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Conception

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Should I just accept and throw in the towel

5 replies

lostitoday · 24/04/2009 09:59

Hi
Its killing me to say it but I have more or less come to the realisation that I cannot have any more children but at the same time I am still hoping.
I will try and explain my situation without rambling too much. The trouble is that I know that many people on here although we are all facing the heartbreak of not falling pregnant as hoped are still facing maybe a differnt challenge to myself I feel as though I am on my own with this.
I suppose I am just hoping that there will be someone on here who maybe is experiencing similar problems or if someone could try and put thereselves in my situation and tell me what they would do as I am going out of my head and I am so troubled.
I am 38 and I have been ttc for 20 months without any luck.
Last October after experiencing absent periods, some ill effects possibly menopausel and then a high fsh of 62 I was diagnosed as having premature ovarian failure.
I was told by my gyno to take a months supply of hrt whenever my periods stop to get my ovaries going again because the first time we tried that it worked and I got my cycle back for three months and a day 21 test hsowed that I had ovulated.
I was however told that if I ever didn,t get my cycle back for a couple of months or so after future hrt then that would show I had reached menopause and I would have to go on hrt permanently.
My periods recently did stop again and I did what I was instructed to do and took another months supply of hrt I of course got the expected bleed at the end of that.
Now it has been 35 days since that bleed and no sign of a af and I know that I am suffering from hot flushes with a vengence.
The thing is is that while I took the hrt I was using opk's and a clearblue monitor and in the middle of taking it I had positive readings on each making me think that while taking the hrt it was spuring my ovaries inot action.
If my ovaries are that sensitive then I am thinking that maybe going onot hrt permanently will result in a pregnancy if it can possibly restore what last bit of fertility I may have.
Of course with no sign of a af it probably shows I am definately menopausel.
Please I don,t know what to do my own doctor doesn,t seem that clued up on this sort of thing and I am frustrated with the infertility clinic as its ages before I can get an appointment and there is only one person who I find any good there and half the time he isn,t there on the day.
Please what would you do in my siuation would you just go on the hrt and monitor your cycle with opk's and the clearblue monitor and hope for the best or would you be pressing for more involvement of the infertility clinic as if my ovaries are that sensitive to hrt then maybe there is hope.

OP posts:
lostitoday · 24/04/2009 10:04

I forgot to mention that I have been monitoring with again with the clearblue and opk's and I have not had a single positive not even a high reading on my monitor which probably accounts for no af.
I think that my ovaries have shot down for good but maybe the hrt will help.

OP posts:
lostitoday · 24/04/2009 10:07

Anyone please

OP posts:
lostitoday · 24/04/2009 10:15

bump

OP posts:
Caitni · 24/04/2009 11:15

Hi Lostittoday

I'm sorry to hear of your problems . I don't have experience of this but am bumping for you in the hope that someone else can help.

Has your doctor recommended egg donation to you? You may want to find the other women on here who know that using donor eggs are their only option to get pregnant, as presumably they may have a similar experience to you, or at least some experience of accepting that they can't rely on their own fertility (see here).

One other thing is that you may find more women who know about this condition/have experienced it or women who have made the decision to move on from ttc for various reasons on Fertility Friends rather than on Mumsnet. I love Mumsnet but I'm starting IVF soon to try and conceive our first child and I've found FF to be a mine of useful informtion for problems ttc/needing assisted conception. And to get some specific support for this condition you may also want to contact the Daisy Network, who support women in your situation.

Caitni x

andiem · 24/04/2009 11:19

lost it today I relly feel for you I have been in exactly your position I was diagnosed as pfo at the age of 38 and dh and I decided to go down the egg donation route. It did take me about 18 months to get my head round it but now we have ds2 and I couldn't be happier. We went abroad for treatment for 2 reasons better success and availbility of donors and the fact that donors are anonymous in spain
if you want more info you could e mail me at
andrea dot cockett at dsl dot pipex dot coma
I also got a lot of support from the fertility friends website

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