whats the point?

[losinghope]

I'm feeling really down at the moment and wondered if anyone had any advice they could give.

After TTC for 16 months without success, DH has suggested Iwe go for tests to check if something might be wrong.

I'm all for this, don't get me wrong, he's ready to give his SA sample and is very supportive, but I feel that because he already has children, hes assumed the problem is mine. Also as he has children, my local PCT does not fund IVF if either partner has children. So... whats the point?

Would you not feel better knowing what the problem is, if indeed there is one? It might be really easily fixed? I have something that I can control with pills and getting my body back into working order has made me feel better.

I am sorry you are feeling so low, I can sympathise, it is rubbish.

Sorry you're feeling down losinghope

The first thing I want to say is do not assume the problem is yours.

I'm having problems TTC no 2 and it turns out that DH has v low sperm count. As we conceived our 1st child ridiculously easily he assumed he had no problems so was v v v shocked when his results came back. I think we both assumed it was going to be my problem. It appears sperm counts can change over time.

Secondly there's lots of treatments for fertility problems, not just IVF. Like chipper says it depends on what the problem is, but either of you may need drugs, lifestyle changes or an operation.

And thirdly, you may not have a fertility problem at all. Perfectly healthy couples with no fertility problems can take a year or 2 to conceive. Sometimes it just takes time.

I think in your case there's no harm in going for tests just to see what (if anything) is going on.