Husband in his 40's...

[MountainFairy]

Dear all,

My husband is 43 (I am 32). We have been TTC for about 6 months so far. I just got Zita West's book on fertility and I suddenly have different worries. Apparently men after 35 have a MUCH higher chance of chromosome abnormalities and therefore birth defects, etc. Suddenly I am worrying not just about fertility, but what conception may mean for the baby. DH says it is pointless worrying about it. I suppose he is right. But we were never warned by the doctors about our ages etc. Is this something I should be worried about? We are going on a major health kick, which I suppose is the only thing we can really do. Any other ladies out there with 40 something DHs?

Well I had my ds at 45 after an ovarian tumour and being told I couldn't have children. My dp was 56 when ds was born. Quite a surprise and perfect.

By higher rates of abnormalities, do they mean from 1 in 2 million to 1 in 300,000. That would be seven times as high but still not exactly likely.

I'd say the best thing you can do agree in advance what tests you will go for when you get pregnant...amniocentesis etc and then take each day at a time.

In fact, thinking about it, my brother's two were born when he was in his forties, and two out of three sisters had theirs when hubbies were in forties. Nothing wrong with any of them.

In fact, if my family is anything to go by, 30's/40's partnerships are positively fruitful. So no, nothing to worry about. I'd just go and have lots of fun!

Thank you so much Kathyjelly. That is very encouraging! And I am very glad to hear your happy story.

P.S. I have been trying to find out exact likelyhoods but to no avail. I think I'll just stop silly internet research and just ask my GP! Far more sensible.