To IVF or not to IVF......

[peanuthead]

My situation is this -

Have a gorgeous 18 month old dd - took 15 months and 4 IUI's to conceive her.

I'm now 40 (blagh...) have been TTC no 2 for 10 months and have had 3 failed IUI's. My FSH is a lovely 6.5, DH's sperm is fine, we're totally unexplained. Been taking all the supplements for 3 months now.

So what do we do? We're staring IVF in the face and I'm terrified - I react v badly to my own endogenous hormones so can't imagine how bad I'll be with IVF ones - even the small doses of IUI stimulants give me migraines and nausea.

Plus I have an ovarian cyst which will need aspirating if we have IVF -at a cost of just under a grand - it's not a problem otherwise, I still ovulate.

Our finances are very limited, will be borrowing money from family for any treatment we need from now on (can't even bear to think about that!)

So just wondered what anyone out there would do? Bearing in mind it took 4 IUI's for dd, do we have another go when we can't really afford it or knowing the success rate is it just money down the drain? Is it too soon to consider IVF and should we try naturally a while longer - considering my age?

I really wish there was someone out there who could give me a neutral opinion as - of course - the clinic just say have ivf - they want my money....

will you get any free go's on nhs? also, why not have IUI again - waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay cheaper

I really feel for you and I know nobody can tell you what to do.

Deep down you probably know what you want to do.

How would you feel if you never attempted IVF and you ended up not having a second child?

No free goes - have a dd, am 40 and also no time to wait.

I know it's way cheaper but the success rate is so pants and it just feels a bit like a waste of a grand we don't have and another couple of months we also don't have.

Not sure if I'm just putting off the inevitable by having another go either...

oops crossed post

I will have ivf eventually if I need to - i think what I want somneone somewhere to tell me is should I wait a while or bite the bullet and just crack on with it...

Wow! I'm v at your FSH.

IVF has a much higher success rate than IUI so I would try not to compare.

With such a good FSH and no problem with your dh, and taking into account your age, I would have a cycle of IVF personally. IVF can often be a diagnostic tool for 'unexplained' IF and can throw up issues that you may not be aware of. The fact that you have a child is a very good sign of your fertility.

I understand the worry about money - we remortgaged to fund ours, but I appreciate that is probably not an option in this climate. However, the way I justified it is that I didn't have time to wait and save the money.

I wish you luck whatever you decide.

Sorry, just re-read my post and it sounds really garbled.

In a nutshell - go for it.

yeah the remortagaging was something we were really casual about but recently discovered we can't get enough money to cover it as our house value has dropped so much. that was a shock in itself.....

I know - I cried when I got my fsh result, can't belive it, feel like getting a badge with it written on

Lol at the badge with your FSH on! Sadly, only women with conception problems will even know theirs - we are a select bunch .

Sorry to hear about your house value .

I was advised that financially four IUIs cost the same as one IVF and the cumulative sucess rate of 4 IUIs is not as good as the sucess rate of 1 IVF. Simple stats have meant I'm saving for another go at IVF rather than waste spend money on IUI. Having said that, this advice came from my clinic who may well want my money....

Is it worth looking into one of the more natural IVF's? From what I can remember reading, think they are a bit cheaper, and less disrupting on the hormones.

hmm i find it really hard to trust what a clinic says as they're not at all impartial...

and I know exactly what you mean about iui being a waste of money - even though we conceived that way before.

think we may have to just go for it.

did comnsider natural ivf but think the success rate is simialr to iui so again maybe a waste of money.

how many goes have you had so far nomore? it's also the whole 2ww thing - find it hard enough after iui think a bfn after IVF would finish me off.....

We've only had one go at IVF so far (May 08) - have been saving money for another go ever since...The 2ww was hard but my AF arrived before my testing date, so I didn't have all the disappointment of a BFN on test day. I still wept buckets that day though Have you looked more into 'natural' IVF or even IVM? I can't say I know all that much about them but they involve less 'mucking about' with your hormones.

thanks everyone
we saw the consultant yesterday and decided on one more iui - started injecting today - and then straight into IVF the following cycle. it probably won;t work but just felt I wanted one last go before we enter the world of proper treatment.

He said the same thing as the rest of you - probably better to go to IVF straight away due to my age and the higher success rate and that PCT are much more willing to fund IVF due to success rates etc.

But I didn't want to go into it feeling not quite ready - once I#ve had this IUI will be totally ready (well as ready as you ever are) and feel like we've totally done all we can at this stage and I can move onto the next.

will go onto the assisted conception thread once we start.....