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Can I join the rollercoaster?

6 replies

FancyALittle · 13/04/2010 19:15

Hello everyone,

First of all I hope you can excuse me for starting a new thread. I?ve come over to mumsnet a few times each week for the past month or so, looked at this forum, been bewildered and wimped out of posting.

Next weekend I get married, to my wonderful H2B. Having children has always been a high priority for us, but we had always intended to wait for another 5 or so years before trying to start a family as we?re still fairly young. We never thought we'd be the couple who tried soon after they got married!

Well, things change.

Three months ago H2B had an urgent ultrasound and was diagnosed with testicular cancer, he also had a chest X-ray and liver scan which showed the cancer had not spread. However, we had to say goodbye to the misbehaving chappie. (It?s OK, he wasn?t my favourite one).

With each month that has passed, we have had more reassuring results. The signs are that surgery has been curative, and his chances of continuing to have no cancer are over 98%. He is on strict surveillance for the next two years.

We are fairly settled, and very much in love. When you are, your compulsion to want to have children is enormous. Add into the mix the sheer terror of the possibility of having children taken away from you and the decision becomes obvious. As it stands, H2B has a raised FSH level which could be because his body is adjusted to having one testicle, or his fertility could be impaired. We don?t, and won?t, know for a while. We have kindly been permitted to bank sperm (next week!). When he got the diagnosis, it was 3 days before the testicle was removed, and we?re frightened beyond belief about that happening again and having all chances of children being removed with it.

So, we?ve decided to start trying after the honeymoon. I?m having my implanon out on 11th May and let the baby-making commence!

I always imagined some serene moment, where my husband and I would look at each other and simultaneous suggest we start a family. We?re very excited, but when your life gets turned upside down it?s difficult to feel in control, and I think it?s fair to say we are a bit daunted by what?s in store. I hope I can share what I anticipate will be one big rollercoaster ride with you.

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skidoodly · 13/04/2010 19:21

Best of luck. I really hope it all works out for you two.

I had a honeymoon baby. She's 2 now and just marvellous.

misshoohaa · 13/04/2010 19:24

Hi Fancyalittle, you're story sounds like you've had a tough ride but fingers crossed to everything coming back all clear and both your future DP and Future Mr Fancyalittle lots of lovely little babies!

I think everyone thinks that one moment they will have a magical lets have a baby moment, but I think like you, so many people due to circumstance end up having kids at a less than perfect time. Everything is meant to be though and sure that when you get that BFP comes along it will be the best thing in the world despite your hand being forced a little.

Best of luck to you and welcome to MN, and more importantly the world of insane symptom spotting!!

FancyALittle · 13/04/2010 19:37

skidoodly That's lovely! Looks like we will just be practising on the honeymoon (just as well with the champagne flowing!), but I really hope it doesn't take too long after that.

misshoohaa Thank you so much. That's a really nice way of putting it, I'm going to text H2B! We've both been feeling weirdly guilty over the decision!?

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FancyALittle · 17/05/2010 20:07

Gosh! So I'm married, and the implanon is out. The folic acid is in. And I'm crapping myself.

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Ariesgirl · 17/05/2010 20:19

The very best of luck to you both. It sounds as though you have been through the mill and I wish your DH-to-be all the good luck in the world. Sounds as though he is beating the bastard good and proper! It also sounds as though you have youth and energy and love on your side.

Here's to this time next year having your little bundle of joy.

FancyALittle · 23/06/2010 14:16

A further update: so much for feeling fairly settled! I've just been offered a new job that I'm taking and we've just been given 2 months notice to move by the landlord (who wants ot sell). That happened to us not 4 months ago, so we will have moved twice this year! I don't know if I feel settled enough, but the desire to want to have a baby is so SO great.

You'll see me around the ditherers and waiting to TTC thread.

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