Any1 trying for another baby and have a baby/child with special needs?

[proudestmummyever]

Hi 1st mnth of ttc for number 3, hoping all goes well.

I have a dd, 7 from prev relationship, perfectly healthy, and a 2 yr old Ds who has a genetic disorder,his chromosomes rearranged during conception, so this involves hypotonia(really low muscle tone) so cant walk etc, prob wont 4 a while, has severe epilepsy, in hospital quite a bit, damage to brain, dev delay in all areas , hard work but soo worth it, he is a little star, such a brave boy.

Myself and my partner of 6 years went to see a geneticist, have bn tested and our chromosomes came bk ok, and we have less than 1% chance it happening again, I have also had 3 miscarriages, 2 within 4 mnths of each other when my dd was approx 2, and 1 mc after my son was born, that 1 was Jan 08, but were told that just bn unlucky with mc's and ttly not connected to what is wrong with our ds...anyone else deal with a child with sn and went on to have more kids etc? Or tryin just now?

Any1?

No real advice but..
Ds (now 14) has quad cp. When he was formally diagnosed at 10 months, I asked his paediatrician what I could do. Amongst many other things, she said I should go off and have another baby as I had initially planned(he was our first). I thought this was a terrible suggestion so I didn't.
I went on to have a dd seven years later.
When I reflect now, I think the paed was quite right, I should have gone ahead. I think it would have been good for ds, and certainly good for dh and I.
He still has the same paed, I should tell her she was quite right.
If you and your partner feel the same (and presume you do as you have both been tested), good luck to you.

Thanku springlamb, yr story very positive, I am just worrying about hw we r going to get around with a baby if my ds not walking, how did u manage if you dont mind me asking?

Well ds could stand at the time, so I bought the biggest BuggyBoard I could find.
But you could use a sling for the baby, some of the double buggies are suitable for a largish toddler and a small baby.
Think there's a recent thread in SN about just this situation, will have a look.
And I am aware of a lady who had 3 under 4 at one point, the eldest being a non-walker.
She still posts here, so she has lived through it!

a sling

it's perfectly possible - I have a dd aged 8 with cp and a 4 year old

I had a sling when dd2 was very little

you just manage somehow and yes it is worth it

Hello proudest.
I have a 6 year old DS with hypotonia (diagnosed around 11 months) and he is also ASD (diagnosed just a few months ago). Also have a 4 year old ds who (fingers crossed) appears to be developing normally. My second ds was born when eldest just 20 months - I was travelling to physio in London (from herts) with a near 2 year old non walker and a new born baby. had a double buggy but it was really difficult to get on and off trains and tubes on my own - its amazing how little help you get from other passengers!!! I have to say it was very very difficult - my youngest ds has been with me to ds1's various therapies for all of his life. however, the realtionship they have developed is easily worth all the trials and difficulties I have had to deal with. they adore each other and I know that having a little brother has really helped my eldest ds. he is quite isolated at school with no real friends but has a playmate at home - not just his mum and dad. he tries to keep up with ds2 so it really encourages him to challenge himself. good luck to you - the positives in our case have by far outweighed the negatives.

Hi guys, well I am soo glad to hear yr positive stories!! Not that I needed my arm twisting lol!!!

Bn trying ths mnth, but I am also DESPERATELY wanting to lose weight before , I am now a size 16 and dont wanna be HUGE ths time