only around 25%. It's normal for it to take over a year and in a lot of other countries they consider 2 years the norm before investigating reasons for not conceiving. It is frustrating though. I do know as I was there once myself. Took 14 months and a miscarriage after 12 months of trying to get pg with dd. No fertility issues at all.

I found that the only way to relax about it was to actively throw myself into something else. I took up slr photography, did a course, got out walking and taking pics, developed my own prints etc. I became so fascinated by it that I almost forgot to be interested in ewcm. And I got pregnant of course. Was able to take some lovely pics of dd too once she arrived.

hmmm, i am with you on this.
6 people have anounced pregnancy at work in the last 3 weeks.
Ive been trying for 3 years and had 5 mcs.

gutted.

sigh.

Ive started back on the ov sticks this month. Gave ourselves 3 months off trying. Feel much better and refreshed ready to start again.

I just think, it will happen for us eventualy.

Actually show of hands, your stats and facts make me feel a whole lot better about the whole thing, ia m not impatient, i am willing to wait for it, and knowing that in the normal course of events, it takes time is reasuring.

Ah thanks girls I feel silly moaning when I have only tried for 10 months and I know for a lot of people it takes so much longer so sorry for being impatient.... just having one of those days

thanks so much for some good advise, I think I do need a project we are going to moving soon will concentrate on the new house and forget about monitoring everything.

I'm so sorry to hear tightwad that its taking time for you to concieve and about your mcs, you are right it will happen eventually just takes some people longer then others and i wish you all the good luck that it happens for you soon...keep positive and thanks again for your comments

I would now pay a visit to the GP and tell him you have been ttc for a year. It could take some considerable time to get a referral so you may as well start the process now.

Simple investigative tests can be done on both of you by the GP.

If it helps, I have been trying for 22mths

We've been not trying to not getting pregnant for about 3 years (if that makes sense?). vaguely 'trying' for about a year and i've been all over it for about the last 3 months. I am REALLY trying not to get too obsessed with it but it IS very hard. Had some mid cycle bleeding which turned out to be 'just one of those things' but had to do tests to make didnt have an eptopic. This has got the ball rolling with looking at my fertility so obviously its been a lot on my mind!! So far everything is looking normal my end just need to get the OH swimmers checked out. But I am 38 so i realise it will prob take me longer to conceive and there is always the nagging thought it wont happen naturally. Don't beat yourself up about obsessing its very hard not too when you want something that is essentially not within your control! At least if you recognise you are doing it you can distract yourself!

This month was a few days late so got my hopes up but I think its just fall out from last months weird one. ah well!

Hi All - I just wanted to re-iterate what Attila said - it can take a while to get referrals so would approach the GP just to get some basic tests in the meantime - almost having those blood tests and any sperm tests would at least help you relax if things are all OK with you both. And if they are not then at least the ball has started rolling as it can take a while with the NHS. I am in the same position - been around 8 months and the GP is just doing same basic tests for both DH and I. As long as they come back OK - at least some of the pressure will be off in terms of the worry about 'is anything wrong with us'?