Anyone else able to test, but, avoiding it incase of disappointment?

[1LittlePrincess]

Hi there I have been on MN TTC board for a while but a not a regular poster so you may/ may not recognize me.

Last year (april) I had a miscarriage at 7 +3 weeks, and have been TTC since. Haven?t been having much luck though, so have not actually reached the stage where I could think about testing as AF has always reared her ugly head.

I am now on CD 34, UCL is 32 days, but although I could test I?m really, really scared.

I almost feel like if I buy a test I will tempt fate and AF will start (isn?t it crazy what comes into your mind when you are TTC).

I am feeling quietly confident that things are positive, which will make it even harder if it?s a BFN!
I have been feeling dizzy, bloated and had stretchy feelings low down in my tummy. Also had some slight bloody discharge about 8-9 days after Ov (possibly implantation?). I really don?t know what to do I always thought that I would be having to be restrained from the HPT aisle if I made it to CD32, but I?m so worried that I?m building myself up for a massive fall.

Anyone else I the same situation? Thanks in advance x

Hi 1LP,
I'm afraid I'm not able to test at the moment, but just wanted to wish you lots of luck. When you do pluck up the courage to test (and there is no rush) then I hope you get the result you're so desperately after.

I can never hold off testing, but completely understand your nerves. I had 2 mc's last year, and ttc again is terrifying. There is so much balancing on the result of that little test... If you are pg, and I really hope that is the case, then holding off until you're ready to test won't make any difference. On the other hand, the longer you hold off, the more you'll get your hopes up, and if it's just a long cycle (for whatever reason) then you'll have further to fall.

Good luck for whatever you decide to do - I shall check back to see how you're getting on x