How do you define infertile?

[queenoftheslatterns]

have been reading another thread and thinking about it, how is the term "infertile" defined in rl? it does seem to be bandied around an awful lot with people who struggle for 18m considering themselves to be infertile when thats not uncommon at all. I genuinely dont want to upset anyone, I know how sensitive this issue is and that it can seem like every month is a stab in the heart, but now we have been ftc for 4.5y with no baby to show for it, but 10 mc's would we be infertile?

Lots of medical type definitions suggest it is the inability to become pregnant after 1 year of trying. I think this is for the purpose of getting treatment though, rather than necesarily a long term problem.

It is the inability to concieve, or in a man the inability to impregnate.

I guess if you can get pregant but mc this is not technically being infertile, but anther issue, probably with another technical or medical term. Still horrendous and I would imagine in many ways even worse, knowing you can concieve but there is something preventing the pregnancy continuing.

I would consider myself and my DH as suffering froms econdary infertility. We do have one DD. It took us a whole to conceve her - 15m, early mc and then another 14/15m of TTC. However we have now been TTC for aout 5.5 years for #2 with no hint of success at all. I have had two ops, hormone treatment, Clomid to no avail. We have both been tested and there are no obvious problems preventing fertility.

hmm, it took us 3y to ttc ds and the problems we have had since he was born are almost certainly down to a uterine problem, so i define myself as not having a body that is fertile enough to carry a child.

We struggled for 4 years but conceived naturally in the end so I would have defined myself as sub-fertile not infertile. Number 2 was conceived after 6 months of not really trying so now I tend to think we were just incredibly unlucky for those years. When you're going through it the precise terminology is rather irrelevant.

Yes, sounds like a fair definiteion.

Didn't mean to offend BTW when saying not sure if ability to concieve and not carry being inferile or not. Just wondered if there was a different term. But what you say in last post makes sense - not being fertile enough to carry.

It is all pretty horrid isn't it?

I think the term "infertile" being used for 1 year+ TTC if for medical treatment reasons on the whole. Infact for people of 35y it is classed at over 6m of TTC.

I guess infertility can also be termporary and permanent, so again timescales would vary.

my definition (have no idea whether medically this is correct) is that infertile is the inability to produce a live birth (without medical intervention).

Of course whilst you are still trying you can;t really be sure (unless a very very clear reason like not ovulating at all) you are infertile but just subfertile ie less fertile than normal.

If you are already have a child as Hula says you would be described as having secondary infertility.

Perhaps a doctor will come along and tell me I'm wrong but that's certainly my understanding from my intimate acquaintance with various fertility experts.

not at all, i understand why people get upset though. what has you cons said or have you just been dismissed (as we have) (its lissie btw)

gaelicsheep, totally agree. i actually find it easier to cope with now than i did 2 years ago, which is odd.

nhs says: A couple will only be diagnosed as being infertile if they have not managed to have a baby after two years of trying.

i do not like the term at all.

Have now been discharged as we didn't want to go down the assisted conception route.

The consultant believes the Asherman's Syndrome is sorted and that everything could be fine. He was convinced we would have a child naturally. Obviously that hasnt been the case. There has been nothing, no signs, no hints, nothing at all.

And I am still not convinced all is well. My monthly pain has gone, for which I am truely grateful, but the rest is still not normal IMO. Bt what can you do when tests and consultants reckon all is well.

Have you now been discharged also? Is ther nothing that can be done to help, or have you decided against further help, or is it not possible?

"i actually find it easier to cope with now than i did 2 years ago, which is odd. "

I agree. I think it is a sense of reluctant acceptance almost.

Does anyone know whether a problem causing "infertility" can actually be resolved by finally having a child? Because I do actually think there was something wrong for those 4 years. Periods were up the swanny, I had pain for 2 weeks in every 4, etc etc. Since having DS everything seemed to go back to normal.

Well pregnncy can trigger all manner of hormone changes within the body, so I assume it is perfectly possible.

how frustrating for you.

the cons has drawn a blank, ive asked for progesterone, he doesnt think theres enough evidence asked about NK testing, they dont do it. instead he wants to try heparin (my blood is v thin and i am aneamic anyway) despite symptoms accompanying a mc are fever (when your temp drops before period/mc) illness, shakes and vomitting. oh, and lets not forget "go on holiday"

gaelicsheep, there does seem to be a lot of anecdotal evidence to suggest so. as hula says, pg triggers all kinds of hormonal upheavals, not all negative.

I guess I'm very very lucky then. I feel so much for you people who are still struggling and I wish you all the best for the future, whatever that may bring.

queenoftheslaterns - that must be really hard. an you seen someone else? My consultat, to be fair, was very good and I guess if the tests say all is well...I did try all the horones and Clomid too, but they didn't owkr. I would definitely have felt short changes without having tried though. Is there no way they will give it a go even if just to rule it out?

thank you gaelic.

hula, he won't its very frustrating. we did go up to LWH but they were no better which was v disappointing. we have had a 6m break so will continue trying for another 6m then back to cons if needs be.